Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

[SKendall]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Rags having experienced this with my own father, now passed denial of their reality seems to be a common denominator. Cindy is going through a similar situation and it's tough.

I hope the Rags family takes a more proactive role.

Good Luck.

[Rags]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

byebyebridgetjones;1271580 wrote: Yes.
Yes it is.....
Family is in denial because that's what humans do at first 'member?? (see Elizabeth Kubler-Ross)
Long term plans need to be made for Grandfather Rags ASAP.

Suggest a consult and advice with ACAT (Aged Care Assessment Team)
Sydney numbers below.


Aged Care Australia - ACAT Finder - Matching ACATS



The Raggs kiddies will have to deal, because if he has a bad fall it will not end well and he'll go into care in a worse state, with a worse outlook, probably in a worse environment........ urgent admission take what you can get scenario.....THEN he'll be complaining about the curry ingredients......
He might also pull someone else over with him.....not fair on anyone....seen it happen a squillion times.....

Thanks Bridge.




Flood waters not lapping at your door then Bridge? Good.
How about you Tawn? Got sandbags ready? How is that drain you dug last year?

[Rags]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

SKendall;1271682 wrote: Rags having experienced this with my own father, now passed denial of their reality seems to be a common denominator. Cindy is going through a similar situation and it's tough.

I hope the Rags family takes a more proactive role.

Good Luck.

Thanks darling :h



It'd be different if it was my dad.

[RedThread12]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Just popping in to say hi. I lurk on your thread, you wise and witty ones down there. But I just feel so, umm . . . invited . . . by "doodyhead." :H:H

Rags, I can relate to your frustration. Just don't let his crazy make you crazy.

I currently have 3 family "elders" that my sister and I run around like plate-spinners in the circus to try to care for. My Mom, 84, has contracted the world's weirdest disease that reduced her physically and cognitively by 50% in about 6 months. When she's feeling really badly, she's sweet and loving - the mom I never had, actually. When we find things that make her feel better, her judgmental, mean nature returns - the one that prompted her to introduce me to the guys who recently moved her and my 95 year old step-father into a new house as "RedThread, my youngest and meanest daughter."

Then my step-father went into the hospital, and now my 92 year old aunt (childless), is swelling up with water from congestive heart failure. She's also almost deaf and blind. However, she hasn't been to a doctor since she was 5, and isn't about to go the medical route now, so all we can do is try to make her more comfortable.

All I can say is that life is waaaayyy more than I could have anticipated!! But I'm actually doing pretty well in all of this, and I think I have to give some credit to being sober with baclofen. Glad I got that whole being drunk all day thing behind me before all of this started!!

So to you, Rags, and to the rest of "youse" (I learned that from youse, 'ya know) underoos, just :thanks: for helping keep MWO bright and alive.

[Miss Behaving]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

I'm a little worried about Sebastian ....... he has the cares of the world on his shoulders at the moment, and all these negative vibes are going his way. I think we should do some creative visualisation about him as a competent, caring and reliable 20-year old before we completely wreck his life :H:H After all he is a bhuddhist and with Raggsy in charge of his spritual eduation he cant help turning out all right

Rags - you have my total sympathy. I've sent you a PM

[tawnyfrog]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Hey Red - great to see you here. How's that nephew going? Did he get his cowboy boots for Christmas?

My thoughts on the Oldies. My dad died eleven years ago, so no longer in the picture. When it became apparent that my mum could no longer look after herself, I offered for her to move in with me up here in the sticks. Although she used to love visiting for a day, the thought of living here permanently filled her with dread. She couldn't handle the lack of fences, street lights, locks etc. She's a city woman at heart. To this day I'm eternally grateful that she declined my offer.

When we're aware that they can no longer function adequately I think it's actually irresponsible NOT to place the oldies in an Aged Care facility. We know they're not going to 'get better'. To stall the inevitable is delusional and, potentially, quite cruel. Do we really have to wait until they do have a major fall or set the kitchen alight or .....??? So Rags is on call at the moment. But Rags has to sleep at some stage. Or go to the shops. I'll wager my last vented mandrel and say that if the shit's going to hit the fan, it'll happen when the carer's off, even briefly.

I'm glad the siblings and I agreed on the best course of action and found a great facility with 24-hour care. There are qualified and compassionate in-house staff who look after mum with dignity and respect. She has help with showering and getting dressed. A really lovely young woman removes the odd stray facial hair. There is a GP on call, a chemist and hairdresser in the building. The meals, whilst not gourmet, are adequate and clean. She is centrally located to still have friends and family visiting and keep appointments for regular check-ups at hospitals and dentist etc. The list of good things goes on and on ...

