Is this my Imagination or what?

[scottish lass]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Tip - well done for posting!
I managed to find an excuse to drink in Feb, a week later another one, then anotehr a couple days later. Decided to really aim for March - and had one glass on the 3rd, then a bottle on the 4th- good grief!! I have no idea what it is all about, but I am feeling so sad and so disappointed in myself! I thought I was winning, but looking back I am not really.
I will also aim for the 7 day mark as a good start. Whilst my resolve was high first thing Monday morning, when I was feeling rightfully crappy I threw the rest of the wine away - Monday evening I totally regretted it - but managed to hang in. Today is day 2 - and I have just (after reading your post) made a goal to reach 7.
Tip - we can do it! I am going to squash those nanoseconds!:H

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

You are my inspiration, I don't deserve this support. We have to find something, somewhere deep inside ourselves to get out of the wine rut. One day at a time. I don't have the option of throwing the wine away; we make ours and I would have to dump 40 bottles or so and hubby would divorce me even though we're only getting married in two weeks. I have to face it daily.

Stay strong...

[scottish lass]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Oh Tip - i recall you writing that before - that would be tough. There are a few poeple who have just posted about taking antabuse - they are having good results, they feeling (that nanosecond one) taht they know they can't drink and then the moment is past. I really don't want to take it, but when I read about their relief in not fighting any more,it almost seems as if it could be a huge release!
My parents made wine too, and I have never lived (or stayed) in a place without wine, or lots of AL - it is as routinue as buying milk - the habits of a lifetime are hard to break. Teaching an old dog new tricks is nothing to joke about. I really do wonder if I can do this, but I want to live a long, healthy life so got to work something out!
You are an inspiration to me as well - you have a lot going on, not to mention getting married - handling this at the same time is no easy task at all!
lets get each other to 7 days and then take it from there??

[Unwasted]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Hey girls, just stopping by to send you big hugs. :l

SL, I was going to ask if you or Tips had considered Antabuse. K9, Ginger, My Life, Nora, Windycitylady, Lady Lush, Mum of 2, and quite a few others are all staying sober with it. I bought some to have on hand for difficult situations like vacation.

I think you could take it for a year or two and be ok........Of course, I'm no doctor, but just sayin.......and, if you had reservations you could always have liver tests done. I don't know, it just seems like the people who've finally committed to taking it are now able to stay sober. It would give your brain a chance to rewire so that when you went off it you'd have a fighting chance.

Just a thought........

:lilheart:

[drinkingal]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Tipple you totally DO deserve the support. You know what failure is? It's when you give up and stop trying, and you have not done that. Please please don't beat yourself up, it is so counterproductive because it makes you doubt yourself. You can and will do this!

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

scottish lass;1275501 wrote: Oh Tip - i recall you writing that before - that would be tough. There are a few poeple who have just posted about taking antabuse - they are having good results, they feeling (that nanosecond one) taht they know they can't drink and then the moment is past. I really don't want to take it, but when I read about their relief in not fighting any more,it almost seems as if it could be a huge release!
My parents made wine too, and I have never lived (or stayed) in a place without wine, or lots of AL - it is as routinue as buying milk - the habits of a lifetime are hard to break. Teaching an old dog new tricks is nothing to joke about. I really do wonder if I can do this, but I want to live a long, healthy life so got to work something out!
You are an inspiration to me as well - you have a lot going on, not to mention getting married - handling this at the same time is no easy task at all!
lets get each other to 7 days and then take it from there??

You really do understand SL, not only do I have a very active social life, the wine is in the house all the time and I am able to convince myself often that sharing a bottle with hubby most nights is a GOOD thing. I have that nagging monkey on my back telling me it ain't so. I think he's a smart little monkey. Another negative thing I have noticed recently is that after that half bottle of wine, although I can have normal conversations, my brain seems cloudy. I have trouble following along with my own thoughts. Another reason to give it up.

Let's keep each other going. With us supporting each other and everyone else else's two cents, we should be able to do this.

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Unwasted;1275503 wrote: Hey girls, just stopping by to send you big hugs. :l

SL, I was going to ask if you or Tips had considered Antabuse. K9, Ginger, My Life, Nora, Windycitylady, Lady Lush, Mum of 2, and quite a few others are all staying sober with it. I bought some to have on hand for difficult situations like vacation.

I think you could take it for a year or two and be ok........Of course, I'm no doctor, but just sayin.......and, if you had reservations you could always have liver tests done. I don't know, it just seems like the people who've finally committed to taking it are now able to stay sober. It would give your brain a chance to rewire so that when you went off it you'd have a fighting chance.

Just a thought........

:lilheart:

i have held back from taking antibuse as I thought it was for hard core drinkers. My little wine habit seemed too mild to involve drugs. I have an aversion to drugs but from what you are saying as long as you don't drink antibuse is relatively harmless??? I would consider it, definitely if that were the case.

UnWasted, at the beginning how did you handle the urges? What was your coping mechanism?

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

drinkingal;1275522 wrote: Tipple you totally DO deserve the support. You know what failure is? It's when you give up and stop trying, and you have not done that. Please please don't beat yourself up, it is so counterproductive because it makes you doubt yourself. You can and will do this!

thanks Drinking Gal. What bothers me is that as much as I have a great life and consider myself to be successful in the areas that are important to me like having healthy relationships with friends and family, being well read on the subjects that interest me, being in a committed, amazing 'marriage', etc... I feel so disgusted with myself that I can't seem to get a handle on the daily drinking. It has improved immensely but to have a body free of alcohol for at least 30 days seems to be unattainable for me and I know it's all in my mind. BACKBONE is something I would sell my soul for... or at least a good piece of jewellery...LOL... I don't want to be 'comfortably numb' anymore.

