Found My Old Friend, But....

[AAthlete]

So, I was cleaning up the basement in preparation for our Superbowl party, and while vacuuming under the couch cushions found a 1/2 pint of vodka.

I had a quick laugh and poured it into the sink right away, but a little later felt very strange. Some of the old feelings returned and although I felt good about dumping it out, I also felt for a moment that I was back drinking again. It was also weird because I had a dream last night about waking up in the middle of the night (like when I was drinking), and searching for the 1/2 pint that I still had hidden.

Not sure the reason for this post, other than is scared me to find that bottle of vodka. For the past 3 1/2 weeks I've been AF and felt sooo in control, and in that moment I realized how truly weak I still can be. Guess it was a situation/trigger that I hadn't prepared myself for and for some reason right now I truly feel sad....

I know that I'm still on track, just needed to put down my feelings in writing. Thanks for listening....

[Preciouspinot]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Good for you...recognize the strength in your actions...you have stepped up to another level..it might be scarey...I myself am afraid of heights...this is a good thing

[Popeye]

Found My Old Friend, But....

I know what you mean. I have a small panic attack when these situations arise. I have to gather myself and remember to do the right thing. Glad you dumped it.

[weemelonhead]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Good on you AAthlete, your first reactions were spot on!!! completely understand those freaky feelings though,......I woke up the other morning after about 2 hours of sleep feeling like I had a hangover for the first few seconds......I had to consciously remind myself that it was lack of sleep, but it brought all the old morning after feelings back without an actual morning after!!! VERY strange, but also a good, if short reminder as to why I stopped that bag in the first place.

Just goes to show...complacency is always a no no...

You're still in the land of the sober my friend......Good news!!
Weemelon xxx

[Rags]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Hi Athlete,
Congratulations for dumping the vodka, and big congratulations for your AF time!
Rags

[irishlady]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Well done AA and congratulations...Its amazing how we manage to turn our brains around and see things differently, betcha 4 weeks ago you would have jumped on that bottle of vodka with glee and if anyone had told you to dump it down the sink you would have thought they were mad...

[Diana]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Hang in there mate, you have shown incredible courage in your action. Sounds like a winner to me.

Regards
Diana

[satori]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Well done AAthlete,

I'm not sure how I would have coped.

If it happened in the morning - probably would have done the same as you.
But if I had found it in the evening ........Hmmm? Might have been a different story!


Well done - that took real strength

Satori

[sammys]

Found My Old Friend, But....

AA first off sorry about da bears. Second I thought of you when I went to my party, I did not drink and had a really good time. Good job on the cleaning of the house and the booze out of your life.


Sammys

[YoungAtHeart]

Found My Old Friend, But....

That's a neat story AAthlete, although a bit painful and freaky. I think it was one of the bumps on your road, but you sailed over it beautifully. I don't think we escape them when we're really committed to being sober. Perhaps it was a gift in disguise to prepare you for a time when you really are more vulnerable.

Sorry about the Bears.

All the best to you. You are fighting a good fight!

Hugs,
Kathy

[Rocky]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Good job Athlete!!!

However...get this...Due to a funeral in the family besides the in-laws living with us we have Sister-in-law, her daughter and daughters husband staying with us since last Wed.

I'm out getting food on Sat. and my wife calls and says...Can you pick up some VODKA, Whiskey and wine for all the guests!!!! So I did...

As the weekend progressed I must have been asked 20 times if they could fix me a drink... God have MERCY...
Some how...I managed to stick to water. and come to MOW today starting on day 9... Truly a miracle..
But much thanks goes to this MOW group...you all are an inspiration..Thanks

[YoungAtHeart]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Well done, Rocky!!! I've lost my capacity to use smilies, so consider yourself to have clapping, pom-poms and many smilies to cheer you on your accomplishment! Good job!

XOXOX,
Kathy

[AAthlete]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Great job, Rocky!

What you did sounds even more difficult than mine was. Out by yourself, at the liquor store - and on top of that having people want to fix you drinks when you got back.....

Truly inspirational, and congrats on your AF days so far. I was thinking of both you and Sammys this weekend, hoping that everything went okay, and sounds like both of you came through with flying colors.

BTW - was listening to some music over the weekend and Cash's 'Redemption' came on - seems somewhat fitting for what we are all going through.

[Roxy1234]

Found My Old Friend, But....

AAthelete,
This is a great post! (and so is your AF time, btw!! Yay!). I have just figured out that complacency after a few days of af time under my belt is my biggest enemy. So I am starting this thing again, following the supps, exercise and hypno to the LETTER and not stopping any of it once I start feeling good.

Thanks for the post and the reminder about the complacency trap :-)

Roxy

[Rocky]

Found My Old Friend, But....

Thanks AA...

A lot of my strength came from interfacing with you and all those at MWO..

Yea, that song is powerful! Love it.