PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

[sick of being sick]

Please forgive me for hurting anyone's feelings by my misuse of the word "sober". I feel absolutely horrible about this. Below are someone's posts that I am referring to. I would never intentionally hurt or discourage anyone and I am so very sorry that I have said things that have done that. I completely agree with all of you that being sober is being alcohol free. I am not trying to mod. I want to be completely sober more than anything! I am struggling to not drink ever and even though I have fallen many times, that is my ultimate goal. I've not put much importance on counting days, but I do respect those who do. I was wrong to use the word sober so freely and not give the word the respect that it deserves. Today I am 2 days alcohol free. I am starting completely over on my journey. I want to be an encourager, because we are all on the same journey...to get and to stay sober. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I have learned alot from this ordeal and I pray that you will please forgive me. I love all of you.

"Something was posted recently, and it has made me wonder; what do YOU consider to be the meaning of Sober? I had my last drink on February 07 of this year, so I am somewhere around 5.5 months "Sober". I have not had one drop since that day. To me, that is the true meaning of Sober. However, there are others here that have been here the same amount of time, that have drank along the way, but consider themselves to have been sober the same amount of time. Somehow I feel cheated of my accomplishment but maybe I need to realize that my definition of sober may not be the same as others, or possibly not even correct. I have been torn as to wether to post this or not because it may upset those that have a different definition than I but it is something that has been bothering me."

"You and I have interacted before, in a positive way. The thread I started was not an attack on Moderators, and I do not have any illwill against moderators. Hell when I started this journey, thats what I wanted but i ended up on a different path. My thread was directed against one member and instead of addressing them personally, I took the cowards way out and posted a thread. My problem is not that some one is moderating and posted they were sober, my problem is that this person proclaims to be sober even though they have gotten drunk 7 times in the last 6 months and takes credit that they have been sober for 6 months. I have been in what I consider "sober" for the same amount of time, and I did not get drunk once during that time hence i felt that anyone can just post that they are "sober" and get congratulated for it. Modders are people who are or are trying to continue to drink but in a controlled manor. I have no issue with that at all. I would not want anyone here to leave because of people's opinions. I respect you and do not want you to feel that you are discriminated against."

[Doggygirl]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

SOS, congratulations on Day 2. I don't believe I saw whatever it is you are referring to with your apology so cannot comment on that. Just wanted to offer you encouragement. This isn't easy, but it IS possible. Good that you are dusted off and back on the wagon. If I can, you can. If you can, I can.

DG

[rubywillow]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

Vick, I've told you, girl, QUIT APOLOGIZING!!!! You are the person you are, becoming better each day, if that's possible. We go through so MANY moods as we find ourselves. But you are probably the last person I would ever see hurt someone. We just are all different in our paths. I love you, Vick.

[mama bear]

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ditto what Ruby said Vicki...you have really let this upset you and it's not necessary....we love you just the way you are

[sunshinedaisies]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

Vicki - you have apologized enough! We get it! I am really pleased that you are back on the wagon again - good for you. It isn't easy and that goes for all of us. Whatever it was that you did wasn't intentional, and I am glad that you are here on your journey with us all - we all need all the help we can get from anyone. Hang in there love - and just keep going forward!

Hugs to you, Sunshinedaisies xx

[Time to change]

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Hello there,

I just wanted to say that its not a competition, it doesn't matter whose gone how many days or how many slips they have or haven't had, its about the journey we're all on so you really shouldn't feel the need to apologise for how you chose to go about that journey to anyone. Keep going in your own way and you'll get to the place you want to be.
xx

[New Creation]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

ditto ditto ditto

[dancelot]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

SOS - Give yourself credit for times you stayed AF, take responsibility for and learn what you can from those times as well as the slips. A month here, 2 months there, whatever - it shows some of what you are capable of. I know (and most people here) that you would never hurt anyone intentionally (we all know that can happen around here, and I'd guess 99% of the time it's not intended that way!).

Time to change makes a great point - it's not a competition, it's about the journey. That is true for all of us. Hang in there - good on getting back up! Take care. :l :h

[IAD]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

SOS.....your my girl....hang in their ...we'll get through this thing called life ! Ha! Tony .

[Guitarista]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

Hiya SOS,

Congratulation's on day 2! Bravo! Nothing can change your sober time, or your journey. You are winning by just being here and alway's trying, and you are DOING as well.

Relax, it's a long road, as long as we are learning, and in the ring fighting. Do what you have to do, and know that you can do it.

Best wishes, G.

[southernbelle47]

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Life is a journey not a destination.

Take a deep breath and believe ....

xoxo Belle

[sick of being sick]

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Thank you all for your kind words of encouragement. I am very sad that the person who felt cheated because of me has not responded to my public or private apology. I pray she has not left because of me or still has ill feelings towards me. I am so terribly sorry.

[IAD]

PLEASE ACCEPT MY APOLOGY

Sick.....don't worry about it ! Just like Christ said...."If they accept you give them your blessing....If not shake the dust off your sandels and go on" It's all you can do Vicki........IAD

[Hippy Chick]

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SOBS - You have made me rethink my signature. I started this journey in January and in June I had four or five drinks over the space of a week to try and see if I could moderate. I didnt get drunk so I assumed I stayed "sober". I have had as my signature since then as being sober since January. Now I think I should change it or alter it.

Thanks for bringing this to my attention as I would hate to think I had cheated those who have been AF since they started.

Oh and if you are wondering.... I chose not to moderate and stay AF.

Hip

[rubywillow]

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For many it is complete abstinence, for some modding works. I don't count anything. I used to count everything; days, hours, pounds, AL, calories, cigarettes, miles,........you name it. But I've come to understand for me, it's just about the here and now and what I can do with THIS day. I've had lots of dreams lately about the happiest times of my childhood. Then I looked at alcohol as such an evil thing, and was so hurt when I found out my beloved Daddy actually drank it. But he, then I, went through the fire, even though he hoped I wouldn't, wanted to spare me, and he came out as my greatest hero.
I can't stress enough we cannot follow a pattern, just learn from others and our own mistakes. And Vick, we are NOT responsible for anyone's choice in life. It comes from within us, and what WE want. Yes, it's wonderful to have the support friends give us here. But some things we must do alone. And as with other faults, trying to put the blame on someone else to relieve our own responsibility in our destiny is a lie, to ourselves and others. My mantra is accountability in all my actions. It's what mankind has stuggled to understand for ages; fate, karma, destiny, but mostly what we decide we will do with ourselves.
You are a supporter of everyone who crosses your path. Your great faith is something that sets you apart, and lifts you up. But you cannot take on the responsibility for what others decide to do. We are not that instrumental in their lives, and to blame someone for our failings is a pretense, stalling really facing ourselves. I'm not saying that supporting someone, when they are searching for help, is not a great thing. But we can only give the benefit of our experiences, and loving support, while they find themselves. And you cannot be the cause of their failure. It is in each of us to win or fail, and we have to be true to ourselves to win.