Do you believe in God?

[Change]

or, a higher order?

I don't. The reason i say this is because i've tried hard and i honestly don't believe anyone is "on my side". I don't believe in any divine force and i certainly don't believe i am being "looked after".

Honestly, i feel "nothing"... Surely, there must be more to life than this??

[Change]

Do you believe in God?

I have nothing to live for:

1. My parents will be fine. I will leave them money.

What's to live for? The next 30 / 40 years of hell? I ask you this.

[greeneyes]

Do you believe in God?

change... doesn't seem like you are OK. What is going on to make you feel this way?

[Chillgirl]

Do you believe in God?

Change - I think we all feel this way at times but these feelings are transient and they pass, there are always reasons to live if we look for them

[greeneyes]

Do you believe in God?

change I'm going to go for a walk - it keeps my spirits up. Maybe you could do the same? I'll check back when I return.

[Draggy]

Do you believe in God?

change, you're parents will not be fine, believe me , they will be devastated and their lives will never be the same again, believe me, i was nearly in your parents shoes.
xxx draggy

[sunshinedaisies]

Do you believe in God?

Change - do you have someone you can call? Or go into chat here? As Draggy said, your parents will NOT be fine, neither will any friends - and if or not you believe in God doesn't come into it - you are here for a reason - we all get to feeling how you feel - it seems that life just isn't worth the hassle - but then something turns and things do work out. Please check back in with us - talk - things are never so bad that we can't work them out with help from friends. Talk to us - please?

hugs to you, Sunshinedaisies xx

[dancelot]

Do you believe in God?

Change - I believe it's something found in us and also something like an energy that connects everything and everybody, and sometimes refer to it as God, sometimes as the universe, but it's the same in my mind.

In AA for example, many people don't (and won't) believe in God but might use the "higher power" of the group's positive energy as as their higher power. "As you understand him" is a how AA defines God, so it's not any particular religion's view of what that is, it's whatever way each individual wants to see it. I have heard various definitions including the wind and a moving van (didn't get that one, but it worked for somebody at some point).

I have used in the past what I'd call my more positive self (and sometimes had to look deep and far back to remember it) to tap into that energy. I don't see God so much as an outside force that can control everything and punishes us, etc, but more as allowing myself to be open to positive energy. I have found things such as changing thought patterns, gratitude for even the smallest things when things aren't going so well helps turn my thinking around when I start going into dark places. That and knowing I can only live in the here and now. If I put it in "God" terms, I also believe it's our job to find God, not God's to find us. By that I mean be open to it, allow it in. To me that's what prayer, meditation, deep breathing, do. Allowing rather than expecting, and then something comes, and occasionally it's pretty powerful, sometimes like a whisper and feeling of peace within.

I can find in it nature, or through music, or art, or riding my horse. I find reading short passages such as those found in Daily Recovery Readings and just contemplating them helps. Some are religious passages, some not, but I can usually find something useful. They are short and easy to read, and a good way to start the day or reset my brain when it needs it.

You sound as if you are feeling low. I don't know if you are AF or not, but but I do know sometimes we are experiencing a lot of feelings we masked with AL, and then they become obvious without it. When I was still drinking, I felt pretty "soulless" as well. It was difficult to tap into the purer positive part of myself.

I wish you the best - take care and much love to you! :h

[dancelot]

Do you believe in God?

Change - I wrote that post before I saw your second one. Take care of right now, this moment first.

[betty boop]

Do you believe in God?

Change, Please check in and let us know that you are OK please ..........:l:l

[OverIt2007]

Do you believe in God?

Hi Change,

Im sorry you are feeling this way. I know that God may seem like a distant being who is not there or care for us. Having faith in a God takes a leap of faith and trying to have an open heart to let Him come into. If the door of the heart is closed, then a knocking God cannot enter.

Revelation 3:20

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me!

P.S. Im not trying to create controvery posting this. I will be happy to move to the "What we believe section" with any of this. Im just hoping to offer a little insight to Change.

[Change]

Do you believe in God?

Draggy;923944 wrote: change, you're parents will not be fine, believe me , they will be devastated and their lives will never be the same again, believe me, i was nearly in your parents shoes.
xxx draggy

They'll be fine, believe me. I'm still alive fortunately, or unfortunately. I'm not going to go on, but i just don't see anything "changing"... There is no elusive 'future' for me. I am childless, i don't think i can go on like that.

