I come back !

[dixon]

Hi all,
After a long silence I am coming back to this forum.Now I have lost my family and they are in refugee camp am living alone since last May 2011.I tried to be AF many times but failed.I have now realised I would be homeless and come to the street if I still continue drinking.

I have a strong desire not to drink at all and feel positive even in one day AF but feel suicidal and violent once started drinking and end up with memory loss.I have done several texts threatening to my wife when got drunk.She reported police and it made me socially isolated .....I used to drink alone and go for gambling .I am now running out of my bank balance which I brought from my native country to buy a house here in London...

OMG what to do ?? I tried medication as well but ended up with fatigue and laziness.I am now going to lose my job as I do not have concentration at work and doing always wrong...

This is the final stage for me so I am thinking to live somewhere in holly place like church or any paying home where I can get AF friend or support.I am not eligible for benefit so want to pay for a room .Does anyone has an idea where can I find this place in LONDON please ?
Finally, I want a person who can suggest me not to do so while I am feeling thirsty.To whom I can talk over telephone and share my thoughts as well.
I have got a warning letter from my employer as well.
Thanx for your suggestion,
Dixon

[fennel]

I come back !

dixon;1272377 wrote: Hi all,
After a long silence I am coming back to this forum.Now I have lost my family and they are in refugee camp am living alone since last May 2011.I tried to be AF many times but failed.I have now realised I would be homeless and come to the street if I still continue drinking.

I have a strong desire not to drink at all and feel positive even in one day AF but feel suicidal and violent once started drinking and end up with memory loss.I have done several texts threatening to my wife when got drunk.She reported police and it made me socially isolated .....I used to drink alone and go for gambling .I am now running out of my bank balance which I brought from my native country to buy a house here in London...

OMG what to do ?? I tried medication as well but ended up with fatigue and laziness.I am now going to lose my job as I do not have concentration at work and doing always wrong...

This is the final stage for me so I am thinking to live somewhere in holly place like church or any paying home where I can get AF friend or support.I am not eligible for benefit so want to pay for a room .Does anyone has an idea where can I find this place in LONDON please ?
Finally, I want a person who can suggest me not to do so while I am feeling thirsty.To whom I can talk over telephone and share my thoughts as well.
I have got a warning letter from my employer as well.
Thanx for your suggestion,
Dixon

Dixon, I have wondered often how you were faring. Here in the states, many of our employers have something called "Employee Assistance Programs"...considering you are in the U.K., where social programs are way ahead of ours, you must have something similar...can you admit to your boss what is going on and get assistance through your employer? In the states, many of us can obtain rehab through our employers.

Please update...

Take care.

[dixon]

I come back !

HI

Hi Fennel,

You still remember me ! I feel that am at your heart.Yes there are some drop in centres and still am not interested to be treated publicly as I have a hope that I can quit it.I have to show the society that am not an alcoholic but the incident with my family happened due to some misunderstanding.Really wanted a very nice volunteer /supporter whom I can share my thoughts ....
I will try to find if there is any employee's organization as you suggested.

At the same time one of the woman is falling in love with me.She is a divorced one and very sincere never tried a drop of alcohol.I feared that would not go smoothly if I wont give up this
deadly habit.Further she loves me too much and she never seen me in a violent mood.
What to do ???
Thanks
Dixon

[fennel]

I come back !

Please don't get into a relationship now. You really need to get yourself sorted out, Dixon. I know that the excitement and newness of it would be a pleasant distraction, but not for long.

[rubywillow]

I come back !

I remember you too. There's work to do, my boy, but there's help here too. Keep working, OK?

[dixon]

I come back !

fennel;1272628 wrote: Please don't get into a relationship now. You really need to get yourself sorted out, Dixon. I know that the excitement and newness of it would be a pleasant distraction, but not for long.

I am now decided not to act when am drunk...you are really with me.I need to sort out me , but am worried if something would go wrong with my relationship ,or if my wife engage with someone it would be a tragedy again as I never thought of another marriage life so it was happened... How do I let her that I am going to correct me and need her support and assurance as well ? your suggestion are really helpful!!
Dixon

[dixon]

I come back !

Hi Rubby ..

rubywillow;1272666 wrote: I remember you too. There's work to do, my boy, but there's help here too. Keep working, OK?

I got your very nice suggestions on my another thread.It really touching my heart ,but cant give up the Boozing cause always feel lonely and there is no one for me ..it became my time pass. When wake up after a sleep,I feel to much regret and start weeping and hardly go for work...what an accident happened in my life which now I think not repairable... Rubby, I have seen that you are giving such a big time for this forum so its better to stick with you .You have also raised a helping hand to me and interested to do more ,If possible I would like to talk with you over phone as well ...Many thanks
Dixon

[dixon]

I come back !

How to live alone ?

I am wondering how can I live alone without my family in abroad ? I feel a shame with other people and left any contact ..I cant leave my kids here and go back to native country.I am really worried about their education and thinking they will be suffering from depression very soon.
I am also worried aout my wifes life she could be cheated by other people exploiting her velnaribity she is also living in aborad with two kids of 10 and 14 of age ,if we will re united there would be no love and respect at all between us and the life will be ruined more.

What to do folks ??

Dixon