On being an other at MWO

[eustacia]

I belong to several online communities. The mission of MYO is perhaps the most important in that it is addressing a potentially fatal health condition. What puzzles me is that MYO appears to be the least demographically diversified of these communities. This gives me pause. People whose value systems, sexual orientations, religions, racial or ethnic backgrounds are out of the mainstream seem very underrepresented here. I wonder if something subtle is going on that causes other than young or middle aged, white, heterosexual, by-the-book Christians to feel unwelcome or to lurk, rather than take a more active role in the community. I would like to start a discussion about this concern because I feel that there is so little out there for problem drinkers who are out of the mainstream. The idea of MWO being unwittingly exclusionary makes me quite sad. Would anyone like to join me in this discussion, either in this thread or by PMing me?

My best to everyone, Eustacia

[Olly]

On being an other at MWO

Hey Euthsatcia,

I just PM'd you... but let me say publicly, I have never felt anyone's prejudice, ethnocentricity or judgement here. Except for a few that may have been banned along the way.

Take care,
Olly

[irishlady]

On being an other at MWO

Hello Eustacia,

At the risk of offending anyone, and please if I do then I apologise in advance, my feeling on this subject is, people come to this site because they have a problem with alcohol. Does anything else matter?

I don't think someone new would start off saying for example....... Hi I am a one legged chinese lesbian, 92 years old and I have a problem with alcohol........No of course they wouldn't. Anyway how do we know there aren't people like that here, with this site the primary concern of the members is how to moderate or abastain from drinking.

I myself am, 59 years old, white, southern Irish, hetrosexual, brought up as an Irish catholic in my early years, but now I have found my own path as regards religion and consider myself a more spiritual person then a religious on.

Perhaps as an experiment if any members out there just wanted to write a line about themselves, it would be interesting.

Mind you, this is a site where people sometimes wish to stay annonymous for fear of being found out by friends or work colleagues, I know because I hesitated before revealing whereabouts I lived in the UK.

I'll end this by saying that never, ever since I've joined MWO have I seen the slightest hint of prejudice about anything on here, quite the contrary in fact, as everyone is given the warmest of welcomes and as much help and support as can be given.

With hope for a world without prejudice,

Louise xx

[fsophiah]

On being an other at MWO

This is a really interesting topic because I have wondered about the proponderance of well-educated, middle-aged women here. I have wondered how we have self-selected the group we have. On the other hand, I've been seeing more men, and I know that at least a few of our long timers are gay. One of the posts from a newbie said she (or he) was afraid she wasn't clever enough to post. As far as I know, googling gets you to the page. And really, you have to need the program enough to go on with it. People who can't commit are going to fall away, just as they do with all groups, particularly those that deal with substance abuse. Maybe that's why we get so bonded. We are here for ourselves and our investment in hope for ourselves, not to make a diversity statement. By the by, AA is a lot more diverse, but you don't have to have a computer to get there.

[InnerStrength]

On being an other at MWO

Oh wow this is a great topic.
I too do not feel that there is any form of discrimination or prejudice on these boards in any sense of the word. I have never encountered or witnessed any such thing in the entire time i have belonged to this wonderful group.
However, i do think that perhaps Sophia has a point - to get here, you probably have to have a computer or at least access to a computer, and to have a computer, you have to have at least some money (I read a statistic that only 10% of the world's population has access to a computer). So that could be part of it - that might contribute to the middle class thing.
In fact, this rea;lly sparks my interest. I would be very interested to know what kinds of people, demographically, belong to online groups generally. I wonder if any research has been done on this? I think it could be really important to understand, because if certain groups or demographics are not being reached for some reason, then they are missing the opportunity to learn and grow in great programs, such as ours.
As another note too, some people may get discouraged by reading that certain supps are necessary/recommended by the program, which also cost money and not all people can afford that - just a thought.
Love you all
Jen

[MonaCat]

On being an other at MWO

"young or middle aged, white, heterosexual, by-the-book Christians"
Sorry, I don't get this?
Maybe because I don't fit this cookey cutter classification.
The diversity of this community has never crossed my mind.
I just know there are loving human beings out there reaching out to me, helping me heal and find my way.
Beautiful souls, and I don't care how old they are, or what their religion or sexual orientation is all about.
I guess I have been too focused on what's on the inside of this population, not what is on the outside.
It doesn't matter to me much. No one seems to care that I am a bit different.
I don't know why buy just find this topic offensive.

[InnerStrength]

On being an other at MWO

Hi Mona Cat
I hear ya - it never matters to me either - what age, race, ethinicity, sex, social class, religion etc. anyone belongs to. We are here with a common struggle and I love each of you for what you bring here, not what you are in terms of those "cookie cutter" classifications.
I love ya
Jen

[bestlifeldms]

On being an other at MWO

Yes, this is a good topic!

It has, however been brought up before. I believe that because the book was written by a professional female, it has a natural attraction to female readers and hence those followers. However, we have a growing number of male members. I don't hear religion specifically discussed on the general boards and unless you go to "What We Believe" those topics are only sporatic. Our denominations aren't something that is catagorically recorded and so we really don't know what our religeous demographics are.

