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    #1

    It Starts Today

    Hello All,

    I haven't been around in quite some time. I guess I was getting tired of hearing myself say I was going to change and then I didn't. Like a big bad broken record. So many failed attempts.

    Well after waking up with a horrific hangover and trying to get my 3 kids out the door for school I realized (and I have felt this way many many times) I CAN'T DO THIS TO MYSELF ANYMORE. Why am I choosing to live like this? Ugggghhhhh.


    I am really doubting myself. I can have such an amazing life but yet I am choosing to live it in a hungover state.

    I NEED TO MAKE A CHANGE TODAY.
    Tags: None
    #2
    It Starts Today

    Hi Meech,

    Welcome back, hun:l I won't give out a load of advise at the moment, just glad to see you're back and giving it another go to get rid of this dreadful addiction that hangs over us.

    J x
    :l
    It could be worse, I could be filing.
    AF since 7/7/2009

    Comment

      #3
      It Starts Today

      Thanks JC,

      I'm tired, very tired of this cycle. I really have to be strong and realize that there is no easy way out. Just have to do it no matter what. I can never just have one, never.

      Comment

        #4
        It Starts Today

        ooh and Meech, you're going to love this new thread.

        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...-co-52343.html

        and this one

        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...1756.htmlhttp:

        And of course another trip to the Tool Box.

        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

        J x
        :l
        It could be worse, I could be filing.
        AF since 7/7/2009

        Comment

          #5
          It Starts Today

          JC :l Thank you!

          Comment

            #6
            It Starts Today

            Meech GO YOU GOOD THING!!!!! hugs and support to you! xxoo
            HOUR BY HOUR, DAY BY DAY

            Comment

              #7
              It Starts Today

              Hi Meech--how are you today? Hope you join us in the Canuck & Co thread.
              Psalms 119:45


              ?Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.?

              St. Francis of Assisi



              I'm not perfect, never will be, but better than I was and not as good as I'm going to be.

              :rays:

              Comment

                #8
                It Starts Today

                Hey Meech,

                How are you doing today? I was wondering if you would like to join me with a 100 day commitment. I know it is a long time, but it goes so fast as I have found from past failures myself.

                Anyway hope you are feeling better today and feeling stronger to fight this.

                Comment

                  #9
                  It Starts Today

                  Day 1 Accomplished

                  Thanks Pink Angel, Ringing Cedars and Windy,

                  Yes I have been reading the Canucks thread I'll try to post there.

                  Pink Angel - hugs back to you too!

                  Okay Windy your 100 day commitment sounds so SCAREY, OVERWHELMING and at the same time AWESOME and WONDERFUL. What a nice thing we could do to our bodies and minds. I have big feelings of doubt - HOWEVER we can do it right??. Many people have. So why can't we?

                  How many days have you been AF? I managed Day 1 and feeling like I can tackle the day with energy and happiness. It's when I have done a few AF's and feel like I need to REWARD myself and things aren't soooo bad. Stupid Beast in my brain tricking me.

                  Talk to you soon. Yikes 100 days. I have never made that kind of committment before.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    It Starts Today

                    All the best and tons of strength sent your way, Meech!!

                    I know all too well about feeling great after a few AF days and wanting to reward myself by drinking. Absolutely NO logic in that for me! Did over and over and over again. Complete madness.

                    xoxo

                    Comment

                      #11
                      It Starts Today

                      Meech...

                      You asked how many days have I been AF and the truth is I had 5 beers last night, so that is why I have new resolve. I have done 30 days in the past, and honestly, I didn't think I could even do that when I started. For me 30 days was not enough. It didn't make me feel too different. I need more time and maybe forever. I know 100 days seems like a long time, but I can guarantee you January 5th will be here before you know it.

                      I have done other series of AF days too, so I know all to well what you are talking about when you mention "reward". I know too that the "reward" was a cruel joke. It was never one or two, but three or four, which makes me feel icky. Which is why I want to feel better.....And, I want you to feel better. Energy and Happiness - those are two great things that alcohol takes away from us....Not any more. We will have to blame it on the chocolate cake.

                      You don't have to commit to me for 100 days (although I would love your company), but I would love your support and I will support you as well on what ever you decide to do.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        It Starts Today

                        Today is the 100 Day journey

                        Hi Windy,

                        Well there was beer in the fridge last night so I had some. I don't feel too bad today. AND I refuse to beat myself up like I usually do because that won't fix anything.

                        Perhaps because I am thinking about this 100 day committment I panicked. So there is no beer in the house (or anything else).

                        I shall start today. DAY ONE TODAY.
                        And tomorrow it will be under a 100 days to go. I think you are absolutely right that you need 100 days to really get out of the routine, triggers etc....

                        PLAN
                        1. Stock up on gingerale today. I really do love it!
                        2. Repeat - NO REGRETS TOMORROW.
                        3. I work a little tonight (during the witching hours) so that should keep me distracted.
                        4. Have dinner ready when I get home from work, and eat immediately so I don't get those dreaded AL cravings on an empty stomach
                        5. Rest my sober head on the pillow tonight as I go to sleep poison free!

                        Meech

                        Comment

                          #13
                          It Starts Today

                          :wd:Hi Meech,

                          Boy of boy, do I understand "There's Beer in the fridge last night so I had some". Done this so many times, I finally got fed up. Monday night was my "there's beer in the fridge"....... I really think I am "fed up" this time. It feels right. I don't even like beer any more. (And I will keep saying that to myself.)

                          I think it is wonderful you want to join me for 100 days, but if that seem too much, I would completely understand....B..U...T...if you are ready.....then let's go, and go good.

                          I think your plan sounds good and reasonable. One point that really hits home for me is having something prepared for dinner so you don't get the dreaded AL cravings. That happens to me all the time. The cravings are much worse on an empty stomach. Don't you find that once you eat something, the cravings are more manageable? That is why I can't diet at the same time as getting the beast off my back. I need to, so my plan includes lots of exercise.

                          Sleeping poison free is amazing. I slept so good last night. Even when I have had only a few, I feel it the next day and my sleep is not the same. For me, the biggest reward is waking up with a smile on my face.
                          [/COLOR]
                          And I am going to try Ginger Ale. Thanks for the tip.

                          Comment

                            #14
                            It Starts Today

                            Hi meech welcome back :-)


                            :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                            Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                            I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                            This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              It Starts Today

                              Hi Mario,

                              thanks. It's about bloody time I came back too!!!

                              It's comforting to see many of you still here. Your support is muchly needed and appreciated. :h

                              Well here goes.....

                              Comment

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