Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

[JackieClaire]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Checking Stirls post.............yes I've been mentioned :goodjob:

Pinguuuuuuuuuu I got as high as a kite before my first year AF anni. It's a very emotionally charged time.

[stirly-girly]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Zenstyle;1279637 wrote: I?m still on yesterday?s thread? haven?t had a chance to catch up till now?

Stirly? Re your post from yesterday, both those ?bastards? left this planet some time ago and I should imagine they got their just desserts on the other side. The first one, when I was seven, was an ongoing thing as he used to babysit me? he wasn?t right in the head but everyone in the village knew him and thought he was an OK guy, just not all there. People weren?t aware of things like children being interfered with in those days? and that island is 50 years behind the times on top of it. With my step father it only happened once but worse. I think the daily grind with him was actually worse than that experience? He was a very nasty man? he?d drag me off a chair by my hair instead of asking me to get up, generally rough me up without hitting me? stuff like that. Him and my mum used to get blind drunk. They disappeared in Glasgow for 4 days once when I was 9, leaving me with a friend of hers we went to for our ?holidays? every summer. They went out for a drink and never came back (at last it wasn?t a pint of milk or a loaf of bread? that would have been REALLY rough? joke, haha). After a day her friend called all the cop shops and hospitals looking for them. They swanned in, drunk, 4 days later, announcing they were getting married? and so they did, before we went home to the island. (The flying pencil to our island only has two seats per side? and instead of letting me sit with my mum the asshole made me take the single seat at the back of the plane. Funny the things we remember!) So, apart from the abuse, there was a lot more going on with him? he was a bad stick. He stopped harassing me when I got older? actually, to be precise, he stopped messing with me after I kicked him in the balls. One of my proudest moments? evah!

My biggest issue with all of the above was not with the ?bastards? though? it was the fact that my mother didn?t protect me? and that?s what came out in therapy. I was so fucking angry at her I was spitting tacks each and every day of life until my late 30's. Anyway, after therapy, and after I held her feet to the fire until she took responsibility for her actions (and there is a hell of a lot more than the above? it would take me all day to tell it all? lol) we started to build a proper mother/daughter relationship. I can honestly say I hated the woman up until then. Sounds weird to my ears now, as I talk to her on the phone almost every day and she is one of the people I confide everything in. She knows about my drinking etc. and all the other details of my life. Incidentally, she quit drinking at 67 years old. Never too late, eh? And stopped smoking about 10 years ago.

RC? Your post yesterday hit the nail on the head? we pick the wrong men because we think that?s what we deserve. And for me it?s compounded by the fact that I have such enormous trust issues with men (not as friends, only in relationships? I get on great with my male friends as I?m a bit of a tomboy). So? especially at the start of a new relationship? I?m usually left scratching my noggin as to whether there is something to be concerned about or whether it?s my mind playing tricks on me. Very confusing! I don?t crave the drama however (thank Gawd)? I actually crave stability. (And Stirls? the above will answer the point you made a week or so ago about me going back to old boyfriends? lol? I wanted to tell you at the time but didn?t feel like getting into it? a ?new? man is a real upheaval for me? and I don?t need anything to help me in the direction of the bottle right now? I?m not on an even enough keel as far a that?s concerned.)

It really helped ?talking? about things yesterday and it may very well have saved Glen from getting canned as that was where I was heading. We had a long talk last night. Neither of us are perfect (I don?t think he realizes just HOW imperfect I am!) but the fact that he talked things through helped. He didn?t used to be like that. So? things are back on track there? at least for now! *insert goofy grin*

OK, that?s enough of my shite for today? please resume normal transmission while I read today?s thread!!!
First I have to say that I figured that a lot of your anger towards your mother had to do with the fact that she didn't protect you. She maybe even knew about it but was so insecure and dependent on her then BF, and later husband, that she chose him over you. I'm sad to say that lots of women do that. They were abused, either physically or mentally or both and are so dependent on their partners that they will allow their children to be abused as well, rather than end the relationship. Again, I am so sorry that you had such horrid experiences as a child. No wonder you were angry. Who wouldn't be carrying all of that shite around with them. It is to your credit that you were able to forgive her. I don't know if I would have been able to but I guess you have to to move on. I've never been in therapy. The idea kind of scares me. I did go to a psychiatrist once to talk about my drinking problem but I stopped after a couple of sessions. We just didn't "click".

