Sunday...

[morrey]

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[Hypernova]

Sunday...

Hey Morrey. I feel basically the same way. Just wish I had the knowledge that the internet and this site have provided to help me achieve an AF life at this point years ago. I know I am only 2 weeks AF but I feel hope. Before it was always just quit and see how long I could hang on with white knuckles. I never felt relaxed in prior attempts or like life held any promise for me to find a way to live without booze. Doctors, I saw many and in reality you need to be your own doctor. Yes life is a struggle. Once you come to the difficult reasoning that life is a struggle you see it as normal and then don't look to escape it. Yesterday is gone. It's hard to deal with our loss of life because of alcohol. Yet we still hang on to the idea that it offers some escape. It doesn't. Just a few moments of feeling like we found Nirvana followed by more suffering than before. Be thankful for the education and career you have and enjoy your life. Make it your life. Transcend the suffering AF & see how great things really are. Best to you, hyper

[morrey]

Sunday...

Thanks Hyper, your kind words meant a lot.

[DriftyAlison0]

Sunday...

Hypernova;1148546 wrote: Hey Morrey. I feel basically the same way. Just wish I had the knowledge that the internet and this site have provided to help me achieve an AF life at this point years ago. I know I am only 2 weeks AF but I feel hope. Before it was always just quit and see how long I could hang on with white knuckles. I never felt relaxed in prior attempts or like life held any promise for me to find a way to live without booze. Doctors, I saw many and in reality you need to be your own doctor. Yes life is a struggle. Once you come to the difficult reasoning that life is a struggle you see it as normal and then don't look to escape it. Yesterday is gone. It's hard to deal with our loss of life because of alcohol. Yet we still hang on to the idea that it offers some escape. It doesn't. Just a few moments of feeling like we found Nirvana followed by more suffering than before. Be thankful for the education and career you have and enjoy your life. Make it your life. Transcend the suffering AF & see how great things really are. Best to you, hyper

I know the feeling. In my previous quits, I didn't have the knowledge that I have now, and the determination that I had and every weekend was the same big struggle. Some weekends I would be successful and others not so much. But this time I have been noticing that the weekends are getting easier. My focus was too much on the AL and stuff back then. Now at day 58af, I know I will never go back to drinking and in previous quits I didn't know for sure if I would be able to stop drinking forever. I love the new me.

[red67]

Sunday...

Hi Morrey, I hope you are feeling better. Early on in soberity it does seem difficult and you can feel like you are missing the alcohol. Just try to remember whatever your AL thoughts are trying to tell you it is a lie and a trick. What helped me was to replay the bad things that alcohol led me to and made me feel. You have to retrain your thinking and really trust that this new life is worth the struggle.

I really wish you wouldn't have deleted your original post. What has helped me in times that AL thoughts tried to trick me into drinking was to reread my old posts from when I was struggling. It really helped me to rethink the actions my alcoholic thoughts tries to trick me into. Whatever your thinking, we have all had the same thoughts. Don't ever be embarrassed or ashamed. The only way we can help you (and you can help yourself) is to be honest. Please let us know how you are doing.

[Hypernova]

Sunday...

Hey Morey what's up? How r' u? Post and let it be. I need the support as much as anyone and it is helpful to lose yourself lending a hand. Hope all is well and you had a good weekend.
Drifty /58 AF days is wonderful and your resolve and mindset are beautiful. I wish that one day I will make up my mind and say I will never drink again. I don't care if it's day 58 or 1558 but it would sure be a relief to feel that. It's like I always keep the idea tucked away in my mind that if things get bad enough I can always drink. I know that somehow that has to be dealt with. Guess though if I just don't pick up one it's okay but I would like to think ~~ oh I am tired, go to bed(not 'have a drink it will energize you') or this physical pain can be muted with a few shots. Would be a relief to know that I would never rely on alcohol again. I can tell I am trying to work on this it's just that the ruts in the brain are deep.