Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

[ThisWayOut]

Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

I found when I started drinking again it was fun and exciting. Problem is/was that it starts progressing again over time and all the bad things creep back into your life. Regrets, embarrassment, feeling sick the next day, and much worse... Then you have to start all over again - painful to say the least. So yes, good idea to remember the bad parts - think back to all those terrible times when you were a slave to AL. After time we can/do forget, if we don't talk about it. So, really good post. TWO

[jane jane]

Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

I had absolutely no long-term success using the "remembering what actually happened" technique; recalling my appalling lapses only made me feel sad, hopeless, and hardly worth saving.

Positive self-reinforcement does more for me. This week, for example: I went to a Mardi Gras brunch where the champagne and Bloody Marys were flowing, and had...sparkling mineral water! I came home, and instead of falling into bed for a midday nap (as I would have after drinking) I painted my bathroom!

Last night I went to a nightclub to hear a jazz trio, with two (drinking, but not alcoholic) female friends (my husband's out of town) and ordered two---plain tonics with twist of lime!

GOD, the pride I feel on this Friday is like manna from Heaven---and (I pray) this feeling of pride will be the "carrot" I'll dangle before myself when I feel tempted to try moderation. Shame didn't do it for me!

I can't moderate. I've tried, and that "plan" lasts about one day, then ZAP, it's right back to the bottomless thirst!

Anyone else feel the same? By the way, I'm on Day 12 AF so far. Longest I've ever made it is 7 weeks, a couple of years ago, so now I have that record to beat...

[Mema]

Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

I agree with you Jane, beating ourselves up doesn't accomplish anything. The only thing that "remembering" does for me is to remind myself that no matter how great I feel or how many days, weeks, months or years I have AF I can not drink. You'd think I could remember that tiny fact...but I seem to have to keep testing it. Oh well get up dust myself off and get back in the saddle again!
Congratulations on 12 days, Yay for you!!!

[Meech]

Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

Jane Jane - You are doing great. And you will beat that record just keep focussing on what works for you!! :goodjob:

So many posts that relate to my life as well. Great sharing of stories, painful but true.

Mema - After such a long stretch of AF - it really confirms the fact that you always need to be on guard. For myself when I have had AF stretches (much shorter than yours) the thought of just having one night to let loose then go back to AF, or even worse thinking I can actually moderate - is ridiculous. Impossible. Yet I still try it out.


Coalfire - what you said is something I have done too many times. I don't even try to fight the craving. It pisses me off.
There is about 5-10 mins where I am aware that I am craving and then something comes over me. I have my coat on and my feet are taking me to buy my alcohol supply before I even know what is happening. The thing that shocks me the next day is the absolute lack of fight I put up at the time.Its as if all my previous fight and Mwo posts counted for nothing. If you asked me the next day what made me throw away my AF run so lightly the truth is I have no idea any more than you do. The trance theory is the nearest I can come to explain it.

For me thinking of the embarassing times, the horrid hangovers works for the first couple of days of AF then that strategy for me loses it's effectiveness. The whole "oh but that won't happen this time!!" yeah right.

So on day 5Af if the craving starts I just immediately try to block it out. I won't even give it a second to soak into my AL Brain. It seems to be working, for how long who knows?? But for now that's my strategy. I don't give it the priviledge to enter my AF thoughts.

Have a great Sober Weekend all! :l

[vintage girl]

Forgetting-what-actually-happened Syndrome

I haven't had time to read this thread just now, but it's really interesting to read. The shame factor versus the positivity...I think I am balanced between the two. I do think of how things really were if I am hit with a really bad urge or craving. The one that stands out for me might not sound too bad to some of you; but mine is waking up, reeking of red wine, my tongue, teeth and mouth BLACK, and I had to get to work that day.

My eyes were bloodshot, I was shaking...it was awful. I was supposed to be professional, calm, a leader, and there I was...shaking, pretending to have flu, just praying I could get through the day without anyone noticing (as if!)


I didn't drink my beloved red wine again after that, I switched to spirits like gin, or vodka. I told myself they were 'cleaner'. ( I know, go figure.)

It is a handy tool to have, but I am, in spite of my AL 'problem',I am a nataurally positive person, so I do tend to focus on the good stuff, like how much better I am as a human being wthout AL, how my life and work relationships have improved, and how, when people tell me they look up to me, I don't feel like so much of a fraud.

This site is amazing, I wish I could spend more time here, some of the stuff on this thread is a real eye opener.