As for you going back to old BF's I can understand it in the sense that it is often easier to fall back on the familiar, albeit not perfect, than put the effort into getting to know someone new especially if you're not ready for it and it stresses you out. I'm glad that you talked things out. Maybe you need to have some heart-to-heart talks and get things out in the open. Then you can both decide if you want to make the effort to continue or if things would be too complicated or stressful. You, especially, need to feel that this is something that you can manage now and not something that would send you into a spin. I now that you will do what is best for you and you'll do what you need to to protect your sobriety.:huggy

[Coco-Nut]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Hello - anyone home? Just a quick check in and want to get everyone's opinion of my nice new avatar. Hello?

[Panno]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Coco ........LMAO ..well what can I say other than...hello :H:H:H

[Recluse]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Hiya stirly,

thanks for that long reply. I must admit that I have in the past wondered how you came to be a heavy drinker. We are all diffferent. We know that when it comes to getting off the drink, what works for one person may not work for another. I suspect that the same applies with regard to becoming alcoholics, i.e people become alcoholics for different reasons.

In my own case, there is absolutely no history of alcohol abuse (or drug abuse) whatsoever in my family. My parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, and cousins hardly drink at all. So, in the main, I attribute my drinking to a bad childhood and an unhappy past, though not to any specific events in the past. Having said that, I do have a tendency to do things to extremes, so maybe I was just taking my drinking to extremes. Is that the same thing as having an addictive personality? I don't know. It does seem likely that genes played some part in your alcoholism. Perhaps the ready availability of cheap drink did too. I'm sure the latter played a part in my alcoholism. After all, it would be difficult to develop an AL dependency if AL was not affordable and readily available. Personally, I think that raising prices over a period of time will turn out to be the most effective way of reducing the health costs of alcohol.

Whatever the causes of your alcoholism, I'm glad that you seem to be in control of your drinking now :l.

[InChains]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

howdy guys, no al in the house, sober tonight, already very very nervous about it, I made a fundamental realisation (in the shower, may i add, whcih si where i always realise improtant things) that i have been allowing myself to continue drinking with the fact I want to quit as an excuse not to actually do it. so now I'm doing it. hope people are about tonight to keep me distracted...

[stirly-girly]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

pingu1997;1279720 wrote: Feeling really grizzly tonight. Not sure why. Tomorrow I have an awesome day planned and Thursday is my big af day. No idea why I feel so damn blah tonight. Tigger is driving me nuts. I have just told her to get out of my sight before I lose it. Just wanna scream right now
Aaaarrrrrhgggghhhhhhh

Why don't you go look stuff up on-line. Like some new shiny things, some of your favourite songs on Youtube, go visit a place you'd like to go to with Google Street view. Anything to occupy your mind. What about a warm bath with some candles or make yourself some comfort food. A good book, a DVD? Anything to help you feel better and get your mind either calmer or thinking about other things.

BTW - there are some new pics on the Piglet tour and I posted earlier that there is one in particular that I'm sure you will like.

[JackieClaire]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Just in case I'm not here later on Incheroooo. I'll leave you some crayons and stuff so you don't draw on the barrack walls again.

[Panno]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Ok I'm off to get ready for Masterchef, the final tonight

Inchy stick around someone will be here soon, keep up the good fight, love your positive attitude tonight

[JackieClaire]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Ooooooh new series of CSI tonight with Ted Dansen :h

[pingu1997]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

JackieClaire;1279721 wrote: Checking Stirls post.............yes I've been mentioned :goodjob:

Pinguuuuuuuuuu I got as high as a kite before my first year AF anni. It's a very emotionally charged time.

