How to work through feelings of social isolation

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

While this is not about alcoholics I know that abusing alcohol can lead to feelings of social isolation and depression. I thought this was worth a read.

How to Work Through Feelings of Social Isolation | eHow.com

[one2many]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

This is very good stuff Ktab....maybe you should post this in the toolbox.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Thanks. I liked this passage:
"Remember, emotions are like weather patterns passing through your mind. Just because you are lonely today, does not mean that you will be lonely tomorrow. Your future only resembles your past if you allow it to do so."

[one2many]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

I also think it is important to note that you can also feel lonely in a house full of people...sometimes unbearably so.

Grwat article, I will refer to this again and again x

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Being in a crowd can actually exacerbate the feeling of loneliness imo.

Again, from this article:
"Stop comparing your life to the lives of others. Absolutely everything you "know" about others is based on assumptions of a partial picture. We can never really know what goes on inside the mind and heart of another person, because what we show to the world is an edited version of ourselves. You know how it is: we put on happy faces and rarely talk about our pain even with those who are closest to us; therefore, what we see of others is really an incomplete picture. Comparing the complete picture of your life (which, of course, only you see and experience every day) to the incomplete picture of another person's life is futile and stupid. Remember, just because you see a group of people laughing while hanging out together at a bar doesn't mean they are all having a good time. Just because you see a couple locked in a loving embrace doesn't mean they don't fight beyond closed doors. You cannot and should not judge the quality of your life based on what you see of the lives of your friends or stories you hear in the media."

[one2many]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Excellent.

[Funny Girl]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

This was very good. The part about volunteering is very valuable & has always helped me throughout my life - it puts things in perspective & gets you to stop thinking about yourself all the time. I'll print this one & keep it handy.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

I like this as well, its good, written by the same author, How to Live Alive. It touched a note with me.

How to Live Alive | eHow.com

[KateH1]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Hi K!
Wow, this is excellent information! Thank you so much for sharing! I hope that you are doing well, my friend. You are such a dear soul.

XO Kate

[rubywillow]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Thanks, K. I am physically isolated too, and Hubs has been pushing me to get out more and be involved, but my life is very demanding (so is he!). I am, however, going to make more of an effort now. I need to crawl out of my hole.
I have an Uncle about my age who is going through his second bout of severe depression, and is really struggling. His 'man's man' brothers were not at all supportive, not understanding him, but we've talked. Now, he's like a shell. Vacant. Doesn't want any interaction with others. I think I'll send this to him. He really needs our prayers, and I'm very worried about him.

[mario]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Great stuff ktab, Thank you :-)

[Chillgirl]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

KTAB - I loved this article and was pleased that I already practise most of the steps outlined.

Speaking of social isolation, this has been on my mind increasingly and just wanted to share it. Obviously in the early days I completely hybernated as I couldnt have handled being out around alcohol. This was a humungous challenge for me as I had previously lead a pretty party lifestyle. However as time has gone on my sobriety has changed every aspect of my life including my social life but even more so its changed my thinking about life and the desires I have.

I am now comfortable going out again and being around drinkers which doesnt bother me at all although obviously sitting in a bar all night is now totally boring!

However what I have found is that I now crave isolation and im never happier than when Im at home alone. I now go out of my way to avoid socializing and sometimes I can go for several days without seeing anyone and I love it! My phone rings several times a day with friends and family and I increasingly cant be bothered to pick it up. This is not due to any type of depression, I honestly couldnt be happier with my new AF life but I just love my solitude. I am never bored and always find things to do, im reading more than before and doing a lot of inner work on myself.

The issue im having is that in the back of my mind there is this nagging voice that tells me this is not normal behaviour, probably because society says so. But surely if I am happy with the situation there is nothing wrong with it?

[Guest]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

You Are Right On The Money Chillgirl

Ovid said: 'A man who lives well, lives unnoticed.'

I never answer my 'phone. I have an answerphone for that. Before I got the answering machine I used to put the 'phone in the fridge.
I much prefer my own company, and as you say, it gives you the opportunity to do inner work on yourself. Most of the great sages have chosen isolation at one time or another, sometimes for lengthy periods.

Ignore the social pressures...folly wants company.
Trust your own judgement...when you need to socialise, you will.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Hi guys my intention here was to try to help people who have those feelings of self loathing, low self esteem and isolation that years of abusing AL inevitably brings. When we finally clear our bodies and minds of this cycle of self destruction there is quite often a void left. I have seen this mentioned in many posts.

Caysea touched on this in a very good post yesterday
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...tml#post905453

I wasnt advocating we all go out and try to become the life and soul of the party, it is all about feeling happy in our own skin. That means different levels of social interaction for different people. Personally I think being able to spend time alone in our own company contentedly and at peace is something to be cherished.

'Without understanding how your inner nature evolves, how can you possibly discover eternal happiness? Where is eternal happiness? It's not in the sky or in the jungle; you won't find it in the air or under the ground. Everlasting happiness is within you, within your psyche, your consciousness, your mind. That's why it's important that you investigate the nature of your own mind.'
Lama Thubten Yeshe

[IAD]

How to work through feelings of social isolation

Good "stuff" K........I sometimes feel that I have committed "Social Suicide" ! My wife tells me that everytime I get on the dance floor ..Ha! Thanks for the info ! IAD