Male, female, regardless of ethnicity, religion or age- what we all share is a problem with alcohol- to varying degrees. Any and all can come here to get and give support. The goal is to seek and find and improvement in that condition.

It has always appeared to me that it is the goal of the MWO web-site to encourage this for all people, no matter what their orientation. For that I am very appreciative.

My best wishes to each of you,

Best

[Breez]

On being an other at MWO

Sorry, never thought about it~and didn't care. I started the program on my own last year & just recently became a member here. All I care about when I come here is how I can help & how someone else can help me in my journey.

Quite honestly I view everyone here equally in that we all share one common factor-our problem with alcohol.

And with all the diverse user names I sometimes can't tell if I'm reading a post from a male or female, young or old ....... or even a gifted cat for that matter :H

PEACE.

[MonaCat]

On being an other at MWO

SeaBreeze,

I'll take that as a compliment, which is making my day.
Many thanks, and lots of hugs.

The Gifted Cat AKA MonaCat

[Bluemoon]

On being an other at MWO

I don't know, Eustacia.
Many of the posts here are genderless. Excepting those who have identified their gender in either their avatar/name or description have me guessing. And, certainly not caring about their race, creed, sexual oreintation or political affiliation. I have learned and benefited from the common experience shared here in so many posts - the grappling with alcoholism in its many stages.

MWO has catagorized groups, ie for men, and faith. But, I have seen women respond in the men group and I, as an atheist, have responded to a question posted in the faith group. I think this is simply a community with a common bond - alcoholism - and that bond trivializes the usual what-I-stand-for-hear-me-roar philosophies heralded elsewhere.

Personally, I like the anonymity. If we got too specific we would lose so much of the rounded insight we enjoy at MWO.
Cheers, all.

[Guest]

On being an other at MWO

Hello everyone.

I was the person who stated that I wasn't quite sure what to say. That is out of shyness, not because I thought anyone was better than me. I was merely being as puppy that turns it's belly up to the heirarchy. Because I wasn't quite sure where to fit in.

I am Young, Gifted and Black. So stick that in your pipe and smoke it. I just like reading about everone's stories. And learning about their history.

I read peoples posts, just as if I know that person, regardless of race, color, creed, sexual orientation... Who Cares? The point is , is that we are here because of a common cause. Alcohol. And we support one another.

Sorry to speak out of turn, but my cheeks started burning then !!! ( face ) !!!!

Sorry I went cross then..

Oh And P.S Eustacia It is M'W'O Not MYO

[dilayne]

On being an other at MWO

Very interesting topic...I'm thinking that someone that doesn't really know me might plug me into the slot.."middle aged, educated, christian woman and maybe alcoholic?" But, I don't see myself like that at all, and I don't feel that way..I call myself a christian but came about it from a very unexpected way (and my beliefs may be very contrary to another christians..), and my beliefs run from the same stream as many of the other spiritual wisdoms.

Often I feel like a I come from beyond the mainstream, but that is because I tend to feel that way no matter where I am..I think it's a vantage point for me, or the perspective one takes...all that aside, I think that every movement has a language and it will resonate with people who ring into it..and that there are very real variables to consider as said before..technology for one. I do think that this place does provide a place for much diversity but no one forum will ever be designed that will reach everyone because one that will reach one, may inadvertently alienate another...people who are not in the mainstream may be hesitant to join in for that very reason...

I actually like MWO because even though I may avoid organized institutions as such because of my disposition, I still feel safe to be who I am here and to express my feelings..whether anyone relates to them or not, or if anyone understands them..if I came here expecting that, I may not necessarily want to stay around very long, but just being here has helped me let go of those kinds of expectations and helped me very much to just be who I am..no expectations attached...that's been a freeing thing for me..but that is also because that is where I am on this journey...

I read somewhere many years ago that souls travel in packs...I like that too...it's been affirmed in my life more than a couple of times...it may be the people that are attraced to this site come here because we have a common problem, but also that we are on similar soul "levels" and this forum resonates for us..if that makes any sense.

Thanks 'E' for your always thought provoking ideas.
d

[lucky 2.0]

On being an other at MWO

Souls travel in packs. I like that idea very much.

[Guest]

On being an other at MWO

Hi Dilayne

You have resonated a thought in me, one that I have never thought before. People who come here, shy away from the mainstream ' institutionalised help meetings ' but that is a sentence that isn't necessarily true .

I think, that is what I mean is ( I mean AA - the global institution ).

My mum's best friend had a daughter, who was adopted, and brought up in Canada, swears by the AA. She came over with my mum's friend ( her mum ) and mum's friend has lived in The Cayman Islands ( she married a guy from there ) since she was in her 20''s and came to stay with my mum after advertising in the Liverpool Echo ( a newspaper ) looking for my mum after all these years.

Anyway the point of this story is that whilst the daughter was in England, went to AA meetings over here - religiously. And it has really helped her.

Has AA helped anyone here? - I am trying to gain help from anyone who knows what to do.

Sorry for rambling on there. You should meet me face to face - you would'nt get a word in edgeways !!!!


Cait X