Blackouts

[VegasGirl]

I Just found out today that I have apparently been having total blackouts the past few months. I mean I absolutely dont recall even having a time loss or anything. I have passed out and lost a few hours before. But total loss of time that I dont remember losing. How comon is this? for drinkers.

[Kimberley]

Blackouts

Hi Vegas,
It sounds like you have a serious problem going on there. The most I have ever 'lost' was a week, but I have heard of people barely recalling anything for several months.

I haven't seen anything you have posted and I see you're new so :welcome:
Do you have a plan at all?

K x

[Doggygirl]

Blackouts

Hi VegasGirl. I think I remember some of your previous posts but in case I've got that wrong and did NOT say hi, :welcome:! This is a good place.

Whether blackouts happen to anyone else or not isn't really important I don't think. (although blacking out seems pretty common at some level). IMO the important thing is that when YOU drink your are blacking out. The only way I know of to stop the black outs is to stop the drinking.

Strength and hope to you,

DG

[K9Lover]

Blackouts

Hi Vegasgirl,
I used to blackout regularly, although I never lost whole days at a time, I'd usually lose 2-3 hours every night, with no recollection of what I did or who I talked to. I'd wake up in the morning trying to piece it all together, walking around the house to try to discover clues as to what I'd been up to the night before. Blackouts are very dangerous because you could be causing harm to yourself or others. Please be careful and let us know what we can do to help you!
K9

[rubywillow]

Blackouts

Blackouts become common as alcoholism progresses. It's really time to make a serious plan, and a commitment, or the progression continues, and gets so much worse. It happened with me. Not having blackouts has been one of the BEST perks of sobriety for me.

[techie]

Blackouts

I've had more blackouts than most power grids. It was due to the increased frequency I decided to detox and rehab!

[Chillgirl]

Blackouts

Vegasgirl - like k9 I was a frequent blackouter, apart from the horrendous shame of not knowing what's happened it scares me what damage I must have been doing to my brain.

And although they say if you remember the sixties, you weren't there, I have to say now looking back, what the hell is the fun in that?!

I hope it reinforces to you why quitting is a good idea.

[mr watcher]

Blackouts

Yes blackouts are fairly common for some drinkers. I have friends that experience that on a regular basis when they drink too much.

[Jewel]

Blackouts

I use to drink till I blacked out.

Also, I found towards the end of my heavy, pretty much daily drinking, I drank I blacked out. I, too, would check things the next day to see who I phoned, facebooked, etc. God, so much time and energy wasted cleaning up the mess of the night/day before. ugh!

I certainly do not miss it! Although I had a couple of days drinking this month, I managed not to black out. That is not progress. It was because the drinking made me feel sick before it got that far. So with over a week under my belt from my last drink, I intend to keep on going..... AF September is definitely my first goal.

It is hard to quit. You have to give it everything you got. You need to love yourself and know you deserve to be a happy, healthy, functioning human being. I send you strength. You are not alone.

[VegasGirl]

Blackouts

At least I know i am not alone on the blacking out. But the worst part is I found out the things that I have done while blacked out. Now I have been scheduling doctors appointments among other things.

[Time to change]

Blackouts

I've had countless blackouts when drinking, the last one on friday just gone where I woke up half dressed with a bleeding ear...and I hadn't even left the house! (I least I don't think I did, thats the scary thing) The worst are when you have been out and you realise anything could have happened to you. I had a works do a while back that I can't remember a massive chunk of, probably around 3 hours, apparently I was the life and soul, chatting to everyone in the club, buying people drinks, making new friends...some of which added me on Facebook the next day and I'm ashamed to say its as if I never met them before...Not even a hint of recognition and there they are asking me about the script I'm writing which I've obviously had an in depth conversation with them about! How awful. I saw Robin williams on the Johnathan Ross Show a few months back and he was talking about his blackouts in his AL days...He said his brain must have been like "Oh, ok so your thinking about shagging a goat right now?....Ok , I'm off, gonna leave you to that.....I'll see you in a few hours!" xx

[spuddleduck]

Blackouts

very regular blackouter.. almost everytime i drank in recent times. awful awful awful. probably one of the main reasons for me seeking help with my drinking. piecing the blacked out time together, not having a clue about what ive talked about, people ive met (yes new 'friends' i havent a clue about). in one of my recent slips i was in a few pubs and i didnt even know i had left the house.. only found out a few days ago. very very scary. time to get help

[Doggygirl]

Blackouts

VegasGirl;947424 wrote: At least I know i am not alone on the blacking out. But the worst part is I found out the things that I have done while blacked out. Now I have been scheduling doctors appointments among other things.

