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Chink in my armour

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    #1

    Chink in my armour

    Last night my husband and I went to a diner party at a close friends house. There were four couples in total. The food, delicious, conversation stimulating, overall a very successful party. Although there was some very nice wine on hand, I did not drink, not one drop, which did not go unnoticed. Everyone else was drinking, including my husband. No one got obnoxiously drunk, just slightly tipsy, and I have to say I felt, well, left out. Not by the people at the party, but by my condition. And although I made it through the evening without caving in, the experience has dented my confidence.

    "Where is the harm in reserving your drinking for special nights out such as these?"

    "Are you really never going to share a good bottle of red wine with friends over a meal?"

    It got to me, and I am still thinking about it. I really love being sober, but this evening got to me.
    While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
    Benjamin Franklin
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    #2
    Chink in my armour

    Because, tonight, you don't drink. It's not a curse, not something to be ashamed of. 'I don't drink' is a way of life for many people. Tell others to enjoy themselves. No more than vegans, why should we be ashamed? Good job, not caving to others. This is YOUR choice. And a good one.
    sigpic
    Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
    awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

    Comment

      #3
      Chink in my armour

      I hope you can take understanding from the FACT that most, if not all alcoholics have this thinking. Most of us have tried out that thinking. And we have failed. Very few people with drinking problems at the level we have them can ever control it. Not in the house, out of the house, on weekends, switching brands, only drinking on vacation, only drinking while not on vacation, only after 5PM, never alone, only alone, blah blah etc. (maybe with the exception of some of the medications)

      You are not alone. Don't believe the lies, because that's what they are. Don't worry what other people think. As much as I often wind myself way up worrying about what others think, truth is, nobody spends all that much time thinking about me!! Except me!! :H

      You did great. Congratulations on staying sober. Mr. Doggy and I (he is not an alkie) have really restructured our social life. We do activities we enjoy rather than linger over food and beverages, which we used to do quite often. Other people here (retteacher is one) carry on an active social life of dinners with friends who all drink in moderation. That's OK too. Try not to feel the "odd man out." Just figure out if you can enjoy this type of thing sober. If so, great. If not, find something else to do that you enjoy.

      You ROCK for staying sober!

      DG
      Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
      Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

      One day at a time.

      Comment

        #4
        Chink in my armour

        Not tonight i found that for me i cant stay around to long when people start drinking,not even social drinkers as i think that i am sometimes missing out on there buzz, they tend to be on a different level & there jokes & conversation dont feel wright, so be it,i cant drink like them never could and i can live with that & happy to do so.

        drinking on special occasions, for me would only end up me drinking on every occasion & back to square 1.At the end of the day your missing nothing. :-)


        :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

        Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
        I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

        This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

        Comment

          #5
          Chink in my armour

          NT,

          The way I see it is.....Nobody ever wakes up in the morning and says "God I WISH I had drank last night"

          Well DONE on staying sober.
          "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

          AF 10th May 2010
          NF 12th May 2010

          Comment

            #6
            Chink in my armour

            Thank you all for your responses, they are much needed. Last night was the first time since I joined here that I started to question my commitment. I understand that this is to be expected, but by the end of today I was really feeling shaken. Perhaps I have been a little over confident. Still so much to learn.

            You guys are great!!
            While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us.
            Benjamin Franklin

            Comment

              #7
              Chink in my armour

              I know it must have been very hard, NT. But Oney is right.

              You came home a winner for staying sober.
              I'll do whatever it takes
              AF 21/08/2009

              Comment

                #8
                Chink in my armour

                everlasting memories

                not tonight;940415 wrote: Last night my husband and I went to a diner party at a close friends house. There were four couples in total. The food, delicious, conversation stimulating, overall a very successful party. Although there was some very nice wine on hand, I did not drink, not one drop, which did not go unnoticed. Everyone else was drinking, including my husband. No one got obnoxiously drunk, just slightly tipsy, and I have to say I felt, well, left out. Not by the people at the party, but by my condition. And although I made it through the evening without caving in, the experience has dented my confidence.

                "Where is the harm in reserving your drinking for special nights out such as these?"

                "Are you really never going to share a good bottle of red wine with friends over a meal?"

                It got to me, and I am still thinking about it. I really love being sober, but this evening got to me.
                hi Not.2NT.sobriety my dear is not easy.ive been doin this for a long time,but your thread is a good one,the pangs of ,to do,or not to do,many hav made comments,but they treasure,there sobriety,go thro there threads and youll understand what i mean.in drinking and not,theres the old saying,your dammed if you do,but in your mind your smitten if you dont,the battle never ends,your gonna lern a lot over time,remember when you 1st drank,the euforia is the same with sobriety,take your time,lots of water,carry your own container so you dont have to be seen with nothing in your ahnd,if anyone asks if you want somthin,telll them you gotor youve had enuff,your a secial person for just realising where your drinking could take you, wish you well,gyco:thanks::goodjob:

                Comment

                  #9
                  Chink in my armour

                  p s doesnt pay to hav thik fingers hahahaha

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Chink in my armour

                    lol

                    one2many;940448 wrote: NT,

                    The way I see it is.....Nobody ever wakes up in the morning and says "God I WISH I had drank last night"

                    Well DONE on staying sober.
                    lol onester there are somof us hahahah:upset:

                    Comment

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