Anyway, Joe wasn't home. I started wish I could drink. Okay, I picked out a cute outfit I'd wear tomorrow, put it on, looked kinda cute. Decided to call it an early nite, REAL early-do that when depressed.
So this morning look at outfit didn't feel like putting it on-happens a lot when I'm depressed wear same old blah clothes, hairstyle, etc.
Joe is working OT but getting home early-earlier than me. If we are working on property-which is good for us both, that is good-but if not, I asked him to pick up some movies, he said okay, then thought boy beer would be good with that. DID NOT SAY THAT. Would not with Joe there-would not sabotage Joe. But if he said it I would jump at it.
This is that pattern that sabotages us. One or the both of us does this.
Now if this were Friday or Saturday and Joe wasn't home I would probably get beer.
I'm hoping by Friday this mood will pass and I won't feel this way. How can I make this mind change? KICK MY BUTT. I don't want to go down this road, it's a downward spiral and not only don't I want it for me I don't want the guilt and shame of taking my hubby down with me.
HELP. :upset:
Comment