She's in her fifth year now and her biggest complaint is about some of the other residents: "Those two old boilers are so stupid I just want to slap them".

Guess they're everywhere. :H:H:H

(I better add: This is, of course, my humble opinion only)

[tawnyfrog]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Miss Behaving;1271766 wrote: I'm a little worried about Sebastian ....... I think we should do some creative visualisation about

Nah. How about we just withhold his tofu?

[byebyebridgetjones]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Miss Behaving;1271766 wrote: I'm a little worried about Sebastian ....... he has the cares of the world on his shoulders at the moment, and all these negative vibes are going his way. I think we should do some creative visualisation about him as a competent, caring and reliable 20-year old before we completely wreck his life :H:H After all he is a bhuddhist and with Raggsy in charge of his spritual eduation he cant help turning out all right

Bugger Sebastian....he's living out the karma he created......

Hiya Redthread and Hiliary......B'Jesus this is a hot topic about the oldies innit???
I think I might have sounded a bit nursie harsh before, but I also meant that ACAT may be willing to come in and tactfully introduce the conversation....just plant the seed as it were....so much easier for a starnger to probe than a family member sometimes. Especially when the ACAT folk deal with this issue more often than any other.

Other thing I thought is that, after initial resistance, a lot of oldies enjoy the experience of being with folk their own age/interests....outings activities etc...

[MumOfTwo]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Rags;1271670 wrote: Sebastian has a lot to answr for... And he's only 8

Lil MoJo is 8 as well, can we blame them together ??? (She has a lot to answer for as well..my grey hairs, my wrinkles..oh actually that may be the 13yr old and Mr MoJo... LOL)

[myhappyplace]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Bridge, I dont think you sounded harsh, I thought I sounded harsh. I just know we are on the brink of the same with my FIL. And that regardless of being in another state, Mr Happs will be called upon as the eldest to step up. Will be interesting to see what the medical opinions are like after the upcoming surgeries on his knee. And the 6 weeks in hospital....

And Tawny, I think the fact that you and your siblings making the choice with time on your side for your Mum is so much better than a last minute scramble of get 'em in anywhere that will take 'em. This also I can see in our future because no-one thinks FIL will need to be taken care of. Most of all him.

[myhappyplace]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

And I am wondering too if its such a hot topic because we all have reached a certain age...or rather our parents have?

[myhappyplace]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Now from the grown up to the totally childish. Just involved myself in a round of email tit for tat with one of the giraffes. Finshing with something like "I wont do it, you cant make me, nanananananah...." I shall now go and play with Sebastian my new BFF...

[byebyebridgetjones]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

myhappyplace;1271792 wrote: And I am wondering too if its such a hot topic because we all have reached a certain age...or rather our parents have?

Exactly it....and we're just starting to get our kids to independance, and thinking 'Now I can sneak off and do XXXX'.....when the next responsibility toddles along on a frigging Zimmer frame....then you deal with that chapter and your on a bloody walker yourself.....I'm just glad I followed my instinct to do my thing when I was young. Study, career, tell everyone you're off to Europe for a coupla months and write to them from India 3 years later, stoned, telling them you've been asked to ride a horse through the bloody Middle East:H:H:H

[coriander]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

righto, who is Sebastian & wtf has he got to do with the price of tea in Brisbane?
hope you're all well, my parents are (I think).
nice days here currently, doing more horse-riding.
isn't it funny how missing the "s" in horse riding adds a whole new twist to the sentence.

breaking news:
a) Rosie not preggers
b) mare not preggers.

well shave my head & call me a penis, do ya think a fucking vet might be able to get her own animals pregnant???? ( well, actually, in the terms of the sentence, no, but you get my drift)

thus feeling :
a) inadequate
b) irrelevant &
c) insignificant.

pah.

save me from myself.

good news ; just spoke to reggie on the phone & he brightened my day.

just like when :
a) Missy called me
b) Bridgee, Sunny & G-bloke have all pm'd me &
c) Ragsy, happy & Mof2 pm'd me.

such are the finer things in life. the little, quirky, strange, cosmic things.

[tawnyfrog]

Underoos, Doodyheads and internationalistas

Oh Beags, so sorry to read about that. I know how much you wanted your girls to be preggers. I can't remember - is the mare being AI'd or serviced? I think this was the second time around?

Maybe Rosie doesn't like her potential paramour because she rooly rooly fancies the ill-conformed kelpieX with the overshot jaw two farms across???

Glad Reggie and sundries can brighten your day. They often do mine, said she, dropping to the bottom of the grammar class ...