Need advice

[InChains]

Back again and I need advice/help in trying to decide how best to stop, specifically whether it would be easier/better to cut down a little more slowly or just go AF and get it over with quickly. I drink on average about 10 units a night, sometimes more, sometimes 1 or 2 less (usually when hungover). I have tried stopping in the last week, had one beer to try and take the edge off the cravings but still suffered greatly from depression afterwards and generally felt pretty bad. I don?t want to sabotage myself by trying to take on too much of a challenge and making it harder for myself, but I also don?t want to keep in the habit of drinking if that?s going to end up continuing. I know a lot of people have been in worse situations than I am now, but would appreciate advice from anybody as this is really starting to get out of hand? thanks in advance

xIC

[mylife]

Need advice

In Chaines - have you thought about a rehabilitation center? It might be best in order for you to get through those feelings and withdrawal in the beginning. If that's not an option what about calling a local AA chapter? You don't even have to go there - they will offer advice over the phone as well.

I don't know your situation completely, but for me I just had to make a mental committment and set a date to go Alcohol Free. And, of course it's important to have a plan in place. There are as you know all kinds of meds available to help you - look on the meds threads.

Sending you peace and strength. :l

[LibraryGirl]

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IMO, the easiest way is AF. In fact, there is no other way. Once you come here, you have had enough problems with AL. Moderating is a fantasy and not doable. Don't even try it. Stop AL completely and make this your Day 1.

I have only 18 days AF, as of today. I am a newbie too. Feel free to inbox me, and we can talk about whatever you like.

[InChains]

Need advice

mylife: thanks, I can't take meds or do anythign that would alert my family to the fact I'm having problems (I still live at home with my mother, brother and sister) so a rehabiliation centre is out too. I have tried repeatedly to stop lately, but commiting to going AF has just gotten harder after eveyr failed attempt (about 3 in the last month, lasting at most 2 days each), hence why I'm considering cutting down slowly and trying to make this work that way.

LG: trust me when i say, I know what you mean about moderating, I've been attemptign to moderate on and off for 3 years, the reason I say on and off? because moderation inevitably ends for me in 'another won't hurt'. I'm really just tlaking about cuttign down slowly to go AF instead of doing it suddenly. Thanks for the offer of someone to talk to, and I hope you'll keep me updated on how you're doing

[Supercrew]

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I tried the cut back method many times over the last 10 years, and I always ended up drunk and depressed and back to square one. The only thing that worked for me was going cold turkey, no booze, no drinking, no excuses. It was something that I had to do 1 day at a time in the beginning, and it took about 4 days to get the physical alcohol withdrawal out of my system, and I was still failrly depressed and in a blur, then it took about 6-8 weeks to really lose the obsessive thoughts of alcohol.

I woke up everymorning and promised myself that no matter what I would not drink today. Sometimes that meant going to bed at 8:00PM, but then I would wake up and promise myself that I would not drink at all that day. During that time I logged into a recovery forum about 10-20 times a day and posted and researched why I drank the way I did, and what alcohol did to my body, and I researched every method of recovery possible. Basically I became as knowledgable as I could on the subject of alcohol addiction and recovery. As the days passed it got easier, and as I learned more I became more self aware of why I wanted to drink even though it caused me pain. It ended up being a very rewarding experience, but I stayed focused on staying sober and healthy and happy throughout the process.

Anyone can do it, you just have to commit and decide that you will stay sober today no matter what, and then wake up tomorrow and do the same thing again. You have to retrain your brain and your actions, to think like a sober person, basically tyaking you back to where you were before alcohol entered your life.

Good luck!

[spacebebe01]

Need advice

From what I know stopping drinking form 10 units is probably not going to be dangerous, do you get dt's? if so you should get medical advice.
I have stopped by reducing but I was drinking around 30 UK units a day and didnt have time to wait for another detox, and I coulnt of done it alone, I had to stay in someones house and they measured out the drink for me because I would have just drank the whole lot in the morning then gone off to get more , so it is not an easy option at all, its really for people who it would be dangerous to just stop..

[InChains]

Need advice

space: I know its not dangerous for me to stop, its more from the point of view of whats easiest given how low my mood gets when I'm stop suddenly

[Doggygirl]

Need advice

Hi Inchy. I'm so glad to see your post and to know that you are continuing this fight. The only way for us to fail is to quit trying!

