I caved....

[AAthlete]

I sit here crying -- sad that I disappointed myself and my friends at MWO.

I gave in last night - not because I felt stressed, anxious or anything else - just thought it would be nice to get a buzz on.

Feel better today and am back on track - just needed to share..

[InnerStrength]

I caved....

Oh, AA Athlete. It happens. You came back and you were honest. The important thing is that you recognize why it happened. So let's not waste this. Let's use this as a tool in your "tool box" that we use against this affliction. Take this experience and pack it away and use it next time you might feel weak or tempted etc. Remember how you feel today - disappointed with yourself etc. Likely, it will make you steer clear next time. Probably, it will help you remember that it's not worth it. No experience in life is a wasted experience and this does not have to be either. In fact, what you might want to do is write down in detail how you feel today - and keep it for future reference for future temptations. That is what I plan to do for if I slip in future. Then we have a reference point. It is too easy to "forget" how remorseful and disappointed we are down the road. Just a thought.

Now, you fabulous MWOer you! Lift your chin and time to jump right back on that bike! There is much more fun and living to be had! We still love, respect and adore you!
Love Jen

[lushy]

I caved....

AA now stop it!!! One night does not erase how inspirational you have been to me and others around here. One night? Big whoop. You will get back on path. Does not change how inspiring you are to me. If I need to come over and slap some sense into you I will.................

[Dancer]

I caved....

Hi AAthlete,
I'm new here but I can relate to that feeling of THE BUZZ. Do you know why you wanted to feel it? Perhaps if you could backtrack in your mind you may be able to pinpoint it and then be more ready the next time to just let the feeling run through and away without drinking. You may feel, if you don't deal with it now, the next time you get to that point it will be that much easier to give in to it. But don't beat yourself up about it, hey you're still here aren't you?

Dancer.

[Waves 2]

I caved....

Luscious, you are getting too fond of slapping these men folk. Have you been re-training as a massage therapist?

AA Get back on your bike. No worries..

[lushy]

I caved....

I do sound like a man beater don't I? Okay, I take it back AA. No slapping........

[Preciouspinot]

I caved....

We have all been there Athlete and completely understand your frustration. Remember that this slip does not define your journey. Learn from it and move on. It's not an easy road, I know but, we are all here for one another to lean on. Feel better and try not to beat yourself up...

[Wynot]

I caved....

AAthlete,

Seems someone recently put things in perspective for me with some statistics. If my math is correct that would give you 96.2% AF days out of the last - is it 27. Sounds like an AA+ to me.....

[gabby]

I caved....

AA, I havent talked to you yet here. But I feel like now is a good time.

Here is me...eight months plus into my sobriety. I can honestly say I have not caved physically. But in my heart....I have many times. I can truly say I have longed for that buzz as well. Even lately. Funny thing cuz I even beat myself for just thinkin it. I think to me....I shouldnt even be thinkin about it. What the heck is up with this?

But my answer is....I think is that it is never gonna go away. And it is just something we have to live with.

So wheather we actually do it....or dream it....or just think about it....or long for it......the fact is we have to live with it.

Waves, Lushy, and Jenneh and all the rest of us here is right.....just get back on your bike and get at it again. Embrace your bad feelings so you learn, but move on. It will get easier. My wishes and longing for the buzz are MUCH fewer and futher in-between...so that I am thankful for.

Just like a death of a loved one. Hurts like hell at first....slowly.....and I mean slowly it gets easier, but the pain never goes away.

Ya just learn to live with it. Unfortunately the drink is one of our loved ones that we need to learn to live without....yet live with the pain of missin it.

[Newyear]

I caved....

Hey AA....!
So you had a one night stand.....gave into it....it happens. All you can do is try to learn 'why' so you can use that info the next time you want to give in ( cause there will be more times you will want to- like Gabby said).

AA - you have tons of determination (I can tell from your avitar )...no, really I have read your posts and I know you want this and you will do this for yourself. Just have to get back in there and not worry too much over it.

Lisa

[DidItForMe]

I caved....

AA:

You went for a long time AF and that is what you should be focusing on. That is a real success story. Don't dwell on the negative. Trust me, we ALL have that habit. Focus on the good stuff and know that we are all proud of what you have accomplished!

[SKendall]

I caved....

Hi AA,

You have been doing tremendously well. You have enormous insight and I have learned from you. Never mind about the slip, this journey isn't about perfection. I look forward to reading your posts!!

Hilary:h

[Beaches]

I caved....

AA don't beat yourself up. We all do it. Just stand up tall, brush yourself off and get back on track.
You are a wonderful addition to this group and have provided so much support. We are only human, every experience we learn from. You are just fine.

[Rocky]

I caved....

AA my friend...Human is the word...

If you /we / could do everything we set out to do or should do...well, we would most likely not be living here on earth...

You are an inspiration to me and many others...you know the routine...get on yourself (which I'm sure you already have) (Like a coach would) and jump back into the fight! We are all here to support, and Cheer... (ask Jenneh the cheerleader) and encourage...we all get down and (Wynot...that's great...96.2%) success...

Keep on Keeping on my friend...Very proud of your accomplishments.

Best Regards and blessings,

[sammys]

I caved....

Hi AA, I am still proud of you and everything you contribute is very good for all of us. I have been there bought the T-Shirt as they say and you know we are still doing soooooooooo much better than before MWO.

XXXOOO
Sammys