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    think im gonna struggle today

    im having a feeling today is gonna be a bit of a struggle. ive been having drinking thoughts for about a week. just little things have been setting me off down the thinking of drinking road. i havent and i dont want to. ive had a bad back which is getting me a bit grumpy but im off to the osteopath this afternoon so hopefully it should be a bit better. mr spuds is off out drinking with his mate and its always a major piss up. i used to be ok with it but now it bothers me.. i cant stand being around drunk people. fortunately he usually goes to sleep/ passes out shortly after he comes in but the bit in between does my head in. ive got loads of stuff to do.... even just cleaning, the house is a shit tip but i cant seem to get on with anything... even fun stuff. theres no booze in the house (well there is but its locked away) but the shop is only 2 seconds away. im almost certain im not gonna drink, but the fact i say 'almost' is a worry to me. i know i just need to remind myself of all the reasons why i dont drink but the little gremlin keeps popping into my head. its bloody ridiculous. any advice/support appreciated, i may have heard it all before but i need a quick kicking up the backside today
    Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
    Keep passing the open windows

    #2
    think im gonna struggle today

    Can't post more this a.m., Spud, but I've been collecting quotes online and on this site that help me stay on course, and I hope they're of help to you! Mr. Spuds will still have gone out drinking with his mates, your back will still hurt, the house will still be shite in the morning...but you'll be clear-eyed and clear-headed! And proud instead of ashamed! YOU choose. xoxoxo P.

    alcohol ravages time, energy, love, and money. Four things we can never have enough of.

    “Many of us imagined sobriety as a bleak, boring place where all the fun was sucked out of life and we would live in an eternal purgatory of partylessness. Instead, most of us find an entirely new life, one we couldn't have imagined. Sobriety isn't just a matter of removing drugs and alcohol from our lives. In fact, that's only a small part of it. Sobriety is finding a new way of living that involves engagement where there was withdrawal: generosity where there was self-centerdness: community where there was isolation: joy where there was bitterness: trust where there was cynicism."

    I shan't be fooling around with modding again. It's too much vigilance and hard work and you still give AL too much of your time... "Shall I drink when I go out tonight, and if I do how many will I have... and what will it be..." etc etc... It's just easier not having to deal with that nonsense.

    I do know only too well what it is like to be stuck in a vicious cycle of drink-hangover-regret-loss of self respect-never again-oh just the one wont hurt-drunk yet again........continue ad naseum.

    "There are so many reasons to be sober and only one reason to drink - to be drunk, and I don't want to be drunk anymore."

    Complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation.
    Saint Augustine

    Man seeks to escape himself in myth, and does so by any means at his disposal. Drugs, alcohol, or lies. Unable to withdraw into himself, he disguises himself. Lies and inaccuracy give him a few moments of comfort.
    Jean Cocteau

    My peers, lately, have found companionship through means of intoxication - it makes them sociable. I, however, cannot force myself to use drugs to cheat on my loneliness - it is all that I have - and when the drugs and alcohol dissipate, will be all that my peers have as well.
    Franz Kafka

    Alcohol gives you infinite patience for stupidity.
    Sammy Davis, Jr.

    Alcohol is a very patient drug. It will wait for the alcoholic to pick it up one more time.
    Mercedes McCambridge

    Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed be the facts.
    Finley Peter Dunne
    AF since July 15, 2010. :applouse:
    "People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim." —Ann Landers

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      #3
      think im gonna struggle today

      thanks. thats what i need. maybe i will spend this time getting quotes and stuff like this together in a file. it woill focus me on what i need to focus on
      Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
      Keep passing the open windows

      Comment


        #4
        think im gonna struggle today

        Morning Spuds:

        Here is a quote from a message Skinny Knees posted on a different thread yesterday that you may find helpful:

        "When the thought hits my mind these days, I simply take a stroll down memory lane, and it ain't pretty. I think about all of the things that I did while drunk (cringe), and how I felt the next day, both physically and mentally. That stops the thoughts of drinking for me. I never ever want to go back there."