What sort of tapering down plan were you thinking about Inchy? Something like cutting back by 1 unit per day, or per week? Just curious. It sounds like getting through the very uncomfortable and difficult cravings is the real concern. If your cravings are anything like mine were when I quit, there would really be no way to "outrun them" with a taper down plan that I can imagine. (but you may have something in mind I haven't considered!) Also, the reality for me is that I can't control how much I'm going to drink on a consistent basis, so tapering down to a moderate level of drinking (much less tapering slowly down to 0) just wasn't a workable option for me. Ripping the bandaid off quickly (just suffering through the abstinence cravings) was the only way that worked for me.

I like Mylife's ideas about some local support. It's really a wonderful thing.

Good luck to you and keep us posted, OK? :l

DG

[InChains]

Need advice

fast realising tapering down is a bad idea, unfortunately supplies for this were purchased in advance and so of course tonight I shall be drinking the lot, for my own good you see, ahh AL logic is such an ugly thing. Tapering down is of course, illogical, if I had free choice over how mcuh iw as goign to drink I wouldn't actually be on this forum...

in terms of what actualyl goes on when I quit, and if anybody can advise me on how to deal with this, total mental and physical exhaustion, depression, anxiety, irritability, nightmares, nausea, cravings and lately a very slight tremor which is a nightmare for an illustrator but what can one do eh?

[bird]

Need advice

Inch, the only thing that ever worked for me long term was antabuse. Perhaps you could have it sent to a different address so your family wouldnt know.

[spacebebe01]

Need advice

Inch I also take antabuse to stop me drinking and low dose bac to help with anxiety. I dont know how you feel about meds. apart form that there are things you can do to help with your mood ect but they are all going to take time, I dont know if you can do that, I couldnt which is why I went with the meds, every time I stopped drinking my depression,, anxiety, anger and all the other things would just lead me straight back to drink. You should look round and have a good think about how your going to manage this, make a rough plan. Your doing well thinking about it now, good luck

[LibraryGirl]

Need advice

I still have horrible irritability and some depression, but not nearly as bad as when I was drinking. The anxiety levels have plummeted the most drastically since I quit. Most of what you are documenting is directly related to drinking, not abstaining. You may notice them more accutely when you first go AF, but trust me, they do go away, and are much, much less of a problem than with AL.

You have proven that tapering is not something you can do, as you admitted you are going to drink all the AL you bought for that purpose. So give up on that idea right now. Make it a clean break. Post here every hour if that's what it takes to quit, and get through the symptoms. It worked wonders for me. I drank every day for 12+ years, and have drank regularly without so much as a two week break for nearly 30 years. If I can quit, you can too.:l

I started taking some supplements, but don't take them much at all now. I didn't use Antabuse or any other presciption medication, although I wanted valium badly. I admit I wanted it as a substitute, but could never get a damn doc appt, lol.

Anyway, keep at it, and no buying any more alcohol for you Missy!:H We want you to succeed.:h

[Doggygirl]

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Inchy, is there any way you can see a counselor or doctor who is knowlegeable about addiction? An assessment by someone who really knows how to go about it is the best way to try to sort out your chickens and eggs. With anxiety and depression - sometimes they are CAUSED by alcohol, and other times they developed on their own. A good doc could help you sort that out. I was lucky that those god awful symptoms I felt in spades when I first stopped were related to drinking. It took several months for me to really feel well. But my depression (I was suicidal) etc. improved getting off the booze.

The bottom line is that there WILL be a lot of discomfort at first. I think the level of discomfort varries for all of us, and like space said, for some it can be supremely difficult. Lots of people have been successful with help from the meds here. worth a look for sure!

I found I had to be open to anything in order to finally quit.

I am so glad to see you being really honest with yourself about your inability to control your drinking. It took me a LOOOOOONG time to get honest with myself. It was only when I started that level of honesty with myself that I was able to start getting better. Good for you Inchy.

DG

[Nursie]

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Inchy, when you're done, you're just done. You commit to the discomfort and look to the rainbow that is on the other side.
Don't your friends and family KNOW you have an issue? I always thought I was being so sly, but they all knew. And I'm sure they love you and want you to break these chains.

[startingover]

Need advice

Nursie;1278923 wrote: Inchy, when you're done, you're just done. You commit to the discomfort and look to the rainbow that is on the other side.

Nursie put it so well Inchy.
Its a mindset and thats how it was with me. I put up with the shitty feelings knowing that at some point I would feel different. I wasnt sure what that different would be but I knew it wouldnt be the total mess that I was inside.
Give it a go, everyone is here to support you through the rough times of learning to live again :l