The 30 somethings thread.

[choice]

The 30 somethings thread.

hmmm, that's strange i don't know why my post was repeated again

That's great about your son's victory in the hockey tournament Hill. My father is a hockey player from Canada so I grew up around a rink he still plays at the age of 67. I just love the sound of skates on the ice. He's an alcoholic too who stopped drinking for about 20 years but now drinks again. In moderation I suspect but I've scene him drunk a few times at weddings and he probably would be better off not getting himself like that as he can become "that drunk guy".... I never saw that as a kid. I think it would have embarrassed me, because I wouldn't have understood why he was acting stupid.

[clthorson75]

The 30 somethings thread.

Great day to everyone! Congrats Hill on your son's tourney win. Hi Choice! Nice to see you here. Hill living in the hockey state of minnesota i love hockey! Hockey is such a commitment from the player to there family and quite expensive at times, but well worth it for the exercise and self-confidence your son is getting from it. Hope everyone is doing well!

Thors

[hillsidetime]

The 30 somethings thread.

Good morning everyone who visits, I hope you are well. Choice and Thors, it's cool that hockey has been a part of your lives as well.

Choice, it's interesting that your dad had 20 years undre his belt, and he went back to drinking. Is this confusing for you?
Thors, I worked a few summers in Minnesota, a lovely outdoors state indeed!

Well, I have to say my anxiety level is rising a little. This weekend, is the annual men's hockey tournament that I run and play in. Last year, it was at this tournament, that I drank so much, and did some really really dumb things, bad decisions, that left me within an inch of losing my marriage, my ability to live with my kids, what was left of my dignity (after other stupid things I did drunk). I know that I will not drink, that is not the issue. It is all the feelings, memories, getting dug up, and they are coming strong. It is kind of like feeling like I was in rock bottom again. Thank goodness I am sober, and feel great about that. I am so glad I have turned my life around. The good thing, is that I will also play much better sober, maybe even snipe a goal!

Take care everyone,
Hill

[choice]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi guys I hope everyone is having a good day.

It is confusing that my Dad is a drinker now. When he proposed to his second wife is when he took his first sip of champagne with her to celebrate. That was about 10 years ago. Over the past decade I hadn't really thought much about it and kinda thought maybe he never was an alcoholic just a problem drinker.. He needed to stop before because he was going to loose my mom and us kids... He spent a night in jail because of a DUI and after that just didn't drink anymore because he also suffered terrible hangovers and felt it was holding him back from making the money he wanted to make. My stepmother is a heavy drinker who I think in the past year has really hit it hard with the drink. She lost both her parents in one year. They seam to be drinking buddies now and I think they are "okay" but since I've stopped drinking I'm still trying to figure out what other peoples' drinking means to me.

Wow Hill,
I bet your tournament is going to bring so many new self discoveries into light. I'm so glad you are sober now. Look how far you've come in a year. I am amazed at how much we can truly recover and change our lives. Sometimes it feels like a miracle. Good luck! I hope you score a goal. I love scoring goals, I didn't play ice hockey but I played field hockey and lacrosse. I just loved playing team sports. I think that's why I am a huge fan of group fitness now. If I get tired I can't stop and have to keep up with the group. Symbolically I just don't want to let my team down.

[hillsidetime]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi Choice, now I understand about your father. His new wife may have influenced him a bit with the drink, I hope she is nice to him. Too bad that she is hitting the drink hard. After a loss, it does happen often. Hopefully she, and he, hit the breaks a bit with things. At our age, it is hard to give our parents advice though, isn't it.

It is interesting for sure, how we can change our lives. Sometimes I still re-live my bad drinkin screw up, mistakes, and think about how they changed my life. I can't wait until the day, when I stop doing that. I look forward to this weekend, I will try to score one for you! Field hockey and lacrosse, you must be quite the athlete.

Have a great day.
Hill

[marriedgirl29]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hello everyone,

Sounds like everyone is having a lot going on!

My best drinking/using friend is having a really hard time she is in jail for Domestic Assault and vandalism(she went over to her boyfriend's house, he was kicking her out and she was trying to get her stuff and he locked her out, so she was in a drunk/speed fueled rage and broke out a bunch of his garage windows and went generally crazy and it wasn't the first time.) I talked to her from jail and pretty much determined she is completely lying to herself and doesn't accept any responsibility, I guess she is afraid to look at her part. It makes me sooooo grateful that I am sober today....

Also, it makes me see how EVERYONE knew I had a problem but ME. I was the last to know because I was lying to myself and telling myself I was pulling it off and I WASN'T!!! Everyone knew!! Just because they are afraid to tell you to your face doesn't mean you are pulling it off. Everyone around my friend knows she has a problem- her mom is calling me trying to see what to do. She just can't believe any of this is her fault.

Glad everyone is staying sober I have 30 days on Friday!

