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The Party Season

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    #1

    The Party Season

    I was having a hard time confronting my feelings regarding my work's Christmas Party. When it was arranged in July (Yep! You read it right) I was all up for it. I was going to take my car and spend an hour or two attacking the buffet before retiring early.
    It's taking place in a hotel, with a free bar and everything taken care of and there was a bit of me that resented the fact that I wasn't able to fully take advantage of my employer's generosity, even up to the point where I was thinking about just joining in and doing what everyone else was doing. I've been sober for many months and perhaps it's time to give myself another chance?
    Well, as we all know, that's the kind of thinking that get drinkers like me into all sorts of trouble. Even after all this time, my mind still isn't ready to completely accept the obvious.
    I don't want to drink.
    I've pulled myself out of a hole and I'm not going to slide back in. I really don't understand why I felt it would be OK to risk my sobriety, but the fact is that I did, so I'm not going to go. I'm going to spend that day doing something I love. I'm going up a mountain. I know that I'll have a much better time doing that and I'll be continuing my journey in a healthy way.
    I'm annoyed at myself, but I'm happy with my decision.
    Thanks Friends :l
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    #2
    The Party Season

    Good stuff Popeye.

    We don't need to drink. It's all a lie. The AF life rock's, and it is truly magical.

    Best wishes.

    'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

    Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

    Comment

      #3
      The Party Season

      Popeye,
      Your are right, the wrong thinking will get you in trouble every time. A thought.....it is never a good idea to drink alcohol at any work event, because you are still at work.

      I love your plan to go up a mountain.
      Formerly known as redhibiscus

      Comment

        #4
        The Party Season

        Popeye I so relate to your story.

        I have been invited to 2 Christmas parties: one at work all expenses paid, hotel for the night, free booze etc and the other with a bunch of girlfriends who meet up every year and get smashed (no way to paint it pretty). When I started out I felt that I?d worry about this nearer the time just plod on ODAT, right? Well the time is fast approaching and bookings have been made etc.

        I thought I was pretty strong sober wise and do feel very determined and in control but whenever I?ve thought about these nights out I?ve had a slight panic. The work one starts at 2pm with cocktails and will end in the early/late hours of the next morning. The girls one is a party night and we are all meeting at 3pm at the hotel to get ready and each have to bring a couple of bottles of wine for a giggle in our rooms. I?ve no idea when or how this one will end.

        I made a decision at the weekend and told each of them this morning that I was booked at the other night and had made a mistake with the dates so I won?t be going to either. I can?t put myself in jeopardy this Christmas and each night has huge potential to do that. So I?ll pay for any booking cancellations and happily stay home this year.

        Thanks Popeye you?ve made me feel so much better about my decision.

        Dewdrop :h
        Enjoy today - there will be no other one quite like it....

        Comment

          #5
          The Party Season

          Popeye - Im so glad you are not going!
          Why would we want to spend an evening in the company of people who's sole intention is to drink as much as possible, make complete arses of themselves and feel like shit the day after?! It is a form of temporary insanity and you are way way beyond that behaviour. I hope you dont mind me attaching the post below which you made recently as a reminder.......

          I first came here about four years ago, just after my grand-daughter was born.
          I'd been drinking solidly and at every possible opportunity for about twenty years. I'd tried inumerable times to stop but only made it two or three days and eventually I reached a point where I didn't care about anything or anyone. I regularly blacked out and woke up in a pool of vomit with the place a mess and my knuckles burst wondering what the hell had happened. I drank heavily most nights and never missed my work, so I guessed I was doing OK.
          It was a Sunday morning and I Googled 'alcoholic' and this place popped up. For about a year after I was drinking and quitting on a weekly basis, just kidding myself on really. Then one day it just clicked. I logged in to say that once more I'd caved and a very good friend who's not on much any more, but who I keep in touch with gave me a good telling off and told me to stop behaving like a child and just do it.
          I stopped for about nine months then started again, believing myself to be 'cured' and I was alright for a bit, but then my world caved in and I was right back at the bottom again.
          It could have went either way then, but with the help of this place, my doctor and some serious effort and determination, I've managed to stay sober for a year and nine months.
          It's taken a whole shift in thought and a change of lifestyle and attitude, and while life still provides all the usual worries and problems, I'm in a much better place to be able to deal with them. For a while, I really didn't care if I lived or died, but that's changed and I honestly look forward to every day and everything that happens, good or bad.
          I'm in charge of me and I'm enjoying getting to know myself without being drunk.
          "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
          AF - JAN 1st 2010
          NF - May 1996

          Comment

            #6
            The Party Season

            Hi Dewdrop - x posts!
            I think we should make this the MWO "alternative" Christmas Party Thread where we can all come and have a AF good time
            "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
            AF - JAN 1st 2010
            NF - May 1996

            Comment

              #7
              The Party Season

              Chillgirl;1012659 wrote: Hi Dewdrop - x posts!
              I think we should make this the MWO "alternative" Christmas Party Thread where we can all come and have a AF good time
              Great, but what to wear?

              'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

              Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

              Comment

                #8
                The Party Season

                Guitarista;1012660 wrote: Great, but what to wear?
                your santa swimming trunks of course Mr G
                "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer ."
                AF - JAN 1st 2010
                NF - May 1996

                Comment

                  #9
                  The Party Season

                  Popeye--

                  This really can be a difficult time, even if we have significant AF time. All the glamour surrounding the holidays, and booze is a huge part of it.

                  Dew- the decision you've made must be a very hard one, especially the night out with your gf's. But I think if we truly want to get sober and stay sober, we have to be honest and make the right choices, esp early on in our sobriety. I passed on quite a few special events when I first quit drinking, because honestly every other time I tried to go and just drink less, it just didn't work!

                  As time goes on, it does get easier. Because we KNOW. Like G said--sobriety is so much better than drunk and hungover and everything else that goes with it. Besides, shouldn't we focus on what Christmas is really all about! :h
                  _______________
                  NF since June 1, 2008
                  AF since September 28, 2008
                  DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
                  _____________
                  :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
                  5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
                  _______________
                  The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    The Party Season

                    Popeye and Dewdrop, Bravo to you for thinking this through ahead of time! The alcoholc mind is a tricky one for sure! I so appreciate what AA says, cunning and baffling it is for sure! I chose not to attend any parties for nearly two years after going AF. This year we will be attending a few parties, but all are very low key events. I still have my "exit plan" should I start feeling compromised in any way.

                    I keep thinking about the idea he Free Booze is somehow a gift or a reward???? To an alcoholic like me, free booze is a Free Journey into the Hell of Addiction. I hope that both of you plan something that will truly be enjoyable and treat yourselves!!!

                    xxx Kate
                    A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes~Cinderella

                    AF 12/6/2007

                    Comment

                      #11
                      The Party Season

                      I too have turned down several events/get togethers that might be tempting for me. I even told an old girlfriend/drinking buddy who contacted me after us not communicating for a while that I was on the wagon and could not be around her. Honestly, I would walk away from any relationship, party, friend that I felt was a threat to my sobriety. I just can't get into that rut again. To me no one - even a good friend, is worth the risk. Even if it means being a hermit for a good while, I plan to stick with whatever will work to keep me sober. And, really, I'm enjoying the solitude.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        The Party Season

                        This is a great thread! I've gotta to go and get ready for work but I'll be back tonight to share a Christmas work party from hell. It was the turning point for me that really showed me I had a problem. I still cringe at the thought of it:upset:. Thanks for starting this thread Pops! expat xxx

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                          #13
                          The Party Season

                          I also won't be partaking in my xmas party. To be honest, I don't think I was going to go anyway. It would certainly be too soon to test myself though.
                          I am however thinking ahead to xmas day. Wondering if I can chance a glass of wine with xmas dinner. I think I already know the answer to that.

                          On a side note: For the past few days I've been having flashbacks to so many times when I was drinking in the past. Going back years, not just next day flashbacks. I was recalling in my head a phone conversation I had with my brother about his wife a few years back. I was trying to recall where I was when that conversation took place and then I rememberd, oh yes.. at the kitchen table with a bottle of wine in front of me.

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                            #14
                            The Party Season

                            great decisions popeye and dew. a free bar is lethal..... though some people can just have a couple i know i couldnt. my last works xmas do was awful.... not that i can actually remember... i thought i was charming and funny ha ha ha. i was reminded for months afterwards about the falling over drunk that was actually there. AWFUL. im going to this years party... a new workplace and most people are driving as its not in walking distance so i know i wont be tempted. much more sensible and im sure it will be much more fun. its a dangerous time coming up for us.
                            Today is the tomorrow i worried about yesterday and it turned out fine
                            Keep passing the open windows

                            Comment

                              #15
                              The Party Season

                              hi pops,i have to say very admiring,it only takes one,and it could be ones dismise,i to have a christmas party this saturday,i dont drink at special functions,speccially work related,even tho im not totaally without,i do have a greater respect for what i do,some can manage it,and some fall like a rock from a mountain side,ive been there and it is no party , after wards hav a wonderful christmas gyco

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