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    drinking again. why????

    firstly i want to apologise for posting when drinking. im just wondering/ hoping for any advice as to why im drinking cos i dont know why. yes i know the obvious reason is because im an alcoholic and addicted to the dam stuff. i had never tried to give up drinking before, just to moderate. i found mwo on 21 feb2010 and didnt drink for 3 months in which time i had a lot of crap going on and a birthday. i was so pleased to have a sober birthday and really and truly loved it. i loved all the sober time. i really didnt think iwas ever gonna drink again. but i did. since then i have only got a month together and recently only a week. i drank on thursday. i felt i was struggling and came here and got loads of support and thought i was over it ... then i drank.... lots. had 2 days under the duvet gazing at my navel..... well just trying to work it out and wondering what happened. today i woke up, my back wasnt hurting as it has been and i was feeling quite perky. then i decided i wanted to drink... vodka was left from thursday which i drank and i have been to the shop and got more... WTF... i dont think im gonna put it down today, bt has anyone got a clue what the fck.. and why i am doing it. the only thing im thinking is i found out i got a job on thurs.... very very pleased. is it this, ???? why would it be. thats the only thing i can think of that is different this week. pen dog is not well and very swollen with her dying liver stuff.. is it that?????sorry for long post but does anyone have a clue. just been talking to mr spud and he has no clue. any ideas please... i promise i wont post when the vodka gets a bad grip on me...... also soooooo sorry to the peopl that helped me on thursday ........ ducks is puddled x
    Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
    Keep passing the open windows

    #2
    drinking again. why????

    spuds....i dont know what to say except that the demon is in control right now.....try to think of the af time you have had and remember how great you felt....I am here for you and you know how much you are loved here.....we will all help any way we can...
    I love my family more than alcohol.:h
    Live in the Solution....not the problem

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      #3
      drinking again. why????

      Spuds I really wish I knew what to say but I will leave that to the more experienced here, just want to say I'm thinking of you xxxx
      Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.

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        #4
        drinking again. why????

        Alot of us drink out of boredom. I started drinking to numb the pain (mental not physical) pain I was in. When I realized I was completely out of control I drank because I was bored without it. I didn't know what to do sober. So, I found a couple of hobbies. I made myself to do lists and stuck to them, escpecially on the weekend. I am FINALLY 6 days away from one entire year alcohol free. You can do this.
        Forever loved, forever missed Papa Bear

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          #5
          drinking again. why????

          WELL IT LOOKS LIKE I FUCKED MY EX........ WAAAAAAAAAWAT SI WHT .WHAT S THT ZLLOLOLOLLL ZBOUT WHZOT WQHAAAAAAAAAAAA LISTNENMTO ME............. LOISTEWN YO ME...............ME WAAAAAAAA LISTENTO ME...........POOOOPOOOPOOOOPOOOO LISTEN TO ME
          Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
          Keep passing the open windows

          Comment


            #6
            drinking again. why????

            Spuds darling Im so sorry this has happened but there is no point in trying to figure it out while your still drinking. Better to give it some thought when your wearing your sober feathers... :l
            "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
            AF - JAN 1st 2010
            NF - May 1996

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              #7
              drinking again. why????

              Spuds,

              I know it is hard to think clearly, but step away from the Vodka, drink some water, get some rest. We care what happens. You are so strong, you will get past this!

              Everything I need is within me!

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                #8
                drinking again. why????

                Spuddle, honey. Go to sleep. Nothing more complicated than that right now. You have too much going on to deal with more. Sleep. Ask hubby to check on you. Tomorrow we'll talk. It's not the end of the world, it's a dark patch. Tomorrow, OK? PM me, or I will you. You can only fix this when not drinking.
                sigpic
                Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
                awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

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                  #9
                  drinking again. why????

                  I'm afraid just being on this forum is not enough to maintain you sober
                  for the long term.... go to AA and get a sponsor and go thru the big book....

                  I was naive in my own way and trying to re-invent the wheel and find my own
                  way to stay sober..... but in my 2months so far I realized why not listen
                  to these people who use the AA book as a guide? what have I got to lose
                  if I try it THEIR WAY..... you really got nothing to lose.

                  I never thought I could condone aa but it's working for me and I'm one
                  huge alcoholic.......

                  Comment


                    #10
                    drinking again. why????

                    Spuddle, sorry to hear that you are having a hard time.
                    This too will pass if you put down the vodka. As others have said, get some rest, sober up and THEN take a look at it. The why is easy: it's the first drink. If you can find some way to avoid taking the first one, then you can't get drunk.

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                      #11
                      drinking again. why????

                      the sun will come up tomorrow

                      Spuddle...have something to eat, open the window and breath in fresh air, take a couple of asprins with as much water as you can hold. Lay down, close your eyes....tomorrow is another day :h

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                        #12
                        drinking again. why????

                        It may well have been to do with the new job. Subconsciously, your brain may know that being in a full time job will control your drinking within some limits so it was your last chance to get off your head. We are all controlled by our subconscious.

                        I hope you manage to sober up because you don't want to start your brand new job with an unsteady walk, glazed eyes and bad breath. Come on man you can do it.

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                          #13
                          drinking again. why????

                          Hi Spuddle
                          Don't despair, listen to all the positive advice here and yes sleep. Don't beat yourself up
                          It will be ok
                          Take care
                          Patrice

                          Comment


                            #14
                            drinking again. why????

                            hope you are better today ...... its not the end of the world ....... i have been drinking a lot too ...... mum dying of liver cancer and she wont see me because of my alcoholism ..... come on .... i have been easing off with an aim to stop tomorrow 10/8/10 .... i am on nal and under a psychiatrist and CPN ..... also been back to AA and got a new big book AGAIN ..... also spent nearly all my money ... on purpose ... to help me stop ...... spuddleduck ...... join me ..... lets both stop tommorow ........ oh and pompey didnt go out of existance!!! ....... come on lets do this ........ new life can start tomorrow for both of us x
                            I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round .... really love to watch them roll .... no longer riding on the merry-go-round ...... I just had to let it go

                            Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

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