Big Dose of Reality

[Tipplerette]

Big Dose of Reality

K9, I am fully confident you'll get through this without alcohol. I am sure you will use this timely reminder of exactly where alcohol leads as a reinforcement tool rather than a reason to drink.

My son works for the Government and needed his Secret Security Clearance and had to acknowledge his DUI. He was worried for a YEAR before he got the news that he passed his clearance. His fear was that his boss would find out, which she didn't. You would be surprised at the privacy regulations many companies enforce. Gov't of Canada really protects their employees and I hope this is the policy where you work.

In any event, most bosses are humans just like us. 99% of people would understand.

Stay strong, girl.

[sunshine_gg]

Big Dose of Reality

Tipplerette;1253500 wrote: K9, I am fully confident you'll get through this without alcohol. You are too smart a woman to receive this timely reminder of exactly where alcohol leads and not appreciate it a reinforcement tool rather than a reason to drink.

What Tippy said

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

Big Dose of Reality

K9 sorry this has come back to haunt you. That is the person you were, not who you are now. Being an alkie may be what we are but it doesnt define us as a person. Personally if I were hiring someone I would have more respect for someone who has fallen, picked themselves up, faced their demons head on and come out of the other side intact. It takes a special type of person who has the courage to achieve that, so hold your head up high, you are worth it. I am sure that you will look back on this as just another part of this amazing journey when you have that certificate with 'Notary Public' in your hand with your name on it.

[Chillgirl]

Big Dose of Reality

K9 I have known you from the boards since I've been here and one thing I love about you is that you are "Fiesty", you kick AL's ass when you have to and you've had some great AF time under your belt. Im glad you are proud of how far you have come because you deserve it.

The best part about the past is that its over, you are not the person who recieved that DUI and im not the person who smashed up cars and my own body whilst driving drunk. Alcohol wont haunt us for the rest of our lives, it will make us glad to be free and proud of our lives without it. NEVER give up the fight and get that 40 day nonsense out your head, you can do it, you just need to get your self belief back.

There is an phrase I read somewhere in a recovery book which is "we will love you until you can love yourself", lets also say we will believe in you until you believe in yourself :l

[Struggles 106]

Big Dose of Reality

Hey K9

PFFTTTTT! Water under the bridge! We all have ickiness in the past. I can imagine though how you felt, sort of a rehashing of the original shame? Blow it off-you're doing great

[nicelife]

Big Dose of Reality

You know what K9? It is as it is. We all have shit like this that comes back to bite us! Just last weekend I ran into someone from looooong ago who remembers I stripped naked and swam in a neighbour's pool in the middle of winter. We had to move after that little episode. I've been in the local rag for awful court shit and had to show my face to all those small minded twats who live to see who gets arrested and their name printed in the paper! No matter what girlie - you hold your head up and prance around as if you own the world! You deserve that considering where you are compared to where you've been.

Keep this one thing in mind - we ARE NOT our behaviour when under the influence! Sure we do shit, and create shit and feel like shit and treat people like shit..... The things that happen when life isn't so good does NOT (and should not) define who we intrinsically are!

I'd be telling the boss in a confident, honest way what is in the past. And, it is just that - in the past!

I've watched you for AGES and really admire your tenacity and resolve. You need to write a list of how different you are now to remind yourself of what was and what is. You're great!!!!

Strength and many hugs, Amanda.

[K9Lover]

Big Dose of Reality

Thank you SO MUCH everybody! I feel so, so, so, much better now....after I got over the first few minutes and the big *GULP* when I saw my past ONLINE staring at me again. I have to look at the positives, as you all have pointed out. Yes, I fucked up, but I handled it, and it was 11 years ago! My boss may never even see it...I only have to disclose the information onto the application that will be sent in to the State of California. My background check to get the job I have now was "held up" for 6 weeks because of my DUI's...and I still got the job. So I'm not too worried over it anymore. I think maybe it was "meant to be" that I went through this today, with my impending 40 days coming up.

On a brighter note, I went to my new doctor and I have to say I am highly impressed. She spent 45 minutes with me, and it was obvious she had carefully reviewed my medical records. We talked and talked about my alcohol history, my medications, etc. She's setting me up with a counselor, as that is one area I have not thoroughly explored (yeah, once I gave it a half-assed attempt, but gave up quickly). She took me off Xanax and put me back on Ativan. She also recommended that I go back on Celexa, which is for anxiety and depression. I told her I'm not depressed, and she recommended it anyway for more of a long-term solution to anxiety, rather than these benzos. So I feel good about her and our first meeting. Oh, and I got my DEPO shot...so I am all set. She wanted to do a pregnancy test just to BE SURE I'm not pregnant, and I told her "If I am pregnant, then it is a medical miracle. My only male contact is with my dog, and frankly, I think he's a bit fruitty". She cracked up at that. LOL

Thank you my friends for all of the encouragement today. I feel like I'm ready to face day 40...bring it on!

