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    #61
    How low can we go?

    Dear Cindi,

    You have so been on my mind and in my step. I think of you often and wondered where you were on your journey. I agree, take your husband to therapy with you. I am sure he doesn't even realize he is part of the problem. I speak from experience. My sober for 3-years alcoholic aunt has been married for over 40 years to a man with severe anger issues. She finally got sober when he forced her into treatment at the age of 62, or he said he would institutionalize her. After 30 years of her daily drinking, he had had enough. But, he had to admit he was part of the problem. He absolutely was part of the problem because he was physically abusive to her early in their marriage and continued to be verbally abusive to her for over 30 years. Now, they really enjoy each other's company. He is far more mellow and sensitive, and now that she's not drinking, she doesn't have the biting tongue and quick-to-anger responses. I lived with her when I was in graduate school and little did I know, she would pack a bottle of booze in her purse for her to drink while she was at work.:upset:

    I so admire you making a bold move like quitting your job because it was adding to your battle with AL. I will be in Huntsville next year and I will PM you before then and I would love to meet you. You are such a source of strength and a positive force for everyone here. PM me if you want....would love to hear from you.

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      #62
      How low can we go?

      Oh hunni *hugs*

      I've been very low. It pains me now to think about it so much so I can't actually do it. I've almost taught myself to shake the thoughts of the past out. People said to me when you truly hit the lowest point you'll change... I hit that point many times but never changed. In my finally attempt I went to see a hypnotist and oh my god, it worked. Have you thought about seeing one?

      Try nor to torture yourself ok, go easy on yourself! All my love and prayers hunni xx

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        #63
        How low can we go?

        Cindi, just saw this thread. The last time I tried calling the calls were going straight to voicemail W hen we have chatted you told me about your fear of husband liking your salary more than you. Glad you aresober and you are both getting treatment. However, I think it would be an excellent idea to visit Ruby and/or Zen and let them love on you for a while.

        Much love.
        Enlightened by MWO

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          #64
          How low can we go?

          Cindi,
          I rarely come here, but for some reason came today. I am 9 days away from 2 years sober. I have done some really awful things too. I had 2 DUIs, which I dont even remember getting arrested one time. I almost lost my kids, which you know mean the world to me. I got REALLY low. You can and will get better. Money isnt everything. Take some down time and get better. As for hubby...I have no advise other than do what you have to do for YOU.
          Forever loved, forever missed Papa Bear

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            #65
            How low can we go?

            Dear Cindi,
            I rarely go outside the daily abs or weekly abs anymore but for some reason tonite I did and I found your post. I am so sorry. I had no idea what you have gone through. I knew you had gone to rehab earlier this year and was so happy to see you back on daily abs. I send my love and thoughts to you that the experience of hitting bottom will finally lead you out of the grips of AL. That you and your husband will benefit and grow together from therapy. That you will be here for another 54 wonderful years, loving yourself, your family, your friends. That if you want another career, you will find one that nourishes your mind and your soul, no matter what it pays.
            I hope you will continue with this thread and let us all know how you are doing. This time, it gets to be all about you. :h
            New Birthday: May 8, 2010

            "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

            KO the Beast!!

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              #66
              How low can we go?

              Cinders,
              I've been thinking about you and found this thread tonight. Wow, you have been through a lot. I think of you as one of the "old-timers" here at MWO. You have helped me get sober one day at a time. I hope you find peace soon.
              Love and Peace,
              Phil


              Sobriety Date 12.07.2009

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