jolly time of year?

[looking for peace]

Anyone else feel stressed, sad, cold, overwhelmed, etc. this time of year? I'm just in a crappy mood and can't seem to get out of it. I know what I would really like to do to get a temporary relief... but am trying hard not to.

I just feel stressed with obligations and family expectations. I need to do alot of xmas preparation and have 2 cars that are not working right now. The weather isn't cooperating. I know I'm just complaining, but I have to put a happy face on at home. My husband does not tolerate any negativity.

But I think the thing that got to me the most today was getting an xmas card in the mail from an old,not very close friend, from the last city we lived in. There she was in a gorgeous picture taken with her family at her third child's wedding... 3 grandchildren in the mix. Everyone looking so happy and beautiful. They are from wonderfully respected large family with a very successful family business for generations. They have a large circle of friends and are very respected in the community. They've lived there for ages. That pang of jealousy and sadness hit. I moved to my 4th city 2 years ago, leaving behind scattered circles of aquaintances. A small amount of family scattered about the US. An autistic child, another son leaving for college soon.... could I ever even hope for one grandchild. ?

Why can't I be happy with what I have???? Is it this time of year or is it me??? I hate being this way. What happened to the joy for life I had in the first 2 decades of my life? This season just seems to bring it out the sadness more in me. Thank you guys for being out there to listen:thanks:

[looking for peace]

jolly time of year?

Sheri, Thanks so much for the encouragement and advice. I think I do tend to compare my circumstances to others too much. If I am going to do that anyway, I should start comparing my circumstances to the many who are worse off than me and feel grateful for all of my blessings.

[KateH1]

jolly time of year?

It is so interesting that you started this thread, LfP, as this is a topic that we are seeing here at MWO quite a bit this time of year. I agree with Sheri, we never know the trials that others are dealing with, no matter how great their life might appear. On the other hand there are people that are far worse off than others, that go unoticed.

Here is something to think about. Today I ran into a long time neighbor of mine. He has suffered for over 35 years with a very crippling form of MS. He has been confined to a wheelchair for over 30 years and today he has no use of his arms or legs. He requires daily care just to do what most of us take for granted, like getting in and out of bed, and feeding himself. With his arms strapped to his electric wheelchair he does get around during the daytime, often going outside to sit in the sun. On top of this, his daughter also has a condo here. She is 37 and suffers from the same horrible strain of MS, she too is confined to a wheelchair. Yet, every time I see either or both of these remarkable people, they always have a smile and something interesting to share. Today, for the first time in the 16 years that I have known this neighbor, he said to me, if I only had two wishes for Christmas, the first would be that I could take away this wicked disease from my wonderful daughter and the second would be that I could have the use of my hands and arms. He was not at all sorrowful when he said this, he was just matter of fact and wishful! Once again I am reminded that I need to remain in a state of gratitude for all that I have, health being so basic and so important. It makes me think about "Not Sweating the Small Stuff!" So much of what we stress out about is truly "small stuff". And...whether it is the holiday season or any other time of the year, to be grateful for the things that we take for granted!!

I wish you and all, peace and joy.....!
Kate

[gyco]

jolly time of year?

expectations

looking for peace;1022627 wrote: Anyone else feel stressed, sad, cold, overwhelmed, etc. this time of year? I'm just in a crappy mood and can't seem to get out of it. I know what I would really like to do to get a temporary relief... but am trying hard not to.

I just feel stressed with obligations and family expectations. I need to do alot of xmas preparation and have 2 cars that are not working right now. The weather isn't cooperating. I know I'm just complaining, but I have to put a happy face on at home. My husband does not tolerate any negativity.

But I think the thing that got to me the most today was getting an xmas card in the mail from an old,not very close friend, from the last city we lived in. There she was in a gorgeous picture taken with her family at her third child's wedding... 3 grandchildren in the mix. Everyone looking so happy and beautiful. They are from wonderfully respected large family with a very successful family business for generations. They have a large circle of friends and are very respected in the community. They've lived there for ages. That pang of jealousy and sadness hit. I moved to my 4th city 2 years ago, leaving behind scattered circles of aquaintances. A small amount of family scattered about the US. An autistic child, another son leaving for college soon.... could I ever even hope for one grandchild. ?

Why can't I be happy with what I have???? Is it this time of year or is it me??? I hate being this way. What happened to the joy for life I had in the first 2 decades of my life? This season just seems to bring it out the sadness more in me. Thank you guys for being out there to listen:thanks:

hi peace,good thread.is life all about pleasing everyone else,it is bread into many of us,its called feeling guilty,:upset:many of the others in this world ? no how to pull our strings,ive lerned over the last severall years,many of us have to start doing for us, and yes it mite seem selfish, :upset: oops,it does take many years to learn this new skill,:thanks::goodjob:gyco

[looking for peace]

jolly time of year?

Hi Kate, Thank you for that story about your neighbor. There really are so many people out there that are worse off than many of us and this is just another reminder. Most of us here still manage to have some level of health, and we are tossing it away, when this dear man and his daughter don't have it through no fault of their own. Many blessings to you and your neighbor... if only some wishes came true.

[KateH1]

jolly time of year?

Hi Peace,
I hope that sharing this story did not in any way make it appear that I am minimizing your struggles and or sadness at the moment. Indeed that was not my intention Our struggles and heartbreaks, along with disappointments and sadness are all very valid. No less than my neighbor!

But, what running into my neighbor made me think of was that so often, my struggles and sadness comes from temporary and even at times self imposed issues, such as worrying too much about pleasing others, or being perfect at my job, or how I will get a water heater replaced! All of which are temporary situations that will get resolved! For me, keeping perspective really helps me to stay content in most situations! And....seeing a situation that is not temporary one that is so devistating really put my head back on straight!!

Wishing you Joy and Peace!!
xx Kate

[sunshine_gg]

jolly time of year?

Thank you Kate. That was a very timely reminder (for me).

Hope you are feeling a bit better LFP :l