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    #1

    Need opinions from you guys

    I just wanted to get some feedback from all friends here. As you all know I had some 107 days, then the slip, and now am almost at 4 months. On Feb 7th.
    I'm curious to know what you guys think about how I should proceed in terms of counting sober time.
    I realize this seems silly but to be honest I am inclined to consider the slip a really slight bump in my road to sobriety. Do you suppose this is denial? I don't think so actually; my
    commitment is as strong if not stronger and I did learn from it. It was almost as if I was watching someone else doing that just to prove how dumb it was.
    This is my go-to place for support and understanding, so I did change my signature to reflect the slip. I would never be dishonest with anyone, least of all myself, about drinking.
    I think I'll just go with the total time and add "with the small slip". This seems to be the best way to characterize what happened and where I am in an honest way.
    Thoughts?
    Tags: None
    #2
    Need opinions from you guys

    Sorry Ann, I think if you drink you go back to day one......and in regard to a "slip", "bump in the road" whatever you want to call it, it means that you did actually drink so your sober time ended there and you begin again. So, in reality you may have four months where you did not drink but you have not got 4 months sober in the truest sense of the word.

    I had to go back to day one after a very long time sober , but I did break it and I did drink so I cannot call it an AF stretch.

    I know some will not agree with this but it is my opinion, a slip means you decide to drink, therefore you go back to day one BUT not forgetting all the sober time that you did have, this just proves that you CAN do it and makes you all the more determined that this will not happen again in the future.

    Going back to day one is not easy but it is necessary I think to become accountable and honest with yourself.

    My 2 cents.
    "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

    AF 10th May 2010
    NF 12th May 2010

    Comment

      #3
      Need opinions from you guys

      Hi ANN
      I think its purely personal... do what you feel in your heart. if that is marking 4 months with a slip than thats fantastic... if it means starting at day 1 then do that. It does not take away what you accomplished by have a "bump" nor does it take away by starting at day 1. 4 months is amazing.. if everytime you look at the sober time on your signature you feel guilty then you know what you have to do. If not then leave it and mark it as a speed bump in the road of sobriety..

      caper
      caper
      AF since Sept 2013...
      :alf:

      Comment

        #4
        Need opinions from you guys

        one2many;1256429 wrote: Going back to day one is not easy but it is necessary I think to become accountable and honest with yourself.
        I think that's what AA does too. I agree, but on my own behalf. I had a long time sober and chose to drink. Now I've been a long time sober again. But if someone were to ask me, I say over 2 VS 3 1/2 years. And it wasn't a slip, it was a personal choice that didn't go well - I don't recall what yours was and it doesn't matter because it's a personal journey. When you get to 6 months and you hear congratulations, rah-rahs, you should be prouds and people who "hope to achieve what you have".... what will it mean to you? Will it feel right to lay claim to that? Regardless of all that, congratulations on your AF time - be it consecutive or otherwise.
        sigpic
        Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT

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          #5
          Need opinions from you guys

          I think the way to proceed is to track your progress in the most honest way that is meaningful to you. It's never about self punishment or disgrace. It's ALL about motivation. What will motivate you to keep on course going in the right direction.
          Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read

          Comment

            #6
            Need opinions from you guys

            Thanks!

            Thanks for the responses-makes perfect sense. I changed my signature and I already feel better!
            And grreneyes-I like the expression "lay claim to that". That answer was a NO so here I go again. I'm not going to regress, and I agree that this is the better way.

            It was a choice that's for sure. Noone held me down and forced that Corona down my throat.

            So day 18 today with many more to come.

            Comment

              #7
              Need opinions from you guys

              Ann221, I to agree that if you slip or have a bump than that's where your sobriety counting time ends,That is not to take away from what you have achieved but if being honest with oneself when asked when you last had a drink it has to be from the last time you had a drink.


              :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

              Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
              I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

              This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

              Comment

                #8
                Need opinions from you guys

                techie;1256453 wrote: I think the way to proceed is to track your progress in the most honest way that is meaningful to you. It's never about self punishment or disgrace. It's ALL about motivation. What will motivate you to keep on course going in the right direction.
                Agree with techie to


                :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Need opinions from you guys

                  Ann 221;1256455 wrote: Thanks for the responses-makes perfect sense. I changed my signature and I already feel better!
                  And grreneyes-I like the expression "lay claim to that". That answer was a NO so here I go again. I'm not going to regress, and I agree that this is the better way.

                  It was a choice that's for sure. Noone held me down and forced that Corona down my throat.

                  So day 18 today with many more to come.
                  Go for it Ann as you can well beat this :goodjob:


                  :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                  Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                  I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                  This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Need opinions from you guys

                    Good for you Ann! You go girl x
                    "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

                    AF 10th May 2010
                    NF 12th May 2010

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Need opinions from you guys

                      As someone said "to thine own-self be true".
                      Love and Peace,
                      Phil


                      Sobriety Date 12.07.2009

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Need opinions from you guys

                        cpn1004;1256470 wrote: As someone said "to thine own-self be true".
                        agreed.. Ann, I think you knew in your heart the answer to your question.

                        17 days is fantastic.. certainly nothing to sneeze about.

                        C
                        caper
                        AF since Sept 2013...
                        :alf:

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Need opinions from you guys

                          You did the right thing, of course!! Now we'll watch those days pile up again. Already day 18--that is really something!!!

                          :goodjob:TDN
                          "One day at a time."

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Need opinions from you guys

                            Well phooey! I was hoping to slide on that one-JUST KIDDING-I knew what I had to do. I was just trying to figure out how to not minimize it in my mind. I mean minimize the 3 months I had going on.
                            You gotta tell it like it is, so forward I go. One damn day at a time.

                            Day 18 and happy

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Need opinions from you guys

                              Hello Ann, you should be very proud of yourself - no matter what! I 'slipped' after 6 years sober. It was a choice and even though I had to go right back to day one I now see it as a positive. I know I just can't be a normie when it comes to grog - I'll never have to wonder ever again. Sooooooo, down the slippery slope I went back to day one, and even though I AM proud of the 6 years I had sober, I'm now sober AGAIN since Sept 9th, 2011. It is as it is.....

                              You did the right thing - IMHO.

                              :l
                              It is not what we do, but how much love we put into the doing.
                              Mother Theresa

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