[clthorson75]

The 30 somethings thread.

marriedgirl29;1053018 wrote: Hello everyone,

Sounds like everyone is having a lot going on!

My best drinking/using friend is having a really hard time she is in jail for Domestic Assault and vandalism(she went over to her boyfriend's house, he was kicking her out and she was trying to get her stuff and he locked her out, so she was in a drunk/speed fueled rage and broke out a bunch of his garage windows and went generally crazy and it wasn't the first time.) I talked to her from jail and pretty much determined she is completely lying to herself and doesn't accept any responsibility, I guess she is afraid to look at her part. It makes me sooooo grateful that I am sober today....

Also, it makes me see how EVERYONE knew I had a problem but ME. I was the last to know because I was lying to myself and telling myself I was pulling it off and I WASN'T!!! Everyone knew!! Just because they are afraid to tell you to your face doesn't mean you are pulling it off. Everyone around my friend knows she has a problem- her mom is calling me trying to see what to do. She just can't believe any of this is her fault.

Glad everyone is staying sober I have 30 days on Friday!

Hi married! Isn't it crazy what addiction does to a person. Clouds our judgement and turns really sweet at heart people into near monsters. The blame game and pointing fingers at others instead of yourself is something alot of addicts have to learn the hard to start to take the responsibility for actions upon ourselves. Praying she sees the light!

Thors

[hillsidetime]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi everyone, I hope your week is going well.

Mg29, your friend is lucky that she has a friend like you who is there to help, and who is there for her regardless. I hope that she is doing OK. You make a great point about how we all felt that we were pulling it off - we were not. I thought I was too, what a sham. At least now the cat is out of the bag, we know the truth, and we can try to make our lives better each day.

Thors, great point. Addiction certainly clouds our judgement, and sets us up for such bad decisions. I find that it was so hard, to get to the point, where I could truly grasp the situation, so that I could finally take responsibility. Alcohol is so ingrained in our culture, it is complex.

Last night, at the final hockey scrimmage night before our big tournament, the guys presented me with a new composite stick as a thank you for my work. It was cut to my height, taped, ready to go. It made me so happy. That was exactly what I needed. Life is funny. I scored a goal with it during our scrimmage. I have never owned a nice stick like this, it is awesome. This sort of takes the sting out of some of the memories and thoughts that are accomanying me along this week, and this weekend.

Hill

[hillsidetime]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi everyone, I hope you are well. It is the morning of, I am off for my hockey tournament. A case of club soda, and a case of gatorade in the car. Have a great weekend,
Hill

[Cassia]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi all-

Good to see everyone and sorry for not dropping in for a while!

Choice - my dad also went back to the booze after 15 years of so sober. He hit it pretty hard for another 15, not easy to watch. Lost everyone, destroyed lives etc. He has been sober now for a while...don't know if that's down to lack of cash or determination. Anyway...I doesn't seem like your dad is going down that route which is cool!

Married - there are only two people in my life who think I have a problem with drink, my dad and my husband. Everyone else says I ain't so bad but I think it is a uk culture thing. If I lived in the states, someone would have dragged my ass to rehab ages ago! So don't be too hard on yourself. You are being proactive about it now and that's the important thing!

Hola peeps!

Xx

[KingPin]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi. I will be turning 34 in just over a weeks time and it seems like yesterday since I was dreading turning 30. Wow.

I'm still trying to clear up the mess I have made of life in the last few years, and sincerely hope never to be repeating that comment in the 40 somethings thread!

Marriedgirl, one of the things that I also find hard to get to grips with in how everyone could have known I had a problem but me. Don't get me wrong, I knew that I drank to excess, but I just never thought to test that it was of my own free will... don't know why?

Even when I could see that I was (rapidly) falling apart both mentally and physically, I somehow managed to attribute the warning signs to anything else like poor diet or self-diagnosed medical illnesses that seemed to fit my symptoms just enough.

I am not ordinarily that dense, and weird thing is that I could probably have seen the truth in anyone else. Guess I was just sailing down that little Egyptian river some may have heard of... what's it called??

Anyway, glad I found this forum and glad to see this thread. I think us 'not quite youngsters not quite oldsers' should stick together. Too young to contemplate the past without seeing a future, but too old to contemplate the future without seeing a past.

KingPin

:new:

[medic]

The 30 somethings thread.

Hi 30s. Nice to know there are others around my age here with the same condition, though, not to discredit the seriousness of our elders's condition, the younger the more sad I suppose.

I just turned 36 and have been on a downward slope since I hit my mid-thirties. I drink most days even though I don't have the money for it. Food is not my priority.

I was listening to the radio yesterday and hearing all these horror stories about parents in their 30s not having enough money to buy food for their children and I couldn't help wondering if any of them had a drinking problem. Maybe I'm just projecting. Times are tough out there even for the tee's.

Maybe one day I will learn how to stop drinking this shit we call a solution.

x