borderline personality disorder

[Kimberley]

borderline personality disorder

Hey Trying - well done for signing up! I'm 31 and am only just getting to grips with the whole thing. What I love about DBT which CBT etc doesn't give you is that it actually VALIDATES how you feel while giving you strategies to be more effective. This was so important for me as I kick against anything which tells me I am wrong But now I can tell myself 'God, I'm really hurting. Ah, I can see my BPD patterns in there - now what can I do to make myself feel better.' Something I can't change? Accept it and stop wasting energy. It is ok to feel down about bad stuff, as long as you don't allow yourself to get drawn into the cycle of negative thinking about everything because one thing went wrong. Something you can change? Either do your best to change it, or if you don't have the courage to at that moment, accept that too and acknowlege any progress you have made.

BPD is a really tricky customer as it can't be 'treated', only managed. When I found that out initially, I thought well screw it then. Now I realise that managing it helps me feel very empowered actually. The online class can be a bit confusing at first as you just join in wherever the class already is - but this is no reason not to jump on in there, as the class keeps going on a loop with regular reviews. Get the workbook mentioned if you can. And one other tip, I started off by questivning what the point of some of it was - like, ah that's not really useful for me. It is. All of it. Some more than others,but I now see the point of all of it, so get stuck in.

While it is great that we can access this class immediately to make a start on managing our disorder better, do still push for face-to-face treatment as that's really important too.

K x

[tryingsohard]

borderline personality disorder

thanks again youu ve been so helpfull, im feeling so much more confident about looking hard at myself /triggers and my emotions in general,ive spent so long trying to switch them of it s unsettling at first but with the group im attending im beginning to open up and really changing the way i function, i spoke to my key worker today an owned up to the 3 realapses ive mentioned,and got a action plan of thing s to sort money , housing etc, the parenting skills class is brilliant, it s not just about kids it just opens up the whole communication/feelings and awarness of these, so im gonna throw myself into using all the faciklities im lucky enough to have available at the minuite,and nag the dr about medication etc as im convinced this prozac is making me so much more impulsive,im gonna quit taking it,1st time ive been sober enough to be aware of the warnings i keep getting, and get onto my councilor to make an appointment, its another new 1 so have been putting of going and having to get him up to date with the whole sorry ass history! im really quite excited about the course although i have to keep reminding myself to calm down once im excited about something i think i get like a 10 yr old with adhd,plan a million things and then crash and get frustrated that its not possible to complete/finishing thinking /remember all the wonderful plans so im trying to remain as steady an level as possible so i can take the time to actually take things in rather than skim read life!, you have given me such hope that an understanding of yourself is possible if you stop to look once again thank you xxx,i hope you are really proud of how much youve learnt and changed for yourself, amazing xx

[Kimberley]

borderline personality disorder

Ah thanks Trying - I am a work in progress. And hopefully you will be able to look at yourself soon and see you've made good progress too. It can be done! It's work, but well worth it when things start clicking

K x

[tryingsohard]

borderline personality disorder

yep ive realised that recently, i know that im not going to ever get any where if i dont change the things that keep going wrong! lol when i work out y i can figure out how to change it, i do like a challenge!! xx

[tryingsohard]

borderline personality disorder

thanks for taking the time on your birthday to chat to me, i didnt realise till just now, but does it feel good to be sober on your birthday,xx

[Kimberley]

borderline personality disorder

No worries Yes it does feel GREAT to be both sober and managing myself on my b'day. Do you know what, I can not remember the last time I didn't cry on my birthday - it would happen every year, even a couple of years ago when I WAS sober but not in AA and not having done DBT. My bf had taken me to Paris, my fave city, and I still friggin cried!

This year, not a single tear. I got a few cards, a couple of pressies, lots of b'day messages, my flatmate bought me cupcakes, I spoke to my parents and visited a friend - and I actually had a nice day I never thought I'd say that on my b'day! Kim 1 - Alcohol/BPD 0

K x

[Guitarista]

borderline personality disorder

Hi Trying,

Just dropping in to wish you strength, clarity, some patience and success on your journey, especially these next few weeks. Sounds exciting, and the fact you are taking control and making things happen is something i'm sure you're very proud of, and should be.

I don't know if the following support group is relevant, or of any use to you, but there's a support group called GROW, which is for people/carer's/family experiencing mental health challenges, run by punter's, for punter's. Been going since the 1960's, is international, and started in the U.K. i think. They meet weekly all over the place, and from what i gather, it's not a class or a program, but just folk's meeting up for a cuppa and a chat. May or may not be up your alley. Anyway, great going on your AF time. 4 months is 4 mths, regardless of any hiccups. Keep up the great work, and keep it going friend! Anything is possible, and you can get to where you want to be, just remember that.

As for you Kimberley, you're a bloody star! Happy birthday, and keep up the great work.

Greg.

[tryingsohard]

borderline personality disorder

wicked that s the kind of birthday im aiming for next year,lol i know what ya mean my birthday song has always been " its my party and ill cry if i want too!!" very pleased you had no tears, thanks greg i will check out the link, sounds just my cup of tea!! things are definatley feeling so much more structured since ive attended the group im on, an i think with the structure it s just making me feel so much more positive about the future, it really really helps to be around people you can be honest with an every one in the group has a rough idea of what your going through, id strongly advise those who are starting out to try and find a aa meeting or similar, im yet to attend aa but ive really learnt so much from the others on the group and learnt so much about myself by being able to be honest to myelf and with others without the usual judgement, i can say today im actually loving life!!!! shattered but in a good way , ive worked hard up the allotment so hopefully i will sleep soundly tonight, well for a few hrs, ! love to all,an thanks xx oh an i agree you are a star kimberly,

[Kimberley]

borderline personality disorder

Thanks guys - you're too kind. Honestly though, I can't take credit. I have finally found a combination of things that really work for me. All I did was not give up looking for them.

Great that you're thinking of doing AA too - it has really helped me through some tough times and yes it is great to find a place where you can be honest and won't be judged. And where you can make some brilliant friends.

You sound so positive, Trying - that makes me

K x

[tryingsohard]

borderline personality disorder

you should be proud of your acheivement and realising and taking action, i feel im finally getting somewher, a productive few days, possibly got accomodation of my own sorted out,will find out next week, no more sofa bed for me!! (hopefully) my dr explained bpd too me as a condition physiatrists use when they cant treat something,im not mad or physcotic i just am how i am, lol but ive stopped taking prozac,dr s put me on citalopram but unsure if im going to take it, maybe its time to just be me!!1 hope everybody is doing alright, thanks again kimberly, your a star xx