It's all up to us, Drinking Gal, no one can do this but us. I will never stop trying so I had better get this show on the road ... I read somewhere that when your life is over and you are asked what the focus of your life was, wouldn't it be sad to answer "I spent most of my adult life trying to stop drinking." That's where I am heading if I don't smarten up.

[drinkingal]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Tipple I was reading something recently about will power (some thing I felt I had none of but have shown myself time and again I have more than I realise!) is that if you plan something in the future it is more likely to be successful because your brain processes it in a more positive way because you have time to get mentally "ready" for it on a subconscious level. I'm wondering if that wouldn't be worth a shot? Maybe you could set e.g. Sunday as your start date and allow those few drinks a day without guilt until then while being aware of the upcoming start date? I've been practicing this myself with a recent drinking reduction goal and I just seem to feel more ready and focused as the day approaches.

[Unwasted]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Tipps, I'm extremely anti-medication and I can't speak to the safeness of Antibuse. I wasn't a hard core drinker either, and I don't thing many of the people here taking it are. I think many of us are just 3-5 glasses of wine every night kind of women who have developed a problem. That was enough, though, for me to feel like my life was in a shambles. And, I couldn't take it or leave it. Once I had one drink I didn't want 10 but I sure didn't want to stop at 1. I could tell a craving was triggered that felt beyond my control.....

I don't know how to answer the question about the safety of Antabuse, but I'd be willing to bet it's no more harmful than a lot of other pills people pop on a daily basis. I could be wrong, though, and have never researched it. I guess I'm just saying that if I really wanted to quit and couldn't, no matter what category of alkie or problem drinker I was, I'd be willing to take the chance on it. If I planned to take it for more than a few months, I would have my liver checked periodically. I think Ginger plans to take it for two years.

I know taking something is a very individual decision and I understand your concern because it's the same as mine. But, I also think alcohol causes cancer........So, taking Antabuse for six months to a year might even be less harmful than alcohol. Who knows? Now, I guess if your lifestyle is such that if you thought you'd just go back to it even after an extended period of time that's different.

Only you know yourself/your life. I've just seen you struggling for a long time. My Life was the same way and she finally realized she had to try something different.

Regarding cravings.......at the beginning I ordered the MWO starter kit, the All One Powder, The Kudzu and drank tons of water with lemon. I juiced vegies and tried to eat super healthy. I indulged in candy and still do. I remember eating a lot of it as a kid and don't see it as all that bad as long as I'm balancing it with healthy vegies and fruits.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the best. I can promise you one thing....struggling to be sober is light years better for me than struggling through sleepless nights and hangovers every day. I truly believe I was making myself fundamentally sick with alcohol even though I wasn't drinking a lot by most alkie standards.

I think the toughest thing for you is your social life. I'm lucky right now to be able to avoid situations like you're in (sounds like daily if not weekly). I don't know how you'll reconcile that to trying not to drink. That's why I thought the Antabuse might be an answer for you since it would take drinking totally away as an option.

Sending you peace and strength :lilheart: - and just FYI, I'm coming up on four months in a week........it hasn't been easy but it's easier than struggling with alcohol and EXTREMELY worth it!

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

I was lying in bed today thinking about your four month anniversary as I remembered your quit date... (stalking you as I am LOL) and am so very happy for you. I really respect the fact that you stuck to your decision and made it through every day without caving. You have enormous perseverance and are a fine example for us all.

I actually now am considering antibuse. This monkey on my back is a really soul sucker. River Pharmacy, here I come.

[Unwasted]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Tipps, you could always PM one of the many people here who are taking it. I'm sure they'd be happy to give you more information. Here is a post from K9 about it - she just posted it this morning in the Nest:


Antabuse: I have been on (and off) of it for about 2 years so if anybody has any questions I'm happy to help. I truly believe it has saved (and is still saving) me. Some may view it as a "crutch", but I am all for using any tool available. It takes away the inner angst, I simply can't drink. It has gotten me off the mental roller-coaster, and for that I am thankful everyday. But it's not a magic pill, it still takes work and a committment...........A quote from a book always stands out for me "You never have to drink again, even if you want to".


Thinking of you. I feel your pain, believe me, I do. Just know that you can have a much better life.

[Tipplerette]

Is this my Imagination or what?

River Pharmacy states that antabuse is not available to Canadians. I will go on the medication thread and ask there. This is probably the route I will go.

I envision the JOY, SELF-SATISFACTION, PRIDE & HEALTH that awaits me in my non-drinking future.

Thanks again.

xoxo

[Unwasted]

Is this my Imagination or what?

Good Luck Tipps. Let us know how you do. :lilheart:

[scottish lass]

Is this my Imagination or what?

I am wavering about antabuse - like said here, I never thought it was for me. Interetsingly a bottle of wine a week makes us heavy drinkers by the health care industry - and yes AL can cause cancer. I was drinking about 7 times the limit to be catergorised as a heavy drinker (on average a bottle a day - sometimes more/sometimes less!). I also have a very successful career, have two great daughters, am not a slacker by any means - and could drink and maintain it all!
I am definately considering antabuse when I am reading the success that peopel are feeling with it - I feel so great today (day 3) and wish I could maintain this feeling (not witching hour yet ). I also hate taking meidcation and avoid like the plague - strange when I happily pour poison down my neck nightly.
I may do some research/reading this weekend and really think about going to the next step.