Crisis leading to relapse

[Changeling]

Been absent for a while - due to child in hospital.
Had a really difficult time and unfortunately did not have the strength to get through it without drinking
(a lot) Anyway, crisis over now and determined to get back to reality and address my problems.

I was doing well with a moderation programme where I allowed myself 21 drinks a week.
3 a day or 6 one day and 0 another. or whatever
Never a single drop more per week - it was working for me.
I found that knowing I was "allowed" these drinks meant that I didn't spend the day thinking about whether I was going to drink or not, and some weeks I drank much less than the 21.

I am really dissapointed in myself now - at a time when I needed to be strong and capable for my child I just went to pieces, and straight back to really heavy drinking.

I feel such loathing for myself
My husband is really disapointed in me as well, all this and Christmas coming up - feels so impossible.

[Mackeral]

Crisis leading to relapse

Hiya Changeling..

Try not to be too hard on yourself....I had a child in hospital for 2 weeks at the beginning of the year.....It is so worrying and stressful..
I hope he/she is ok now..

[Popeye]

Crisis leading to relapse

Changeling
Sometimes life overtakes us and we do things that we shouldn't. Nobody is perfect.
I know all about the guilt and shame when you feel that you have let someone down badly, but you can't alter the past. You have turned a corner and you're back in the fold. I hope that your husband can see how hard you are trying. Christmas is a trail for many, many people....it shouldn't really be....and the pressure can seem too much. I am giong to try and relax my way through it. Does that make sense?
I'll be thinking about you .

:l

[betty boop]

Crisis leading to relapse

Hi Changeling

I did something similar earlier in the year, my daughter was in hospital for a week having brain surgery, while we were in a didn't drink but the day we got home I was drunk for most of the day. You will get through this, life throws these things at us unfortunately........

Glad that things are ok for you now.

Paula :l

[weemelonhead]

Crisis leading to relapse

Hi changeling..my girlie has never been in hospital, but last year, the young man I look after who has special needs, had a VERY serious op and was hospitalised for some time......I love him dearly, and he's not even my son, but i used all my 'off' shifts to fill my face, so can only imagine the stress you are going through...Try not to beat yourself up, (HA!!!!) this must have been a very worrying time, but you seem to be travelling towards the other side and getting back on track...just congratulate yourself for this,and keep going...much love to you and your daughter

Melon

[jay42]

Crisis leading to relapse

hi
yep i know about relapse as ive relapsed myself , but the important thing to realise is that we CAN get through these relapses everyones circumstances is different i know but we all have strength inside and muster our inner resources and get through it
i wish you the best

[YoungAtHeart]

Crisis leading to relapse

Hi Changeling,

It's more important that you get up again than the fact that you slipped. Keep the faith, my dear. You will get up again and fight this fight!

[Changeling]

Crisis leading to relapse

Update

Many thanks to everyone that supported me in this thread.
Just a quick update, my son had a serious car accident but is receovering well now and was out of hospital over christmas.
He still has a long recovery ahead but is doing really well.
Thanks to the support here I am coping well and staying sober and strong for him (and for me)
first time in years I have got through something big without drinking to oblivion.
Thanks for being here everyone.
Happy New Year
Changeling

[Beaches]

Crisis leading to relapse

Thanks for the update Changeling. Happy 2007 and I hope your son gets well quickly.

[Ivygoodluck]

Crisis leading to relapse

Changeling,

That's wonderful news, both about your son doing so well and you coping very well! Especially since the holidays usually add stress to everthing.

Happy New Year and Congratulations!

Ivy

[Saint Jude]

Crisis leading to relapse

Changeling, so happy to hear the good news. A great way to start the New Year! Best wishes to you both:h

[betty boop]

Crisis leading to relapse

Thanks for keeping us updated changeling, a big :l from us

Paula xx

[Waves 2]

Crisis leading to relapse

:l :l :l :l

[Mary Anne]

Crisis leading to relapse

Changeling,

Glad your son is on the mend, and you are doing well also.............HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Today is my first AF day in a while, not feeling too well, but tomorrow wil be better.

Welcome 2007!!

:l :h

Love,

Mary Anne