Today is Day ONE!????

[madmans]

Today is Day ONE!????

well done zach, onwards !!!!

[Grateful]

Today is Day ONE!????

Zach-I am so proud of you!!! Enjoy Church with your family and get a good book at the library! You are such an inspiration. I'll keep checking back in throughout the day.:goodjob:

[tlrgs]

Today is Day ONE!????

TrappedDad;998782 wrote: I am a Christian father who goes to a non-denominational church with my family every sunday, and every sunday in the past would be defined by one word...GUILT. Not that God condemns drinking, but I knew in my heart that He did care about His will for my life and the life I was living was not what he wanted. That is what produced the guilt. Today, I am excited. Today, I get to go to church without that feeling.

Now this may seem small to many of you, and that is ok. Some of you have different beleifs, but the concept remains the same. Whatever your beleif is, whether it is in a higher power, or meditation, or the earth or running or yoga or building wealth or whatever. Each one of those beleif systems has a "will" that if followed makes that system come to life, really come to life! This is what I am celebrating this morning!

This morning I am celebrating in the ability to enjoy and bask in my belief system without my head hung low and a feeling of guilt laid heavily upon my shoulders.

After Church this morning, I will be dealing with alot of boredom. My family doesn't have alot planned. My wife has expressed she would like to chill and that is what we are going to do. I am going to pick a book from our library and read I think...V8 on the rocks in hand...

Love as always...here goes day three,

Zach

AMEN BROTHER from another mother you are doing it buddy

[Doggygirl]

Today is Day ONE!????

Good morning trapped. Just wanted to send you strength and hope on this new AF day! I like how you described your faith in a higher power, and the role of "will" in your life. I too believe in the will of a higher power, and it's all good.

I used to keep a LONG list of things to do. I tried to make sure there were fun/interesting things on my list as well as "chore" type stuff. On days like the one you describe today where you don't have a scheduled activity every moment, it was nice to have a written list to pull out and pick something to do. I was so used to drinking to fill unstructured time, especially on Sundays! When I had a craving and didn't know what to do with myself, that written list came in very handy. In the midst of a craving, I couldn't even think up something like "get out a jigsaw puzzle." :H

Whatever you do, make it an AF one.

DG

[Choochie]

Today is Day ONE!????

Doggy - just had to chime in here. I too did a puzzle recently (something I never do) and couldn't believe how much I "got into" it. Was completely taken away and focused on the damn thing -- so much so I sort of became obsessed and had to force myself to do other things!! Loved it though - highly recommend it. One note - it helps if you can leave the puzzle up for a long time so you can keep going back to it when you have time.

[JackieClaire]

Today is Day ONE!????

Just checking in to see how you're doing. Just keep with your plans,Trap. Someone is always lurking 24/7 if you need to chat.

[airam]

Today is Day ONE!????

Zach, i ll write more tomorrow, I dont have my computer today but wanted to say you are doing an amazing job. Congratulations!

[Brigitte Bardot]

Today is Day ONE!????

Zach, you're doing so great! It's a great feeling to feel proud of yourself again, isn't it? Enjoy the nice lazy Sunday with family, since Monday and work will be coming at you! All the best, I hope you have a great night.

[one2many]

Today is Day ONE!????

Good for you Zach!! You have a GREAT attitude and you are a genuinely nice guy to boot...Well Done xx

[TrappedDad]

Today is Day ONE!????

Church...A fight... And Day Three

So for those of you who have been following my progress know that for the past couple of weeks I have been hiding my drinking from my wife. There had been a day where part of the truth came through, but not entirely, and her response was not what I had expected and had caused me to further excuse myself to dig my hidden drinking to exhaustion. (If you are not familiar with this story, dig in my posts, or PM me, and I will explain)

This morning I arose to a guilt free AL free morning expecting a great day at church only to find myself in a a normal fight with with my wife. Nothing serious...One that involved a Buzz Lightyear shirt that my 4 year old has and that she though was too small and that I though was ok to wear due too the nature of his obsession with the character at this time in his life. This over the next 4 hours of the day turned into a more deaper issue of trust and, well, you can all guess at what happened...TRIGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2PM EST...after church. We went together, the service was a blur and the car ride was a fight for the record books. What was I to do? My normal response was to drink, so here i go, let's get to this, let's forget this journey, let's forget this promise to improve, let's...ALWAYS DO WHAT I ALWAYS DO............OR........

I found myself at a moment of clarity. At a moment of peace, of humility. I began to ask myself questions like, "Did Michelle drive me to be like who I am?" " Does every couple in the world have fights over what their kids should wear, and does one of them then go and get drunk over it?" " Does it make the Buzz Lightyear shirt bigger if I drink?"

Clarity, Peace, Humility. These are the things I am learning through this process of being sober. Is this easy? No! Is this fun? No! Right now, does this seem worth it? No!

Right now it feels sort of like this. I am walking on a HUGE beach where everyone around me is talking about wonderful shells they find and display on shelfs in there house to remind them of the times they experience while thier at the edge of the sea. They spend hours upon hours searching for something to remind them of the time spent, only to bring home but a small 2 inch by 1 inch reminder of a week full of memories.

I liken being sober to that. I am reaching for those small little shells to remind me of those moments.

Love to all!

Zach

[Dewdrop]

Today is Day ONE!????

Hi Trapped,

I have just read this thread as I have had a busy weekend and was unable to log in to MWO. Your post has really inspired me on a couple of levels.

Firstly, through the sheer determination and courage you have managed to muster during the past few days, only you know how difficult this has been but we all have a huge fight on our hands at the start of this journey. It is not easy but after a while it does become easier and the cravings do slow down, their intensity does diminish and you gain the confidence to cope with what life throws at you. On a personal level I had to stop the lies and deceit, and I hear that in your story of going to church; I have now regained my sense of honesty and integrity and I never want to lose that again ? you will feel that too very quickly.

Secondly, I am so heartened and grateful to all the people here on MWO who rallied round and supported you. It really is a testament of how amazing this site and the people on it are, not just to you but to everyone else who logs on and asks for help. We may not always get it right but there is always someone here for someone in need.

Good luck with your journey and hang in there ODAT.

Dewdrop :h

[NoraC]

Today is Day ONE!????

Trap - GOOD FOR YOU!! So many times, I allowed those simple little things to turn me around. How fantastic that you realized it for what it was worth. Keep looking for those shells. They are beautiful. :l

[Grateful]

Today is Day ONE!????

Trap-you are doing so GREAT!!! I agree with Nora....little things like what happened with you today would have triggered me too ... and in the past I would have caved. Look how far you have come in 3 days! Be proud of yourself - as we all are.

[mistysmoma]

Today is Day ONE!????

Hey TD, just got in from work and of course I am checking in to see how you have fared today. Well done and keep being strong. Just be aware of those triggers and tell yourself you will get thru it and think what it will be like if you cave in to them. I frequently remind myself of what I would feel like phyically and emotionally if I take that first one, and it wouldnt stop with one for sure. I want to live..really live, not just breathe in and out, take the good days with the bad ones and know there will be both, drunk or sober. I am choosing{and it IS a choice} sober..ODAAT.Im pulling for you my friend.

[Mish]

Today is Day ONE!????

Zach you are going so well, three days af and in the face of a big trigger too. That's great news. I completely identify with you saying you were able to go to church with a clean conscience. It's true, God does not condemn the use of alcohol but he does condemn drunkeness (in many places) in the Bible. :h
Gyco, God dignifies us with the gift of free will. Zach is using this gift to prove to God that he loves Him and wants to be able to live his life in a way that God approves. That's where peace and contentment come from. :h