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Just Two Glasses

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    #16
    Just Two Glasses

    Thanks for the insightful and supportive responses everyone. I do think it's important to see how drinking effects us, regardless of how much we drink.

    As for Hubby's kisses...Sometimes I turn my head and hug him. Sometimes I nestle my face into his neck. Sometimes I let him kiss me, and just hope he doesn't notice or care. He is a two drink a day guy, and doesn't object to my drinking two drinks. But he does think it's unhealthy for me to have the first one before he gets home, and to do so makes me feel ashamed.

    Peacenik, it's always nice to be told "lighten up on yourself", but in this case I disagree. If I don't look closely and seriously at my behavior, I won't change it. And to be clear, two glasses is a limit I used to exceed fairly often. I did six months AF, from Feb. to August. Then I started testing the waters of occasional drinking. But that was supposed to be "at social events" or "out to dinner with Hubby"...not on a school night, cooking dinner and helping the kids with homework. This is what we all call the "slippery slope" and I see it in front of me.

    So yes, it will be an AF Tuesday for me! I will be interested to see how bad the cravings are at 5:00 tonight. How many AF days or weeks or months or years do most people find it takes to stop having cravings?
    "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

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      #17
      Just Two Glasses

      Sunbeam;1018791 wrote:

      I had a recent thought to share about being an alcoholic: I could never quite accept that label because I don't drink much, I just struggle like you. But I recently read something about addiction: it's something you can't do without, or you think about it a lot if you do. I definitely do have an addition to alcohol.
      Me too, Sunbeam. Me too.
      "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

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        #18
        Just Two Glasses

        Sara - I am a bit late on this, but thank you so much for your post. I am exactly like you. I have found that there is no way in hell I can moderate ever. Being sober this past 37 days has been amazing. I, like you, didn't get hammered on wine generally, but my relationship with it was the problem. I had rules, that I never adhered to. I hid my drinking, brushed my teeth, hid the bottles in the recycle bin....on and on. I just thought it better to stop. Reading your post totally reminded me of what my relationship with booze was and is no longer. It made be weep a little, then be more resolved to never touch a glass again. I just can't. Thanks again. Good luck to you - you are a strong woman.
        February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

        When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

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          #19
          Just Two Glasses

          Thank you for your honesty and thoughts. I struggle with the idea of whether or not I can mod. I think I can but I'm not there yet. I admire your courage.

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            #20
            Just Two Glasses

            Good post Sara. sounds like you are looking inward and discovering, learning more about yourself. I learned and discovered a bit more about me because of your post.

            Meechie

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