Army thread 14th September

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

you still up honey..??

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

I am here hon, trawling ebay lol.

U ok?

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

just f'ing exhausted..heads spinning..
thank fuck for baclofen..honestly..!!!

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

I bet you are hon, there is nothing easy about bringing a kid up on your own, trying to run a business and battle a demon at the same time...hats off to you x

[rubywillow]

Army thread 14th September

But Jan love, he's WITH you! And I know you both love it!! Takes some adjusting, I'm sure. They learn how to push your buttons. When daughter came to pick hers up on Sunday, AB's (who's 10, going on 30!) and she had 2 big incidents before they left. Poor daughter said 'I've tried to be the perfect mom, and she fights me every step!'. I reminded her of our life before she grew up, and promised I'm always here to give them BOTH a break. They are SO strong-willed, and I'm the mediator. ABs is so calm wih me, but we girls always react to our moms. And Jan, you've both been through a lot, so it takes a while to get back into the daily routine.

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

Thx, it just drives me so crazy at times..I try soo hard to keep my cool, but what really gets me is when he totally ignores me...
...I know he has been thru the seperation as well but to be honest I don't think it's that the reason for his behaviour...!!
I think it's coz where they were very strict with him and when I used to go for visits, it was release time and all the rules had gone..!!
so now at home I think he without doing it intentionally to be bad boy, is acting as if he is free from all rules..
I know I have to estabish that I am the boss etc..
but he is a stubburn head although lovingly so, but he doesn't like not getting his own way or what he wants.....

tomorrow is his birthday and I soo wanted to make a special morning and was gonna make a small choccy cake with smarties and stuff with sparkly candles..
but I am fucked..

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

Fell down the bloody stairs this morning running out for school, did a head first down.. ..
both knees are black & blue and like baloons..
shin has a huge lump, prob bruised the bone, and a huge egg on my forehead as I landed head first on the last step...!
all f'ing painful..
SHIT.....!!!!!

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

You can only do what you can do Jan, bring him to the store 2moro and buy a little cake.
He is still testing his boundries and playing up...there is only one of you and I imagine there was more than one person to answer to at the centre, he needs to know how far he can push you.

It is a HUGE stresser Jan and unfortunately when we get stressed, we are less able to deal with tantrums etc.

I am not going to give you advice, just letting you know that I do understand honxxx

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

ladyjan;959366 wrote: Fell down the bloody stairs this morning running out for school, did a head first down.. ..
both knees are black & blue and like baloons..
shin has a huge lump, prob bruised the bone, and a huge egg on my forehead as I landed head first on the last step...!
all f'ing painful..
SHIT.....!!!!!

God love you hon.....:l

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

one2many;959368 wrote: You can only do what you can do Jan, bring him to the store 2moro and buy a little cake.
He is still testing his boundries and playing up...there is only one of you and I imagine there was more than one person to answer to at the centre, he needs to know how far he can push you.

It is a HUGE stresser Jan and unfortunately when we get stressed, we are less able to deal with tantrums etc.

I am not going to give you advice, just letting you know that I do understand honxxx

Thx darling:l:l
I know you understand 100% especially with 5 of them..!!
it does help soo much being able to talk with you here, very lonely otherwise..and can't let them know just how much stress I'm in..
no weakness is allowed.

and any advice is more than welcome..

[ladyjan]

Army thread 14th September

okies, calmed down a lot..I love talking to you honey..
like a sister thats far away but very close..:l:l:l

gonna go blow baloons and stick his banner up and make a little cake..
see you in the morning..:h:h

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

God, every mother gets stressed no matter how wonderful a mother she thinks she is.

We can only do our best and do what we think is right. Also, with discipline, what works for one child, may not work for another.

I take stuff away from Adam as punishment and that works.
I ground Ava and that works for her.
Mia goes to the naughty step and that works for her.

But if I swapped those punishments around, they would not work....I have to hit them where it hurts (not literally lol)

Adam is into gaming, so he HATES when I take one of them away.

Ava adores being outside and cannot bear being kept in and as for Mia, being taken away from the table etc and placed on the step pisses her off...so it works.

[one2many]

Army thread 14th September

ladyjan;959385 wrote: okies, calmed down a lot..I love talking to you honey..
like a sister thats far away but very close..:l:l:l

gonna go blow baloons and stick his banner up and make a little cake..
see you in the morning..:h:h

see what a good mother you are??? I would have bought a cake if I were so tired and sore from a fall.
You feckin ROCK sister xxx

I will talk to you 2moro and will wish Ollie a happy birthday on IM! xxx

[rubywillow]

Army thread 14th September

Don't know if you all will get this, but I'm going through the same things now with my grands. They ADORE me, I know, and mind me so much better than their every day with their parents, but I don't cut them any slack, and they don't mind. I'm Mimzy, and nothing Poppa and me do is wrong. 10-yr-old gd told me, as I kissed her goodbye Sunday, I just DIDN'T understand how hard it was to live with her mother! Doesn't make me happy, just feel the heartbreak my daughter does when hearing that. She once said she wanted to be the perfect Momma. Doesn't happen. So I take up what is needed. And the 2 of them are SO much alike, it's weird. I'm the buffer, I guess.