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    #1

    Question for drug users

    Hi Everyone,
    I have been a member here for quite a while. Actually since 2007. I haven't posted much lately as I have been sober for a couple of months with the help of AA.

    My question concerns my husband. He is an alcoholic as well as myself. To the best of my knowledge, he has not had a drink since I quit. I didn't ask him to quit, it was quite obivious that in order for our marriage to have any chance of survival, we needed to get alcohol out of the mix.

    Occasionally he acts, speaks, generally appears the same as he used to when drinking. I know he hasn't been drinking, because I can smell it a mile away. Don't even try to sell me on the ole Vodka doesn't smell debate, cause to me it most definately does.

    I'm thinking he might be taking something? Perhaps presciption narcotics he has gotten ahold of some how? I have confronted him on several occasions, trying to convince him that if he really isn't on anything, he should be concerned because his behaviour is "off".

    He swears up and down he isn't on anything, but he used to lie to me about alcohol, even though I knew different. I have always told him it is much better to be honest with me, then to be caught in a lie. This is really upsetting me. I hate having to call him a liar. What kind of marriage is based on that? Please, anyone with any insight of any type of illness or affliction that could be making him act this way, please let me know.

    Thank you...

    R2C
    Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. --Confucius
    :h
    Tags: None
    #2
    Question for drug users

    I'm sorry to hear this R2C. Is he on any prescription drugs that you already know of? Has he been to the doctor recently? Maybe a dosage change or something.
    I know from personal experience that my husband definitely acted differently when they gave him Oxycodone (a type of morphine) for his chronic pain. It was awful and bottom line was that he had to get off of it. Our marriage would not have made it.
    However, I don't know how you can prove if he actually is taking something. I hope that somehow you can get to the bottom of this. :h
    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
    ..........
    AF - 7-27-15

    Comment

      #3
      Question for drug users

      R2C...
      I dont know enough about drugs to help here. Pot makes you mellow and sleepy. Coke makes you hyper and "busy"
      Sorry
      I love my family more than alcohol.:h
      Live in the Solution....not the problem

      Comment

        #4
        Question for drug users

        Yeah Nora....Oxy is a BAD drug and highly addictive from what I hear
        I love my family more than alcohol.:h
        Live in the Solution....not the problem

        Comment

          #5
          Question for drug users

          Hi Readytochange. Just a thought, when I gave up first I found myself a bit uncoordinated, physically and verbally, apparently it is some sort of an after affect of alcohol, is there any chance that it is as simple as that with your husband? I used to say words and sentences sort of back to front and I would 'misjudge' my steps sometimes.
          Molly
          Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
          contentedly NF since 8/04/14

          Comment

            #6
            Question for drug users

            R2C, I don't have any words of wisdom, but wanted to just send you some empathy. Mr. Doggy is not alcoholic, but was a very heavy pot smoker and I just thank God every day that we were both able to somehow quit. This must be really frightening. The only thing that comes to mind is the serenity prayer. You can only control you. Whatever it is he is/isn't doing will have to just play out in it's own time and way???

            There is a women's AA meeting I go to that I really like. There are quite a few of us in that meeting where our spouses are also addicts of one form or another. One girl sometimes reads passages from a book clalled "The Language of Letting Go." I dont' know if something like that might be helpful just in living day to day with the uncertainties that are outside your control.

            Hang onto your own sobriety. Without that.......

            :l

            DG
            Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
            Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

            One day at a time.

            Comment

              #7
              Question for drug users

              Thank you everyone for your replies. I don't believe this is any type of withdrawl or post alcohol syndrome. We have been sober for over 2 months. He even wakes up this way, as he did this a.m.

              So I gave it some more thought last nite, and spoke with my AA sponser and have come to the conclusion that I really haven't ever known this man as a sober person. Perhaps this is his personality?

              I will give it some more time and see what comes of it. I forgot how kind you all can be on the boards.
              Bless you all and may you all reach your goals regarding alcohol. There is a certain kind of peace that comes with sobriety.

              R2C
              Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. --Confucius
              :h

              Comment

                #8
                Question for drug users

                Good Luck!!
                I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                Live in the Solution....not the problem

                Comment

                  #9
                  Question for drug users

                  You are right about the peace. It's not that every moment is peaceful (although I will keep aspiring to that! :H) But when I stop the whirlwind in my mind with tools such as the serenity prayer, and realistic, mature thinking, it really does STOP. It's not put temporarily on hold, only to start up again like it was when AL was my "solution" to everything.

                  Best wishes to you and you keep sorting through life sober.

                  DG
                  Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                  Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

                  One day at a time.

                  Comment

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