Hi all.
I am sorry for my recent behaviour and defensive outbursts. I've read and re read that thread and i only now see, that the way i carried on was unexceptable and i only now see that all that everyone said was only to try show me the seriousness of my actions.
I have finally been able to see that you were not condeming me but only my stupid and inconsiderate actions, that could've actually turned out to be a tragic story. I feel so horible for all that i have said to everyone, and i am truely sorry. Can you forgive me?
I had put my family in danger and i've realised that i when i drink, i do not think further than myself. I have since thought about what i would've done if anything had happened to my wife or child that day. I am keeping a visual of burying my little baby, and keeping it in my heart and mind about how i would feel if that was ever the case. I feel terrible and disgusted in myself and thinking about what i put my family through brings me to tears.
I will use this visual everytime i think of drinking. I hope in time everyone can forgive me for being such a defensive asshole and for saying nasty hurtful things because of my pride.
I have truely learned a lesson and i will also not bring up the issue of God in these threads anymore either as i realise now that my beliefs difer from a lot of people and each and everyone of us has the right to believe whatever we want to. so i'm sorry about that too.
I never meant to cause trouble. I have received wonderful advice and great help from everyone on this site and i'd like the MWO family to accept me back and allow me to try again. I hope my apology can be accepted. It is sincere and from the heart. I do realise that you were all only trying to get it into my think skull and i remember from the beginning that i asked you all to kick my ass if i needed it and last Thurs i did need it. So thanks. It did get through to me eventually. I just needed to work through my own issues before i could see the truth and light of your responses.
I know i need help. Lots more than i believed and i hope you'll be willing to keep helping me with butt kickings, and great advice. I am sorry! Peace... Dizi!:upset:
I am sorry for my recent behaviour and defensive outbursts. I've read and re read that thread and i only now see, that the way i carried on was unexceptable and i only now see that all that everyone said was only to try show me the seriousness of my actions.
I have finally been able to see that you were not condeming me but only my stupid and inconsiderate actions, that could've actually turned out to be a tragic story. I feel so horible for all that i have said to everyone, and i am truely sorry. Can you forgive me?
I had put my family in danger and i've realised that i when i drink, i do not think further than myself. I have since thought about what i would've done if anything had happened to my wife or child that day. I am keeping a visual of burying my little baby, and keeping it in my heart and mind about how i would feel if that was ever the case. I feel terrible and disgusted in myself and thinking about what i put my family through brings me to tears.
I will use this visual everytime i think of drinking. I hope in time everyone can forgive me for being such a defensive asshole and for saying nasty hurtful things because of my pride.
I have truely learned a lesson and i will also not bring up the issue of God in these threads anymore either as i realise now that my beliefs difer from a lot of people and each and everyone of us has the right to believe whatever we want to. so i'm sorry about that too.
I never meant to cause trouble. I have received wonderful advice and great help from everyone on this site and i'd like the MWO family to accept me back and allow me to try again. I hope my apology can be accepted. It is sincere and from the heart. I do realise that you were all only trying to get it into my think skull and i remember from the beginning that i asked you all to kick my ass if i needed it and last Thurs i did need it. So thanks. It did get through to me eventually. I just needed to work through my own issues before i could see the truth and light of your responses.
I know i need help. Lots more than i believed and i hope you'll be willing to keep helping me with butt kickings, and great advice. I am sorry! Peace... Dizi!:upset:
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