RC's JOURNAL

[RingingCedars]

RC's JOURNAL

Thank you everyone. It really does mean a lot to be heard, supported and not judged. In fact your support brings more tears to my eyes. I am not anxious about the possibility of a visit from my Dad--more concerned that he won't ever be well enough to make the visit. I believe I could help him, but compliance is the issue. It just sucks that after all these years we finally find each other and both know in our hearts we've always wanted to be family. Life can be so cruel. I know, I'm not the only one with family issues and I've really done so well in spite of it all. I wonder more and more, what it's all for though. I try to be positive but I can't live with my head in the sand either. I know how dark this sounds, but it is where my heads at. At least I'm stopping at one bottle of wine and not 2 or 3. That's something.

[sick of being sick]

RC's JOURNAL

RC, I'm here for you, too. I think it is an excellent idea writing your feelings down. Just get the words, feelings and tears out! So many people love you and want to help, including me! Take care, my sweet friend. I hope you haven't left "The Journey" thread. Love ya, Vicki

[RingingCedars]

RC's JOURNAL

Be careful what you wish for puts knew meaning into taking life as it comes. I am now named executor of an estate that is worth nothing noteworthy. Never done this and after googling responsibilities, I think I'd rather not. Getting to know an absent father and his ways is more than I bargained for, to say the least. It's that balancing act in life, I suppose. Really grappling with conversations of the last 3 days. Always said I had a criminal mind(that I never acted on)and I should have been a lawyer. I can argue a point til the cows come home if I so desire. Have learned there isn't much point in that at the end of the day though. I speculate how I would have turned out with the example and tutoring under this person's influence. Nurture verses nature? Always a conundrum. Who am I? Why am I here? Perhaps I think too much? Who wouldn't? Thinking out loud to anyone who reads(and I suspect many will--if you're anything like me:H).
I believe I have chosen my path but the damn bumps in the road keep setting me off on detours. I need to jump the bumps and stay the course. Just how does one do that?

[RingingCedars]

RC's JOURNAL

Haha here's a thread where I can talk to myself and not feel bad if no one replies. How could anyone reply....it probably makes no sense to anyone else. I am well and thankful...it does not come without conscientious exploration though.

[RingingCedars]

RC's JOURNAL

Also thinking about many MWO'ers struggles. TWO, Guy, Beagle on the Trail, Spuds and so many others.....Nora, SSH, Effie, crazy treehouse lady....you've all been given a piece of my heart.:h

[beagle]

RC's JOURNAL

rc, i read you loud & clear.
i understand much of what you're saying.
like to read it too.

[sunshinedaisies]

RC's JOURNAL

RC - I am here for you too - I think it is a good thing to write things down on here - I just don't have the guts to do it. It can help to write things out - and sometimes what someone else says to you can make a HUGE difference to one!! As you know my dear friend - with something you said to me. So, write away and hopefully someone will say something that resonates with you. Even if you feel as if you are talking to yourself - it matters not. :l

Much love and many hugs dear RC

Sun X