[red67]

Do you believe in God?

Change;924391 wrote: They'll be fine, believe me. I'm still alive fortunately, or unfortunately. I'm not going to go on, but i just don't see anything "changing"... There is no elusive 'future' for me. I am childless, i don't think i can go on like that.

I didn't think I could be childless either. I am a 43 year old female and not able to have kids. I basically have accepted this, although it is still hard. But I do spend as much time as I can with kids. My roommate has an eight year old daughter that I have been around since she was born I am like her "other mother". I also have a niece and nephews that I have tried to spend as much time as I can with. Sometimes we have to accept what life gives us and do whatever we can that gets us closer to what we want. Some of us cannot have kids and that is not fair, but life is not fair. What about being a "big Brother or Sister" to a needy child. We have to look at all our options and not live in the negative. When all we do is look at the negative you can't see options. There are lots of kids who need a mentor - do you think you can try this option? This can be very rewarding (but I know not the same as being the parent). Believe me I have spent 15 + years agonizing over not being a bio mom but I know it is not going to happen for me so I have to move on and figure out what I can do.

[Change]

Do you believe in God?

red67;924517 wrote: I didn't think I could be childless either. I am a 43 year old female and not able to have kids. I basically have accepted this, although it is still hard. But I do spend as much time as I can with kids. My roommate has an eight year old daughter that I have been around since she was born I am like her "other mother". I also have a niece and nephews that I have tried to spend as much time as I can with. Sometimes we have to accept what life gives us and do whatever we can that gets us closer to what we want. Some of us cannot have kids and that is not fair, but life is not fair. What about being a "big Brother or Sister" to a needy child. We have to look at all our options and not live in the negative. When all we do is look at the negative you can't see options. There are lots of kids who need a mentor - do you think you can try this option? This can be very rewarding (but I know not the same as being the parent). Believe me I have spent 15 + years agonizing over not being a bio mom but I know it is not going to happen for me so I have to move on and figure out what I can do.

I really appreciate you sharing your story with me Red. I long to have kids and literally physically ache nearly each time i see a mother with her infants. I am very sorry you cannot have kids, and am glad you have children around you. My problem is my sister is dead, so little chance of any nieces and nephews. The reason i haven't had kids is that i am same-sex attracted, so there was no chance of an accidental pregnancy. If it's not hard enough being gay, not having kids certainly adds to it. I still have some time (will turn 41 in a few months), but wouldn't want to leave it much longer as i already feel that my time is up. I would also have to find a donor. The last one i asked backed out and i find it hard to forgive him. One day he will be in my position and somebody will not help him out. Oh well.

I also mourn the loss of my kids (not having any) on an almost daily basis and even dreamed about them a few nights ago. The last 2 years i have been dreaming of kids and babies a lot.

I talked with a friend a few nights ago and he said he knows a lesbian couple that adopted a disabled child. My options are fostering (which i have considered) and adoption, if i decide to not have my own biological child, but for some reason, i yearn to have a bio child. I think it's something inherent in being a woman. It sucks. Thanks for listening, i really appreciate it .

[neart]

Do you believe in God?

Hi Change, just wanted to check in and see how you're doing today? I am 30 and single, and have nothing on the horizon at this point. I know I still have time, but I'll be honest that I did not expect to be this age, single and childless and living back home jobless!! But life throws different scenarios at us, we can only plan so much. My view is that relationships, children, etc are a gift, not a right, and something I do hope to have but am not guaranteed - that's how i try to look at it.
Have to talked to anyone about how you feel, to try and come to a different perspective? I know some doors close on us in life, but if we look around we usually find some other door open - there is always something out there for us.
If it helps at all to tell you - I am adopted, and I always swore I would never adopt. I hated the idea of it. Then last year, I was working in an orphanage and was responsible for a little 6 year old girl with autism. I grew so attached to her, and I finally realised what it meant to adopt - and how my mother must have felt. Fair enough, there's no blood relationship, but that doesn't prevent you loving somebody so, so fiercely and wholeheartedly. Also, I met my natural birth mother a few years ago, and boy was I glad that I had been adopted