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Being Sober is HARD work!

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    #1

    Being Sober is HARD work!

    I feel about as low as a snails arse right now. Its my 3rd day sober,and its getting to me a bit now. My husband and I went to see his dad tonight, and suprise, suprise, he was down the pub. WELL... I was always one of those ppl, who thought it was jus plain crazy ordering a coffee or soft drink in a pub.... Until tonight! I was the one asking the nice barmen for a large COFFEE!!! Everyone around me was getting merry, and drinking and having a laugh, and although I tried, I just could'nt be my bubbly happy self, like I always am when I am off my face on double vodkas and redbull. Shit, how I miss them right bout now. :upset: anyways, I made it home with 2 coffees and 1 fruit juice inside of me. Im feeling rather agrevated right now, just want to crawl into bed and stay there for a long time. Arrrr. Unfortunataly, iv got my sister,husband and dad in laws birthdays this week! I mean, SERIOUSLY?! Theres no way I can avoid this week, so I will just have to soldier on and get this week over with. Stock up on my sparkling water, and SMILE! Thank goodness for this site. Im glad to be able to share all my thoughts and feelings with you guys. Cause u understand.

    Hope u all have a lovely weekend. Till tommorow. Sweet dreams.
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    #2
    Being Sober is HARD work!

    Hi Liz-good job on staying off the drink during a difficult social event. You do sound high on alternative stimulants though--coffee and sugary soft drink high. I don't know your long term goal but I would immediately suggest being your fun self at these events without the alternative stimulants. Sparkling water with natural fruit juice is yummy and you can fool them all while having a great time. My first 30 day (ok 28/29) stint I went to a live oldies concert and danced my ass off! I bet everyone there thought I was lubricated--but I wasn't! Start with a goal and go after it with tenacity and thrill in the fact that you are doing it! It's all about you now and what you want. The rest will follow if you follow that..... Sweet dreams to you.

    Start by doing what's necessary, then what's possible and suddenly you are doing the impossible.


    St. Francis of Assisi

    Comment

      #3
      Being Sober is HARD work!

      Lizzzzzzzzzzz!

      Ugh! R U kidding? That must have been really hard. What are you thinking going to a pub on day 3??
      I am so proud of you, that had to be unbelievably hard for you. LOL....you poor thing.
      Well, you've got your hands full this weekend.
      We're all here for you, so keep up the good work! You will feel good in the morning that's for sure.
      It does get easier. Day 2 & 3 were really hard for me, so I think you did a great job. I am at day 20 and I haven't gone into any place that serves AL. This weekend will be difficult for me too as I have a big river party that I am hostessing. Sparkling water and cranberry juice for me. Night Night Liz!
      THOUGHTS become THINGS
      choose the GOOD       ones!

      AF since 5/22/11 :boxer: Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.............

      Comment

        #4
        Being Sober is HARD work!

        Hi LizM23
        Well done on staying sober in a difficult situation. having three birthdays this week is a really really tough one. I found social situations difficult at first and avoided them in the first few weeks. I was so in the habit of drinking that breaking the habit was key and took a lot of will power. Like others I drank tall gasses of sparkling water when out but as you say it is really hard work. Good luck and if it's any help keep reminding yourself why you are giving up the booze, that might help.

        Comment

          #5
          Being Sober is HARD work!

          Indeed liz sober living is vastly different than drinking living!

          But I can at the start of being sober interact with other people in a meaningful way and not get into stupid & meaningless arguments.
          I can enjoy my fun time and not have to apologize for my behavior.and there are so many other things I can do and remember them.


          When I decided to seek help for my alcoholism, I thought that drinking was my problem (my only problem) and that once I put the booze down, my life would snap back into shape. I guess I expected rainbows, butterflies, and puppy dogs.But nope it took hard work but I must say enjoyable hard work as you can see the difference and the attitude around you changing in a really positive way.Dont quit quitting liz its so worth it.


          :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

          Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
          I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

          This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

          Comment

            #6
            Being Sober is HARD work!

            oooooooooh Liz,
            Heard my name mentioned so I thought I'd better drop by and say hello.

            I don't envy you one little bit. I have to say I avoided all pub situations like the plague, still do, if I'm honest. The pub is for drinking in and I'm no longer a drinker. I don't mind a pub quiz, a bar meal but honestly I'd rather poke me eyes out than sit all night with a pub load of drinkers.

            Now then as Molly said the arrive late leave early strategy is a brilliant one.. Make sure you have a glass of something non -alcoholic in your hand before any one asks what you'd like to drink. A wee tummy upset could be mentioned, drop into the conversation that you're on some meds where you can't drink. You're following a new healthy lifestyle you're following, laugh it off about being a fine time to give up drinking.

            And to be honest at the end of the day it's absolutely none of other peoples business why you're not drinking.

            Just remember that you'll be the one leaping out of bed the following morning without the banging hangover and feeling crap.

            It can be done, takes a little planning,just give it a go.

            J x
            :l
            It could be worse, I could be filing.
            AF since 7/7/2009

            Comment

              #7
              Being Sober is HARD work!

              Hiya Liz,
              Just wanted to congrat you on the hard work :l Social situations felt so awkward for me in the beginning and I wasn't myself at all. I felt very dull. I guess I just want to say that the feeling passed and now I enjoy social situations more then I ever thought I would. One thing that helped me is just believing it would get better... I'd say the first few times out felt similar to starting a new job or a new school. I felt like an outsider not drinking and "enjoying" myself with everyone... but now... I forget that I'm not drinking and it doesn't bother me at all to be around others who are. Hang in there... for me being sober is still hard work sometimes but life is so much easier in general without AL.
              Best, Choice

              Comment

                #8
                Being Sober is HARD work!

                Thanks for all ur lovely comments guys, it great to get sum advice and chat to people who know what its all about. Feeling bit beta today. So upwards and onwards.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Being Sober is HARD work!

                  Isn't it great to wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed! And remember going to bed? Yes, you were irritated, but you know what, you did it! Be pr0ud. I, too, was hesitant (am fairly new, today is #13) and at #4 I chose not to go to local Happy Hour. I am alone in retirement community (dh still up north, getting ready to retire). Then got invite for "drinks" and dinner this past Thurs. I went bringing some NA beer, became designated driver, and was surprised how good of a time I had. They invited me to join them for Happy Hour & dinner last night so must have been 'ok' company. I went. Being summer a lot of people are drinking their vodka tonics, I had Diet tonic w/lime and looked just like anyone else. At dinner when everyone ordered their wine, did I feel a pang? Yes, but fleeting. You did great, you passed. Keep carryin' on.
                  The pain of discipline is less than the pain of regret.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Being Sober is HARD work!

                    Nice one tomyhealth, it sure is a great feeling.


                    :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                    Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                    I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                    This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                    Comment

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