I am feeling positive this morning, in fact I feel positive most mornings and then as the day wears on the worries overtake me somewhat.
Impending death is a funny thing, its been a time for me and my mum to put all our differences aside and just get on with the business of loving each other and supporting and most of all respecting each others needs and wishes. She isnt frightened of dying but right now she is suffering and I get the impression that she wishes it would hurry up. Its her birthday on Monday, she will be 75. My brother is coming over today to stay for the weekend. It will be a bit of a break for me too. I am pretty exhausted.
I guess what I am trying to say is that every situation has its merits. I am very grateful for this time I have with my mum. Yesterday we spent just watching telly together. Me tucked up on the sofa with a blanket, her in her chair. It was comfortable and peaceful.
Thanks for letting me just talk, its the only place I can really do that xxx
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