In so many ways.
I was out on the golf courses with my brother, (ex drinking partner), yesterday. I don't hangout with him as much as I used to when I was drinking, and I seldom talk about the evils of alcohol around him....because he drinks alot, he thinks he likes it, and he doesn't see it as a problem. Anyways the topic of finances came up first, and I told him that I am doing well, and one of the major reasons was because I don't spend as much money now that I don't drink. His reply was that he doesn't shop when he drinks. I told him that I don't shop either but I am saving somewhere between $500 and $700 per month not spending money on beer and booze. He looked at me kind of dumbfounded and said man I have never spent that type of money monthly on booze. I sat back and chuckled because I know what he drinks, and how much he drinks, and how often he goes out and he easily spends that amount...he just doesn't want to see it.
As we were talking more I told him how my health has improved and how I don't have stress anymore now that I quit drinking, and he said that he has lots of stress because of his occupation, that's why he needs to have drinks a couple of times a week. He doesn't realize that, (and although most drinkers would never believe this), drinking causes these feeling of stress, and the feeling that you need a drink to solve it is a major part of the problem.
He said drinking doesn't really affect him because he drinks in moderation.....this was after he had finished a 12 pack, and then we went back to the club house where he ordered 2 margeritas before 4 PM. This is his idea of moderation, not falling down slurring drunk.
The reason why I wanted to bring this up is because he honestly thinks, like I once did, that this is normal drinking and it doesn't affect his life, his health or his wallet. Now although I did take my drinking to the next level and far surpassed him when I was drinking daily, he normally drank with me drink for drink every weekend. He isn't in a doward spiral, and he handles his drinking fine, but nothing I could say to him would ever make him change his perception of how much he drinks and what alcohol is really costing him as far as his wallet or his mental health.
I am so glad I figured it out and that I am sober today!
I was out on the golf courses with my brother, (ex drinking partner), yesterday. I don't hangout with him as much as I used to when I was drinking, and I seldom talk about the evils of alcohol around him....because he drinks alot, he thinks he likes it, and he doesn't see it as a problem. Anyways the topic of finances came up first, and I told him that I am doing well, and one of the major reasons was because I don't spend as much money now that I don't drink. His reply was that he doesn't shop when he drinks. I told him that I don't shop either but I am saving somewhere between $500 and $700 per month not spending money on beer and booze. He looked at me kind of dumbfounded and said man I have never spent that type of money monthly on booze. I sat back and chuckled because I know what he drinks, and how much he drinks, and how often he goes out and he easily spends that amount...he just doesn't want to see it.
As we were talking more I told him how my health has improved and how I don't have stress anymore now that I quit drinking, and he said that he has lots of stress because of his occupation, that's why he needs to have drinks a couple of times a week. He doesn't realize that, (and although most drinkers would never believe this), drinking causes these feeling of stress, and the feeling that you need a drink to solve it is a major part of the problem.
He said drinking doesn't really affect him because he drinks in moderation.....this was after he had finished a 12 pack, and then we went back to the club house where he ordered 2 margeritas before 4 PM. This is his idea of moderation, not falling down slurring drunk.
The reason why I wanted to bring this up is because he honestly thinks, like I once did, that this is normal drinking and it doesn't affect his life, his health or his wallet. Now although I did take my drinking to the next level and far surpassed him when I was drinking daily, he normally drank with me drink for drink every weekend. He isn't in a doward spiral, and he handles his drinking fine, but nothing I could say to him would ever make him change his perception of how much he drinks and what alcohol is really costing him as far as his wallet or his mental health.
I am so glad I figured it out and that I am sober today!
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