Good that you are seeing the problem and taking action about it. That's all we can do - keep moving forward. Things will get better if you keep on doing the next right thing.

DG

[choice]

Blackouts

Hi Vegas,
I think I've always had memory issues with drinking, as in trying to sequence the events of the evening together. When i was younger this seamed like a game after a party everyone calling each other the next day... Do you remember this??? Oh my god right??? that was after this happened??? Oh no that was before that... ah ha ha.. You were on fire last night!!! whooo hooo!!! I didn't think really THINK much about this. I really thought I was having a good time letting my hair down. REAL SERIOUS BLACKOUTS started happening in my 30's. I honestly didn't know I was even having them. I think I was around a lot of people experiencing them along with me as the phone conversations the next day were I have NO IDEA what happened last night do you??? Facebook has been an embarrassing eye opener... I'd log on days later to someones wall and see all these loving posts I'd left???? harmless??? A few years ago I was working in a retail store and a customer came up to me and knew my name, was so happy to see me and asked me all sorts of questions about all of these personal things in my life. How my paining was going?? if I'd gotten into the gallery I wanted?? I kept staring at her. She realized I had no idea who she was and got offended. I still didn't think much of it. I did feel creepy though. It's now, the past year where I have lost entire evenings and wake up in a panic. Broken dishes??? E-mails??? Phone calls??? texts??? reaching out to EX's who have moved on are married and starting families..??? Telling strangers my secrets... telling other peoples secrets!!!! I think I have a serious problem that I can only solve if I DON'T DRINK. The black outs only use to happen if I'd drank way beyond excess. Now it's only after 3-4 drinks... then I turn into a vampire looking for AL drink so fast and so many, won't go home, cry, yell, throw things,.... I only know this because my boyfriend just recently told me. He said he is scared to drink with me. Wow, I thought I was a happy drunk all this time. Sorry to ramble.

[Cinders]

Blackouts

VegasGirl,

I have posted this before but I will post it again.

I have woken up in bed in my house with a bottle of Vodka under my arms I did not have before.

How did that happen?

It had to have happened this way:

I drank what I had in the house and I blacked out.

I wanted more. (Well duh, I am a drunk, big time and nothing is ever enough, truly, it gets that bad.)

So, in a complete blackout, I have driven down a mountain with many switchbacks, pulled out on to a very busy highway, driven down to the liquor store, purchased the liquor (did they not know I was drunk and completely unable to process information? Not blaming them but I do wonder..) drove back out on that busy highway, drove back up the mountain with many switchbacks and got back home, parked the car, went into the house and drank more.

This happened several times, actually. I am ashamed to admit and sit in horror thinking about it.

I drove by several schools, btw.

Before anyone lambasts me, I do not remember or recall doing this. I am a complete and total alcoholic. There was no thought or premeditation to any of this.

However, I could have killed children, I could have killed mothers driving to pick up their children, I could have hit some unsuspecting person at anytime. Children or not.

At the end of the day, I realized, I am an alcholic. Yes, a bad one. You might not be there "yet."

But, I do have one overriding responsibility in this scenario: I MUST NOT TAKE THE FIRST DRINK. Because after that first drink, "there be dragons."

I work hard at not taking that first drink because if I do, I am responsible because I did.

"yet" has a special meaning in AA, it is "You are Eligible Too."

I know the AA homilies irritate some because they don't like AA but I find much comfort there.

But know one thing. You have recognized today that you have a serious problem with alcohol.

You have an overriding responsibility. YOU MUST NOT TAKE THE FIRST DRINK.

I do not mean to yell with the capitals, I am just trying to emphasize.

We are not at blame for being alcoholics, we are at blame when we take that first drink.

And, one other thing. What you did in the past, is done. Make amends where it makes sense. I posted on that thread. But, figure out what you must do to keep from putting yourself in that place you were. Do not take that first drink.

It is easy but so darned difficult.

Do whatever it takes.

Love,
Cindi