Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Is this possible? I've actually got a phobia of cults, I don't want to go down the line of twelve steps, I can do maybe the first one and then I get ridiculously uncomfortable. I know they say "take what you want and leave the rest" but are they saying to themself that "...if you do you will relapse". I like the idea of AA (group of people that want to quit drinking) but don't like the idea of the weird parts- the world is vexing enough.

[mama bear]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

I have been here a year and have greatly reduced my alcohol intake but am not AF. So I am revising my plan and adding AA to my list. Alot of people here have really enjoyed it. I'll let you know!!

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

mama bear;1073102 wrote: I have been here a year and have greatly reduced my alcohol intake but am not AF. So I am revising my plan and adding AA to my list. Alot of people here have really enjoyed it. I'll let you know!!

Thanks. Yeah I'm at this quitting game quite some time too but as yet am not AF. I don't so much dislike the drinking, its the obsession with quitting afterwards that gets me down. It takes way too much time, and usually results in fatigue and a willingness to get pissed to end the debate.

[fluff]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

Isn't it okay to just attend the meetings without becoming immersed or too involved? Just sit and listen and chat afterwords?

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

Yeah that's what I'm wondering...Is that possible without pressure to part take in everything? I went once, it was interesting to hear other's stories, I didn't want to tell mine or anything (I was relatively young at 24,, 27 now). I'm not sure how that works over the longer term.

[madmans]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

i would have no problem trying AA if need be. I was like you with the obsession after quitting, i went nearly two months AF then went on the rip for about a week just after Xmass, being stopped drinking was always on my mind when i was AF. So i had to try some thing different, i read about Allen Carr's book "easy way to control alcohol" here and tried that. In the book it tries to change the way you look at alcohol. I knew i could stop drinking and since reading that book i really don't want to drink but if that hadn't worked i would have no problem going to AA, it has and still is saving peoples lives

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

I have a feeling that it might operate slightly different in Ireland than in the States. (I'm in Ireland also). For one thing, noone ever complains about AA in Ireland in the same way that they do in the States, from what I've seen.

[mario]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

fluff;1073115 wrote: Isn't it okay to just attend the meetings without becoming immersed or too involved? Just sit and listen and chat afterwords?

I have gone to lots of AA meetings just for the above its a great feeling being around fellow like minded people and never did me a bit of harm and only helped me in this battle.

[mario]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

_EndOfTheLine_;1073121 wrote: I have a feeling that it might operate slightly different in Ireland than in the States. (I'm in Ireland also). For one thing, noone ever complains about AA in Ireland in the same way that they do in the States, from what I've seen.

I am sure there are lots of people in Ireland who have there different opinions about AA, but at the end of the day its what you want to take from it that matters .

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

Do you still attend Mario?

[mario]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

No EndoftheLine dont go anymore,
For me personally i just had not got the time and i come here instead,but i would never say i wouldn't go again it is always a good option for me.

[fluff]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

End of the Line- Also, my sister has been going to AA for many years- and it has become her social life-her friends are all from AA-I think each place has it's own 'personality'-so you might find one place you like-more than another. So, if you get turned off by the first one-try another place nearby...if there is that option. Where I live there's a meeting place in almost every town around me.

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

fluff;1073130 wrote: End of the Line- Also, my sister has been going to AA for many years- and it has become her social life-her friends are all from AA-I think each place has it's own 'personality'-so you might find one place you like-more than another. So, if you get turned off by the first one-try another place nearby...if there is that option. Where I live there's a meeting place in almost every town around me.

You see, this is what I'm afraid of. With due respect to yourself for sorting her problems out. I don't want my friends to be associated with a solution to a problem. AA members seem to cluster together and I don't want that, I don't want this to become my life, I'd rather drink- that's not an exaggeration.

Thanks Sherri for your input. Its hard to keep an open mind sometimes because if you're like me you are used to knowing best. I try my best to surrender to other people's judgement, I have to say though for better or for worse I am naturally skeptical of people. In saying that, I have been a complete flop at staying sober so I would need to start listening to somebody. Either that or...

When I think about it, the longest time I ever had sober was when i was 19 and decided just to quit drinking for a while. At that stage I hadn't gone down any treatment route, self help or otherwise, I just relied on my own willpower. Maybe thats the key- Forget the mental trickery, self help and all that and just quit. Could it be that simple? Probably not.

[KateH1]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

Hi Endoftheline,

It sounds like you are searching for a way out of the drinking life, but you want to set your own rules of what you are willing to do in order to reach and maintain sobriety. Though I can understand wanting to work within your own comfort zone, I will also add that there is nothing easy or comfortable with learning to give up alcohol and live sober. In fact, most of us will be honest in telling you that many times in our early days, we were down right uncomfortable. It is not easy to look ourselves in he mirror and accept who we have become and that we do not "know it all". Also, sober living for the long run, is way more than simply not drinking. It really does take a personality over haul and a spiritual awakening of sorts. ( not religious, but spiritual).

I encourage you to continue to consider your options and also to get very honest with yourself. Best wishes on finding your way!

Kate

[_EndOfTheLine_]

Want to go to AA, but don't want to become fanatic

Thanks Kate for your reply. People do things differently, for example I have three alcoholic relations, 1 simply quit one day after years and years of abuse, the other 2 go to AA (1 of whom is pretty militant about it). My observation is that the one who simply quit is in a better situation, but thats just my impression.

How did you quit? and did you use AA? And congrats on your sobriety.