February Free

[betterlife]

February Free

Just stopped in to say hello to everyone....tried to catch up on all the posts and sure find what I read very helpful, supportive and so very real!!.
Tomorrow is day 14 for me. I am feeling pretty good and plan to be AF all of Feb. I do think about the future and question my ability to moderate and I just get real scared....it never really worked for me in the past as I could always rationalize "just one more" ....and often "just one more" stopped when I could no longer keep my head off the table!! So for today... I love being AF!!!!
I check the MWO forums every day .....lurking around, reading whatever I can... getting advice and support from the posts. It has been a huge part of my success for the past 13 days.... thanks to each and every one of you!! Could not do it without all of you!!
Wishing you all great success in our Feb Free journey!!

[GingerDust]

February Free

Thanks everyone for your comments and support.

WW, that is kind of a pickle. You'll find a way to sort it out. Have fun at the cabin.

Congrats on 14 days Betterlife. Keep it up.

It's too early here. I think I'll go back to bed.

[Unwasted]

February Free

Good Morning Febbers,

Better Life, congrats on 14 days today......that's a strong start to be sure. Here's to hoping that you can continue beyond February, because going back to the constant and never-ending toruture of drinking.........trying to control it.........recovering from it............the mental battle...........does not go away or get better. However.........the struggle to be sober DOES get easier! I'm feeling more positive every day and now coming up on 90!

Best to everyone and wishing a wonderful AF month for you all!

[mama bear]

February Free

still sober here...taking antabuse...and honestly not even thinking about drinking for the moment...too damn busy...and that's a GOOD thing
Keep on rockin friends

[mylife]

February Free

Hello All, just checking in.

WW - what's funny is that when I was in my 20's living in California and going out partying with all my friends I really was a non-drinker. I just didn't like AL back then - I usually went along and nursed a light beer and put it down half empty at the end of the night. Now 20 years later when it would really be fine not to drink is when I have the problem...LOL. However, as UW said it is still such a socially accepted part of life that it's hard to get away from it 100%.

Better - Congratulations on day 14!

Still not drinking here and no plans to but waiting on my antabuse as a backup plan.

Have a great day all.

[GingerDust]

February Free

The antabuse just arrived. I won't take until morning, but it's finally here.

[mylife]

February Free

That's great Ginger!

[Unwasted]

February Free

Ginger, happy your shipment arrived - would you say it took two weeks?

[GingerDust]

February Free

Yes, Unwasted, almost exactly two weeks.

[GingerDust]

February Free

I guess it's in the rebel in me, but since I know I'm going on antabuse tomorrow, I've been drinking as much as I can. My capacity has been terribly diminished by the baclofen. I smoked today too, or really tried too, but that was terribly diminished by quitting a few weeks ago. My grand attempt to go out in a blaze of glory more resembles a fart. But I suppose that's fitting.

[sunshine_gg]

February Free

How's everyone doing during this fine, free February?
Still going strong here.. actually had a 'thought' today as I was passing the wine aisle at the store... gave my head a shake and soldiered on. Dumb ass stinkin' thinkin' :H

[NoraC]

February Free

Hello everyone.....I'm still here.

Ginger - I know exactly how you feel. I tried explaining that to my hubbie recently. Yes - I know I'm going to quit but I've got to go for that one last binge. Problem for me was that I would have the last night of drinking but not go to my plan the next day.

Anyway - I'm on Day 9 now. Had a few stray thoughts about what I'm going to do when February is over. Got to get that thinking out of my mind.

Ok - off to visit my parents in the morning. Can't wait to see them.

Take care everyone. :h

[Unwasted]

February Free

Good Morning Febbers,

Just stopping by to say hello - I'm still AF and working toward my 90 days. I think I'm finally getting a handle on this really being it for me. I don't have any plans to drink in the future and I'm not bargaining with myself. I think my logical brain is finally overtaking my alkie brain. It's a strange feeling at times, but I just don't see any way other than staying sober. I know deep down nothing good would come from drinking again. I know that my romanticized feeling about alcohol is false - it's that "euphoric recall" that Greg mentioned in one of his posts. Somehow I think all of our wants and needs get lumped into that missing alcohol.......that the feelings of loss or something missing are wrapped in the idea that a drink would make it all better. But, of course, we know it wouldn't. I read something recently about the neuroplasticity of the brain and how we really can get rewired if we stay off the booze long enough. That's my plan. I just know I can't go down that road again.

I've also been thinking about how depressed alcohol used to make me feel. Sure, I got that very short-term buzz in the evening, but the amount of time the next day feeling bad was crazy. My body would be trashed in the mornings and it would take until noon to be able to function. Even then I would still not feel well, and every movement felt like a struggle. You guys all know the feeling. It's hard to describe, but it was so horrific. All I have to do is relive that feeling and I know I won't drink anymore. And I sure can't imagne giving up all the time I've put in to get sober! I think I'm to to the point Jason Vale describes.........where I genuinely don't want it anymore. I still have twinges of something missing, but I'm hoping that goes away and that I can keep in mind that the feeling would be there regardless.....it's just part of life.

Ginger let us know how the Antabuse makes you feel physically. I keep meaning to ask Nora or K9 if it makes them feel any different.

Have a good AF day everyone! :lilheart:

[sunshinedaisies]

February Free

Hi there - UW - I feel as if I am chasing you around the site - LOL !!!

Nora - good for you on day 9 - do not worry about the end of Feb - just concentrate on feb for now - who knows - maybe YOU will start a March thread?? you know you can do it! Have fun at your parents.......
Sunshine - yes, those 'thoughts' are annoying - I was driving to work a few days ago and the thought popped into my head "I wonder if I have enough Guinness for tonight" which is absurd!! The second it popped in I thought "Heck - where did THAT come from" - but in my head it was! I ignored it of course but it shows how strongly the habit is in our heads.
Ginger - did you start your antabuse? Actually if you were drinking last night heavily, you should wait a few more hours to take it - but are you planning on taking it today? Don't think about it - just take it and done with - decision is made for you re drinking!
Mylife - good for you still being AF - when do you expect your antabuse? Do you think you will need it? i havbe some in my drawer that i have had for ages and don't think I will ever take it but I do know it is there....
Jan - Way to go still being sober - keep it up my friend!! :l
Betterlife - awesome on still being AF - isn't is wonderful to wake up and be clear headed and feeling good? I know today I thought just that when I got up - I felt SO good!
Sharky - how are you doing? Is your plan to mod or be AF? I know I can't mod - been there and tried that - doesn't work for me. I have to be AF. I know I have to get to the mindset of genuinely not wanting it - like UW said. I think I am on track with that too. Which feels good.
WW - gosh, that is some job - and going AF? Good for you. Sorry about your GF thinking you are a pretty boring person though - maybe she should reconsider her drinking habits? have fun at the cabin - sounds wonderful!
Allswell - have you checked out places like Whole Foods? I am sure there must be some sun blocks with no AL in them..... as far as having a reaction if you use one with AL - I have no idea but as Nora and UW said, try the meds thread....
SL - how are you doing today? Yes, the support here is wonderful - but how are you doing? Drop in and let us know - we are all here for you.....

I think this thread is great - and I too, am still Feb Free !!!

hugs to all,

sun X

[mama bear]

February Free

I am still Feb free, but must admit I miss my buddy Bud Light....need to work on that thinking
I am taking the antabuse, so that is a good thing
I just need to remember all this shit AL has caused me in my life
ROCK ON EVERYONE!!!!