I am pretty sure this proves it

[ATLThrash]

Friday evening my hubby and I went out for dinner. I had saved my calories all week (I am dieting big time) to eat out-- and then I even had something fairly healthy (lean steak, spinach -- not creamed, and baked sweet potato). In the past when I have had steak I have usually had a martini-- I have steak rarely so it is a "treat". Had my one martini-- felt fine but once again proved that I can't drink. One drink should not make a person a nut-- but when I went to sleep--could not sleep, woke up so many times, felt guilt, shame etc and then the next day was filled with anxiety. Over one lousy drink. I acted fine, no issues, but at bedtime and then the next day I was wracked with anxiety. It is almost likethe alcohol has somehting in it that will make me feel that way 100% of the time now no matter if I drink like mad or drink one drink. After feeling like garbage all weekend-- I am just going to resolve to stay away-- I CAN moderate but I WILL feel like a nutcase. Thanks for listening!

[rubywillow]

I am pretty sure this proves it

ATL, look at it as a good thing. Don't let it ruin a good evening, just a VERY good lesson. It sounds like you've built a great security system in your mind to help protect you. Be proud of yourself.

[ATLThrash]

I am pretty sure this proves it

well, i guess that I do wonder though-- even though I can moderate and no one would think one drink was bad (except my judgmental mother and Baptist grandma)-- what is it that makes me feel like absolute mental garbage when I have it? That is one thing that just really scares me-- that this drug has sucha hold that one drink will make me nuts.

[mylife]

I am pretty sure this proves it

You seem to have a mental warning system, so it's a good idea to pay attention to it! If one drink makes you nuts, then it is probably a good idea to avoid it.

[rubywillow]

I am pretty sure this proves it

ATL, a lot of it could be the judgement you mentioned. The other day I saw someone on TV say 'I'm 39 years old! Why can my mother still push my buttons?" His wife replied, "Because she installed them." That's a VERY true thing for me. And it may be an issue you need to think about to understand.

[DLSUM]

I am pretty sure this proves it

Along these same lines, I know someone who had 3 weeks sobriety under her belt, then drank 5 whiskey cokes one night. Any advice I can give her to make her feel better? I told her to focus on the achievements and just move on from the slip-ups... is that helpful?

[rubywillow]

I am pretty sure this proves it

That's the best, D, because we can't change the past. We have to learn from it, or we're doomed to repeat it. We don't want to throw out everything because of a mistake. You're a good friend.

[ATLThrash]

I am pretty sure this proves it

Thanks all-- I am glad I have the warning I guess-- just sad that it had to get to this point.

[DLSUM]

I am pretty sure this proves it

Hope we helped ATL. Thanks Ruby. For someone in that (our) position, I think you have to give someone (yourself) credit when you succeed. A lot of people with alcohol issues also suffer depression so beating up on them (yourself) is NOT helpful.

[rubywillow]

I am pretty sure this proves it

Right. And for those around us, that's very hard. They get frustrated too, and think a scolding will help. That's the beauty of this place. Real people who understand.

[coalfire]

I am pretty sure this proves it

'I'm 39 years old! Why can my mother still push my buttons?" His wife replied, "Because she installed them." That's a VERY true thing for me. And it may be an issue you need to think about to understand.
__________________
Never heard this one before. Absolutely priceless! Im not getting on too well with mine at the moment but I think I will go and ring her. I have no choice now after reading this! Thanks Ruby.

[Sarasmiles]

I am pretty sure this proves it

ALT: I have a similar response to having one or two drinks. It is almost as if I have a psychosomatic hangover. I think that after all the years I've spent struggling with the question of whether or not I can drink, and all the times I've decided and proclaimed that I'm going to abstain, I feel guilty even if I only have one drink. It brings up all the feelings I've had about alcohol and how bad it is for me. Like you, I can moderate pretty reliably. But I no longer enjoy alcohol. Well, I guess I enjoy it in the moment, but the anxiety, guilt and depression associated with it outweigh the "fun".

[ATLThrash]

I am pretty sure this proves it

If I only could remember how bad I feel after-- but you are right -- in the moment it feels okay! Kind of liek my diet-- feels great to be thin but in the midst of eating that is pretty cool too!