K9

[techie]

Big Dose of Reality

K9Lover;1253613 wrote: Thank you SO MUCH everybody! I feel so, so, so, much better now....after I got over the first few minutes and the big *GULP* when I saw my past ONLINE staring at me again. I have to look at the positives, as you all have pointed out. Yes, I fucked up, but I handled it, and it was 11 years ago! My boss may never even see it...I only have to disclose the information onto the application that will be sent in to the State of California. My background check to get the job I have now was "held up" for 6 weeks because of my DUI's...and I still got the job. So I'm not too worried over it anymore. I think maybe it was "meant to be" that I went through this today, with my impending 40 days coming up.

On a brighter note, I went to my new doctor and I have to say I am highly impressed. She spent 45 minutes with me, and it was obvious she had carefully reviewed my medical records. We talked and talked about my alcohol history, my medications, etc. She's setting me up with a counselor, as that is one area I have not thoroughly explored (yeah, once I gave it a half-assed attempt, but gave up quickly). She took me off Xanax and put me back on Ativan. She also recommended that I go back on Celexa, which is for anxiety and depression. I told her I'm not depressed, and she recommended it anyway for more of a long-term solution to anxiety, rather than these benzos. So I feel good about her and our first meeting. Oh, and I got my DEPO shot...so I am all set. She wanted to do a pregnancy test just to BE SURE I'm not pregnant, and I told her "If I am pregnant, then it is a medical miracle. My only male contact is with my dog, and frankly, I think he's a bit fruitty". She cracked up at that. LOL

Thank you my friends for all of the encouragement today. I feel like I'm ready to face day 40...bring it on!

K9

Love you Niner xxx

[K9Lover]

Big Dose of Reality

techie;1253618 wrote: Love you Niner xxx

:l Love you too Techie! :happyheart:

[Struggles 106]

Big Dose of Reality

You soung great K9

It's always great to find a good doctor. Sounds like a good plan.

Just to share-today a guy from out of town came into the office. We used to be "friends" more or less until I dug around and found his number -DRUNK-and called him at home.
He hung up right away and has nothing really to say to me now. That was a couple of years ago. I used to feel bad when he came in but now I just blow it off.
It's in the past and what he thinks of me is unfortunate but not relevant to my life now.
Of course I know he told others about it, but I can't care about that either.

So you sound great-you are doing so well! Being sober IS an altered state of consciousness!

[scottish lass]

Big Dose of Reality

K9 - I am so glad you like your new Dr, that is a big help.
I manage over 50 staff and I get background checks on all my hires. I also have to have driving records to approve them working. I do get to see some of my staff's DUI's - and I can let you know that for most of them, it only builds my respect of them - especially those who obviously have paid their dues and worked hard to make amends and life changes to ensure that it will never happen again. I rarely ever even acknowledge that I know this information, it bears no relevance to their work (now if there was work preformance issues, that would be different and again based on preformance not old records) - don't live in fear of your boss - we are human too! Don't make the errors of your past, that you have worked so hard on, become a bigger burden - keep moving forward...

[nicelife]

Big Dose of Reality

Hey again K9! I'm pleased you are feeling better.

Do yourself another BIG favour and don't give the 40 day heeeby jeeeebies any power at all. Just forget about it - plough right over it, stick your nose in the air and say FUCK OFF to it!!! It may have won in the past - BUT that was then and this isn't the past. This is the way forward - 40 days OR NOT!!! THIS IS your life NOW......

Be tough, take no prisoners and just keep on doing it!!!!

Biggest hugs ever, Amanda.

[looking for peace]

Big Dose of Reality

K9, you have done a great job putting this behind you and it probably won't be an issue in your notary public certification. This is a great lesson for all us that were fortunate enough not to get caught while under the influence. Thanks and good luck. Peace

[RingingCedars]

Big Dose of Reality

OH Niner sorry you've had a nasty flashback from your past but as everyone said it is a testimony to your true grit. Boy could I use a notary in the next little while. Too bad you weren't in Canada. Will be sending positivity your way that things go smoothly and if it doesn't work out then it is for a reason. Don't ya hate when people say that? lol Glad the doc situation worked out too. xo