An Apology

[kitty72]

I apologise to everybody I upset here over the weekend, notably ktab, mario and cymru.

I cant really say a lot, Ive done something to my left hand and am typing one handed, I know its the amount I drank ..... at 11.30pm a friend took the equivalent of 3 bottles away - was a box of wine, I just had to get it off the premises.

Anyway so I start again. And once more, I am very sorry. Dont think I'll be around for a bit and will go post elsewhere for a while as I am too shamed by my actions here, Take care everyone and thanks xxxxx

[rubywillow]

An Apology

Kitty, I wasn't aware of the situation, but it is wonderful of you to come and make your apologies. Let yourself be accountable here, to whomever you talk to regularly. But it is the nature of this beast we've fought, and I expect there are no hard feelings for whatever your posts were. Hang in there, honey, and start over now. Stick to it.

[kitty72]

An Apology

thanks rubes, scuse my lack of caps but the hand thing is causing me issues. im not after a pat on the back or sympathy as i was pretty vile, just had to apologise tho xxx

[fluff]

An Apology

Hi Kitty- I did read back on some of your posts and what brought you up to this point- When we drink sometimes- we cannot be accountable for what we say- and we all know that some things are said under the influence- but that doesn't mean that's who you are...We all are a bit different under the influence of alcohol. I'm pretty sure you are a nicer person than what appeared..

[mumofsix]

An Apology

To put it bluntly - alcohol fucks you up! This comes from a New Zealand, king country, Woman and we say it like it is! Just start afresh we have all done and said some pretty shitty things under the influence of drink. However there is always tomorrow. Over the weekend I ran my first 42k full marathon in 4.38.06 and I was thankful for my strong body that I abuse so often. I was very proud - then last night I fucked it up and drank a bottle of wine, to then go out and run 22k this morning. You see we all suffer! I hate myself every single time I'm drawn to booze - yet I also know I am such a good person as I know you are. I said to my husband at the start of this marathon - I feel too unworthy to be running with such elite runners in an elite race, you see my whole life, I've had an ignorant Father tell me how useless I was and how I'll never succeed at anything. I had to put my body on the "line" to prove to myself I could do something that only 1 percent of the population ever does to feel good about myself. Shouldnt we just start loving ourselves for who we are not what we arent?

[mario]

An Apology

Morning kitty apology accepted by me, I know all to well what alcohol can do to peoples personalities as I have been there myself many a time, and in this struggle we all need friends and support not criticism, Good for your friend for helping you out but at the end of the day its down to us individually to make our choices, I hope you make yours soon no matter were you post, wishing you the best in this ongoing fight. x

[Guest]

An Apology

I am not aware of your actions or posts at the weekend, it is however a good thing to be able to recognise what alcohol does to you. By this I don't mean beat yourself up about it, but next time you think about having a drink you can use this as an incentive not to reach for the bottle. Think to yourself, do I really want to be that crappy person?Or do I want peace of mind when I wake up tomorrow?

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

An Apology

Kitty thank you for your apology. You are really a lovely lady but when drunk AL turned you into someone I didnt recognise and quite honestly I was shocked and angered by the ferocity of your attack on fellow members.
We are all in the one boat here and while we may not always agree with or indeed even get on with everyone, just like in any other area of life I suppose, this place exists because people want to beat this crippling disease/illness/affliction. I truly hope you can use this experience in a positive way and turn it to your advantage. It has been suggested that we write down how we feel when at our lowest and read back on them to remind us because undoubtably our alkie brains will tell us one wont hurt after a few days sobriety, maybe you could try this?
I only ever wanted to be of support to you and I do wish you well, never ever give up on yourself, you are so worth it.

[gyco]

An Apology

life is what it is

kitty72;1108654 wrote: I apologise to everybody I upset here over the weekend, notably ktab, mario and cymru.

I cant really say a lot, Ive done something to my left hand and am typing one handed, I know its the amount I drank ..... at 11.30pm a friend took the equivalent of 3 bottles away - was a box of wine, I just had to get it off the premises.

Anyway so I start again. And once more, I am very sorry. Dont think I'll be around for a bit and will go post elsewhere for a while as I am too shamed by my actions here, Take care everyone and thanks xxxxx

:H hi kitty you sure said a mouth full :H my dear we ve all done it, you wont be the last one either :upset: but isnt it nice to be able to come back and actually see what you ve said my dear addiction is not fun,it will be a lerning experience the rest of your life ,everyone has the nitch on here, just have to find the one that suits you and Quote i say You the best, today is a new day and we all try to start over, yesterday is gone take care gyco:goodjob:

[spuddleduck]

An Apology

hi kitty (the real kitty that is).no it wasnt nice, i think we all realized that it was the al talking. i can turn into a totally different person in drink, mr spuds has a different name for that person. its awful. well done for acknowledging it and apologising, and yes you can use the thought of it to help motivate you not to drink. please dont feel you have to be away from here. as has already been said (by the people involved) YOU are a lovely lady. kitty is great.... perhaps we should call the al you 'spitty'. so we dont like spitty but we love kitty......... lets keep spitty in the box. welcome kitty.

[kitty72]

An Apology

thanks spud , i subscribed to this thread so came to look. there are other issues , i have ms but only relapse into it occasionally - thats where i am now for the first time in 2 yrs ... im on very high dose of steroids at the mo and feel great tho its affecting my hands and my typing is shit. i hit a big black wall of depression last weekend ( as it starts that way ) but nt all people with ms choose to drink themselves stupid and kick off like i did so no excuse. i am working on a plan for my triggers now .

anyway i hope u are ok yrself lol love not so spitty kitty now xxxx

[Doggygirl]

An Apology

Hi Kitty. :l:l I didn't know you have MS. I am sorry to hear that. All the more reason to get AL out of your life. AL never helps - always just makes things worse. Physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. I am so glad to see you post here. Onward we go - together.

DG

[rubywillow]

An Apology

Kit, there are several here (me among them) who have MS. Mine is also very mild, usually in regression. My dear friend of half a century was hit by a sudden, catastrophic, case of it, and can barely walk, so I'm SO thankful mine is what I consider minor.
It seems to me it's like diabetics who abuse AL. If we have a medical problem, it's like a Catch 22. We KNOW we can't abuse ourselves, but sometimes the pain, of just moving, is too much, and we turn to AL. It might ease us a moment, an hour, but in the long run it takes 3X as long to recover from abuse.
PM me if you want to chat about this, OK? I've done horrible things when drinking. And offended so many, hurt so many people. But it's in the nature of people who really care about us, to want us to be better, to succeed, and to forgive.

[kitty72]

An Apology

thanks rubes and i will pm when my hands work properly again xxx