I feel like I can't do this

[Tiredofit]

Not drinking is a constant struggle and It's pissing me off. I just want to be able to be AF and not think about drinking. I hate this and I want it to stop. I feel like a failure. :upset:

[daisy45]

I feel like I can't do this

Do something different; something you don't do when you are drinking. Exercise, swim, walk, read a great book, cinema, go to a show, walk on the beach and listen to the waves, get back to an old hobby or try a new one. You need to take action and make moves towards your AF life.
Tiredofit, I know how hard it is. I have been up and down constantly over this past year but I am going to beat this and every time I try I have to add another chink to my armour.
I hope you feel better soon; it's all part of the process. Stay strong and focus on that great life that is yours for the taking............

[mario]

I feel like I can't do this

Hi Tiredofit,
Have you got yourself a plan and goal as just wanting this monster to stop wont work,There is a tool box in the monthly abstenence thread which is a must read,Also as daisy says try getting some old hobbies back as i am sure the only hobbie you have the last few years was drinking,We all felt like failures at one time or another espeicially after drink but thats just the alcohol talking we are better than that and beating this can be done,keep postig and sharing your thoughts as we can all relate to what your going through,dont quit quitting :-)

[Doggygirl]

I feel like I can't do this

Hi Tired. I can sure understand where you are coming from. There was a lot of pain with stopping the madness for me too. The good news is that if you truly embrace the idea of sober living, and work towards real change inside yourself and in your daily living, the pain really will go away. Just stopping drinking didn't magically fix everything for me. I had to work at it.

A few examples of things that have really helped me include:

AA participation and making new sober friends
Volunteer work
Active involvement in helping other alcoholics

I hope you will start exploring to find your new passions. They might or might not be anything similar to mine - but I absolutely had to find passion for something other than AL.

Strength and hope to you,

DG

[Tiredofit]

I feel like I can't do this

Thanks everyone. I realize I cannot beat myself up over this. That means the evil wins and I cannot allow that. Going through today with yesterday behind and looking forward, not backward. It's so easy to give in. I've actually got a plan but sometimes I think a drink won't hurt. But it doesn't just become one drink. Daisy, I sooo wish I could walk on the beach. I'm from California originally and grew up near the ocean. I miss it, but the mountains are just as wonderful! Going to take the kiddos for a long cool walk in the fall. The colors are amazing right now!! Thank you so much!!

[Doggygirl]

I feel like I can't do this

Tired - those "just one" thoughts are VERY frustrating. It really helped me a lot just knowing that EVERYONE has them in early recovery. Everyone. I don't know anyone who hasn't gone through a lot of that. So 1) it's all a big fat lie and 2) if you hang in there, that voice will get quieter and quieter.

Have a good day - stick to your guns!

DG

[daisy45]

I feel like I can't do this

Well said DG; when I'm tempted to have a drink, I don't think 'I'll just have one or two'. I'm more like 'just tonight', because I couldn't contemplate not having my full whack. If I fall off the wagon for even 1 night, I buy and drink the 2 bottles. My struggle is not being able to leave it at one night. I can't see the point of having 1 or 2 glasses - that would be pointless to me. So with my wacky mindset you can understand why I'm here. All or nothing, so AF seems the only way for me.
Tiredofit, I am probably spoiled and don't appreciate enough where I live. We have the most beautiful countryside, mountains, lakes and beaches all within 10 to 30 minutes drive away. I'll take a walk on the beach this weekend and think of you.......

[K9Lover]

I feel like I can't do this

Tiredofit-
I completely understand what you mean about being consumed with thoughts of trying not to drink. "Normal" drinkers don't spend all day thinking about whether they're going to drink or not. It's not fair. But you know what's even more tiring than thinking of drinking? The actual WORK it became for me to keep drinking. Driving around town to different stores so I wouldn't be at the same one EVERY day buying a 12 pack of beer, the up and down all night going outside to smoke, the drunken texts and messages that I wouldn't remember the next day, the nauseating hangover all weekend...ugh, it just went on and on and on. Hang in there and try to find new things to do. I read, read, read...exercise, and watch a lot of TV and movies (that I actually remember the endings to the next day!)...all of these things have helped me re-focus. Yes, thoughts still enter my mind about drinking, but that's all they are. Things will get easier...and we're here to help you anyway we can
K9

[DriftyAlison0]

I feel like I can't do this

I understand where your coming from. Thing is, when you drink your going to struggle as well. It will just be worse because of the AL. Being AF will get easier with time as long as you don't drink.

[Seethepony]

I feel like I can't do this

Try baclofen.

[Lavande]

I feel like I can't do this

Hi Tiredofit!

Please take a look at this website: The ToDo Institute: Mindfulness, Procrastination, and Gratitude using Morita and Naikan Therapies
I've been a member there for many years but you can do some reading for free. Developing an attitude of gratitude really helped me get over this hump

Wishing you the best!

Lav