Yeah I been high. Now I feel the opposite. It's right pissing me orf. Sorry, I know everyone's got shit going on, but I want to cry but sodding Meds won't let me

Tomorrow will be so cool

[InChains]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

hugs for pingu and thanks to jc for my crayons, i am actually drawing this evening, portraits, love drawing people

just opened a nice bottle of...

fizzy grape juice :P

[JackieClaire]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

pingu1997;1279731 wrote: Yeah I been high. Now I feel the opposite. It's right pissing me orf. Sorry, I know everyone's got shit going on, but I want to cry but sodding Meds won't let me
Tomorrow will be so cool
Just you wait and see when you're charging into year 2 AF. I found year 1 full of milestones to get out of the way. Birthdays, Christmas, parties etc. You'll be an old hand.

Have a :l anyway.

InChains;1279733 wrote: hugs for pingu and thanks to jc for my crayons, i am actually drawing this evening, portraits, love drawing people
just opened a nice bottle of...
fizzy grape juice :P

That loud thumping noise you can here in the distance is me doing a happy dance.

[pingu1997]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Thanks. Plenty on the box to keep me going tonight. Then tomorrow I get stabbed and scratched all in the name of a treat. And there's a mountain of ironing to get done
Tigger has finally come out of her good period and is back to irritating, hitting and mouthing off at me and her brother. Hmmmmm, doesn't help my mood one tiny bit

[stirly-girly]

Army Thread Tuesday 13th March

Recluse;1279725 wrote: Hiya stirly,

thanks for that long reply. I must admit that I have in the past wondered how you came to be a heavy drinker. We are all different. We know that when it comes to getting off the drink, what works for one person may not work for another. I suspect that the same applies with regard to becoming alcoholics, i.e people become alcoholics for different reasons.

In my own case, there is absolutely no history of alcohol abuse (or drug abuse) whatsoever in my family. My parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts, and cousins hardly drink at all. So, in the main, I attribute my drinking to a bad childhood and an unhappy past, though not to any specific events in the past. Having said that, I do have a tendency to do things to extremes, so maybe I was just taking my drinking to extremes. Is that the same thing as having an addictive personality? I don't know. It does seem likely that genes played some part in your alcoholism. Perhaps the ready availability of cheap drink did too. I'm sure the latter played a part in my alcoholism. After all, it would be difficult to develop an AL dependency if AL was not affordable and readily available. Personally, I think that raising prices over a period of time will turn out to be the most effective way of reducing the health costs of alcohol.

Whatever the causes of your alcoholism, I'm glad that you seem to be in control of your drinking now :l.Thanks, Reccie.

I don't know about the prices of AL there but here it is substantially cheaper than it is in Canada, for example. A bottle of Johnny Walker Red for instance, is around 17 euro if I'm not mistaken. Same for the regular brands of gin, vodka and rum. Wine varies in price from 2 euro for a litre of cheap box wine to very expensive specialty wines. The prices used to be cheaper but they raised the sales tax a year or so ago. And it's available literally everywhere from liquor shops to large supermarkets to bakeries. Even the kiosks that sell cigarettes, newspapers, gum, etc., have small bottles of ouzo and cold beer in their refrigerators. I really don't know if raising the price would work or not. For alcoholics, anyway. It's like cigarette smokers -they've raised the prices of cigarettes several times over the past few years and I don't think too many people have stopped smoking because of that.

InChains;1279726 wrote: howdy guys, no al in the house, sober tonight, already very very nervous about it, I made a fundamental realisation (in the shower, may i add, whcih si where i always realise improtant things) that i have been allowing myself to continue drinking with the fact I want to quit as an excuse not to actually do it. so now I'm doing it. hope people are about tonight to keep me distracted...I won't be around, Inchy but the UK folk will be, for a while at least. Maybe you could go visit the Undies later on. They're a great bunch and funny as heck. Best of luck on getting through the night.:l
Panno;1279729 wrote: Ok I'm off to get ready for Masterchef, the final tonight

Inchy stick around someone will be here soon, keep up the good fight, love your positive attitude tonight

Laters, Panno.
pingu1997;1279731 wrote: Yeah I been high. Now I feel the opposite. It's right pissing me orf. Sorry, I know everyone's got shit going on, but I want to cry but sodding Meds won't let me

Tomorrow will be so cool

Tomorrow will be better, you'll see. And Thursday will be smashing.

Troopers, once again I'm off to walk Freddo and then to bed.

Wishing all of you...



Tomorrowz.....