        I'm keeping this one in my easy access folder to remind me of why I never want to go back.

        Hang in there!
        John
        AF since 7/13/2010

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          #5
          think im gonna struggle today

          PM sent.
          Ethanol is a toxic chemical, why would I drink it?

          Comment


            #6
            think im gonna struggle today

            Spuds, maybe you can change things up a bit. Make a plan for today. If you kow mr spud's buzz will piss you off then arrange it so Mr spuds comes home.... you go out for an hour to do something you enjoy, something "safe". Everybody has days of irritability and it's no cause to drink - which you KNOW will make it worse. Read the toolbox thread and the what's your sobriety plan to load up some ammunition. Hang in there and be good to yourself!! :l
            sigpic
            Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

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              #7
              think im gonna struggle today

              thanks folks. im getting these thoughts together and copying them into a file...... hopefully this will keep me out of mischief
              Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
              Keep passing the open windows

              Comment


                #8
                think im gonna struggle today

                Spuds - please remember how absolutely awful you felt the last time you let the demon get his way, you will be so angry and pissed off with yourself and for what? As Pride says all the obstacles will still be there when you sober up only you will have to deal with them with a stinking hangover. And remember what that feels like!!!!! Tell that little Gremlin in your head to go F*** himself!
                "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                AF - JAN 1st 2010
                NF - May 1996

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                  #9
                  think im gonna struggle today

                  It provides a rationale for rebelling and promises complete happiness. >>

                  And always fails to follow through. Always.
                  AF since July 15, 2010. :applouse:
                  "People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim." —Ann Landers

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                    #10
                    think im gonna struggle today

                    Spuds, you're beautiful, creative, wickedly funny. WHY mess with that combination by being f*&@*d up?
                    sigpic
                    Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                    awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

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                      #11
                      think im gonna struggle today

                      Yes and you will feel so bad tomorrow... resist and resist and rest....
                      xxx Patrice

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                        #12
                        think im gonna struggle today

                        And you will have to start your counter back at zero - after all your hard work!

                        You will have to tell your friends here who love you that you caved, after all their loving support. (That one carries a lot of weight with me and has kept me on the straight and narrow more than once!)

                        Your cravings will be ramped up again after they were beginning to decline.

                        It's not like it's gonna feel great or anything. You may have a micro buzz before you pass out and then you won't even remember anything tomorrow.

                        Stubbed toes, bruises, etc.

                        Acting like hubby. BEING the drunk person you don't like being around.

                        All those calories!!!!

                        Waking up feeling like shit.

                        Letting the f*cking Beast win. Don't give the Beast the power!!
                        Go before that fire there, at the altar of your heart
                        That fire of who you really are and be consumed by it fully
                        Surrender everything into the fire of that love until you are one with that love. You ARE that love.
                        Tilak Pyle Altar of the Heart

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                          #13
                          think im gonna struggle today

                          Hey Spuds - just keep remembering how awful that head is in the morning, the lost hours/day in bed, the nausea, the guilt, the shame ............. need I go on..........

                          Come on my yellow feathered friend you can get through this I know you can because your worth it :l:l:l:l:l
                          Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.

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                            #14
                            think im gonna struggle today

                            PhoenixRising;927266 wrote:
                            You will have to tell your friends here who love you that you caved, after all their loving support. (That one carries a lot of weight with me and has kept me on the straight and narrow more than once!)
                            Good point Phoenix - Spuds how could you do that do us :bat
                            "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                            AF - JAN 1st 2010
                            NF - May 1996

                            Comment


                              #15
                              think im gonna struggle today

                              Spuddles, it YOU we care about. I hope, pray, you'll find yourself. The true, sober, wonderful self. Whatever happens, stay with us, OK??
                              sigpic
                              Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                              awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

                              Comment

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