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[Doggygirl]

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Hang in there mishmash. Don't let your addiction convince you this is a reason to drink. It's not. Drinking is always part of the problem and never part of the solution for people like us.

If your ex remarrying is making you sad, I am very sorry. :l What's done is done and the best place for us to focus is on our own futures I think. I hope you can find something positive and fulfilling to do today.

DG

[greeneyes]

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mishmash, I second DG's post. :l

[OverIt2007]

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Hey Girly... Are you feeling better today? Im sorry you are having matters of the heart. Those are the hardest to deal with.

Why is he sending you texts? Is he trying to be your friend or just keep you hanging on?

[Ringing Cedars]

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K9Lover;986763 wrote: You're all so right. I guess I just needed to hear it, even though I already knew it. I just erased him from my phone, even though that won't prevent him from contacting me. I just need to be stronger next time and not reply.

Was thinking about you last night K9. You did the right thing. You deserve much better!

[Choochie]

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Beautiful Sheri - perfect. K9 I hope you're on the mend. We are here for you!

[K9Lover]

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Thanks everyone!
I am on the mend...I just need to let the past go. Easier said than done, but I am working on it.
Mish - I hope you are ok. When I slipped it was around the time my ex-husband (not the ex I referred to earlier) had his new baby. Guess it hit me subconsciously. Be strong, you can do it!
K9

[Mish]

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Will PM soon...am doing very well under the circumstanes...thankfully not on my own strength alone...Hugs XXXX

[sapphire1]

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K9Lover;986704 wrote: And Pride, you are right. The way he talks about his wife, or "it" and "the beast" as he likes to refer to her, is so mean...and he goes on and on about all of her flaws and her looks and her dead personality. It's just so disrespectful to talk about someone like that, and then turn around and go home to them...how does a person do that? You're right, it shows his true colors. And they're not pretty.

K9 sorry for the bluntness of this but: THIS GUY IS A JERK and not worthy of your attention and heartache. You are better than that, you deserve much much more than this man will ever offer you..at best scraps..at worst despair. Move on you are an attractive, intelligent, vibrant lady..go for gold my friend. Love Saffx

[sapphire1]

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Mishmash;987086 wrote: I don't know how to initiate private chat...but pls pm me...in panic as soooooooo understand (ex remarring tomorrow)

Hi Mish,

Geez you've got some toughies coming at you. BUt you know what...you will survive...you will say to yourself..."this too shall pass" and it will LIke day turns to night, like summer becomes autumn, you will be okay. Please dont let this lead you down the slippery slope. YOu have been there before and the view aint too good is it!!!!!! If you want to hang out and chat, let me know and I can PM you, I am in and out all day....stay strong Mish, you are so worth it, love Saffx

[byebyebridgetjones]

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K9Lover;986701 wrote: Thank you everyone. All of your advice has been so helpful. I do think NO contact is for the best. Normally we don't have contact, but it's that one random text out of the blue that gets me going all over again...
In fact he angered me today anyway because his messages started leaning towards sexual inuendos (ok, flat out sex talk) and I told him that I'm way too good to be anyone's "sex toy"...so if that's what he's looking for, then keep looking. He has a wife, and if she doesn't do it for him, well then that's not MY problem. I've just been feeling very disrespected by men lately, as a sex object. I am a smart, funny, independent woman and I deserve to have someone's whole heart and love, not just have them fantasizing about me and then telling me in excruciating detail. I don't need that, it's disrespectful and I'm not going to take it.

Yes. You ARE too good for that. Any of it.
I do hope this man isn't dangling you on a string to serve his own ego ?
It's very important for everyone, but especially folks like us, to separate ourselves from such manipulators.We are in the business of building our self esteem, not breaking it down further. Not to mention how betrayed the wife would feel if she knew about his self indulgent behaviour behind her back.

Give him a wide berth. Sounds like trouble. We're here to learn NEW ways of living, not be dragged back to the old ones. Right ?


You could also send a virus to his computer :H
(Sorry, can't believe I said that)

[Mish]

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Doggygirl;987095 wrote: Hang in there mishmash. Don't let your addiction convince you this is a reason to drink. It's not. Drinking is always part of the problem and never part of the solution for people like us.

If your ex remarrying is making you sad, I am very sorry. :l What's done is done and the best place for us to focus is on our own futures I think. I hope you can find something positive and fulfilling to do today.

DG

Thanks DG...I did let it convince me, but I didn't go overboard. I've actually had a good day and read on FB that my oldest daughter caught the bouquet. Made me laugh as she is a career juggler and has no interest in marriage and all the comments are screamingly funny.
I was sad, but not desolate. We were married 15 years and we were always in love, but our values and lifestyles were very different. It was more of a bittersweet feeling, but it's over now. I'm really happy for him more than anything and wish him every joy that this world can offer him and his bride.
Thanx everyone else for your kind words. And K9, here's a favourite phrase of mine:
A jerk is someone who teaches you something you didn't already know.
:h Mish :h

[rubywillow]

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Think about how he has his home, his options there, and you, hanging on the side. It's not right. If you believe in marriage, as I do, you devote yourself totally to one person. I believe hubs and I would know if there was anyone else in the picture. While you have a connection, it is broken by his commitment, and this is one area in my life I WON'T share, either in marriage or after. I've told Hubs many times over our 40 years, if you don't want to be with me, TELL me, because if I find out, it's Katie bar the door. You may secretly feel a little triumph, it doesn't speak well of him, to not resolve his issues before he comes to you. YOU are the one I 'know' and care about, and don't want you hurt by this. The crude but true old saying that comes to mind is 'shit or get off the pot'. When he works out his problems, on his own, then maybe you can work on your relationship.
Block him, or don't read the texts before you erase them. A little sting, before a lot of heartache.
:huggy to you hon. I know this is so much more common today. Be strong, be you, believe in yourself, and don't search for 'him'. When it's right, it will happen.
Rubes

[Doggygirl]

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Mishmash, I'm so glad to hear everything is OK for you. Bittersweet is OK. Just normal to feel like that. Good for your daughter catching that thing! :H

DG

[mama bear]

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K9 and Mish...ditto what everyone else said
xoxoxo
mama