I am ashamed

[FallonsMom]

No I didn't drink still sober but I realized whats keeping me sober right now

it is not because I want to be for me or my daughter.... I am terrified of turning into the people I met at the rehab most were great people but there life scared the shit out of me. Most of them looked so old and tired in the eyes.

I feel bad like I'm judging them or something.

Plus I am scared as hell to go through withdrawl again and I'm scared of that next day feeling you get after a night of over drinking.

Also pure anger is helping me stay sober without Bac because I know my Husband thinks I'm going to mess up. I want to prove him wrong.

I will be glad when the day comes and I can say "I am sober because "I" want to be"


that is all I just needed to vent.

[FallonsMom]

I am ashamed

Physically my body is saying "thank you" but my head is saying "f-U Al made everything feel better"

[greeneyes]

I am ashamed

Whatever works fallonsmom.... Not wanting to be a certain way is only the reverse of a positive. "I want to be a whole and vibrant person" is the same thing as not wanting to be old and tired - just rephrased. "I am a strong person and can achieve this and it doesn't matter what husband thinks". That sort of thing. And you ARE sober because you want to be because you do want those things.

[mario]

I am ashamed

Fallon's Mom for the now keep using them things that are keeping you from drinking,Soon better things will develop for you as the more sobriety you have behind you the better your life will become.

[rubywillow]

I am ashamed

FM, it's a stage right now, and we all go through different ones. This will pass, and you will feel differently at some point. Right now, staying sober is what matters. The rest will come. I'm proud of how you're doing, and it will get better. :hug:

[FallonsMom]

I am ashamed

thanks Ruby

[Pride before Fall]

I am ashamed

my head is saying "f-U Al made everything feel better" >>

That's not your head, that's AL. Say "FU" right back! It makes us feel temporarily numb via neurotoxin. That's it. It doesn't have any effect on feelings at all; they're still there in the morning--with a vengeance!

Just some reminders to combat the misconception that drinking made you "feel better"!

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...hen-23467.html
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...ing-22609.html

Pride

PS: You are doing GREAT. "But for the grace of God go I" is as good a motivation as any, so don't feel guilty.

[FallonsMom]

I am ashamed

Pride before Fall;938384 wrote: my head is saying "f-U Al made everything feel better" >>

That's not your head, that's AL. Say "FU" right back! It makes us feel temporarily numb via neurotoxin. That's it. It doesn't have any effect on feelings at all; they're still there in the morning--with a vengeance!

Just some reminders to combat the misconception that drinking made you "feel better"!

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...hen-23467.html
https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...ing-22609.html

Pride

PS: You are doing GREAT. "But for the grace of God go I" is as good a motivation as any, so don't feel guilty.

THIS IS ON REPEAT IN MY HEAD WHEN I THINK OF THE PEOPLE I MET... :upset: I NEEDED THAT WAKE UP CALL I REALLY DID.

[rubywillow]

I am ashamed

That's why this place is so great, FM, for the wake-up calls and reminders.

[FallonsMom]

I am ashamed

Ruby I keep seeing this women face I can't recall her name but she looked like death when she came in her choice was crack my mind just keeps running on her.

[rubywillow]

I am ashamed

And I think about the meth-addled young woman who spent all her time trying to run me out. She couldn't think about herself, only me.

[FallonsMom]

I am ashamed

rubywillow;938436 wrote: And I think about the meth-addled young woman who spent all her time trying to run me out. She couldn't think about herself, only me.

i met so many young women trying to get off meth I mean like 18/19 years old