Tee-totalers are boring losers!

[FlyAway]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

I assumed you meant beer! :H

[Unwasted]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Library Girl,

I felt like what you've described here for longer than I can remember. Finally, though, after almost seven months of sobriety, I've crossed over to the other side.

I can be around other people drinking and not feel odd, forget about the fact that I'm not drinking, and have a good time. You just haven't had enough sober time to experience this, but you will if you'll just stick it out.

And, as others have said here, you're not giving enough recognition to the phenomenon of "eurphoric recall" because much of what we remember as having been fun was fraught with a lot of negatives and we're only remembering the positives.

I can tell from your posts that you're an interesting, intelligent woman. Once you have longer term sobriety, you'll flourish as the real you again and hardly give alcohol a thought.

xx,
UN

[LibraryGirl]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Hi Unwasted. What a kind, thoughtful reply. I recognize what you are saying as absolutely true. It is something that takes time, regardless of how we know "intellectually" that we are not remembering the whole picture of AL accurately. I look forward to being 6,7 months sober and beyond! Thanks again, you're a star!

[mama bear]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

LG
I hold onto the fact that I went to a Van Halen concert sober. I was surrounded by tipsy, drunk people and I had more fun than any of them and I actually remember the concert.

It helps that I am lunatic when sober..... :-)

[resrchqueen]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Mama... what did you think of Van Halen...we just saw them and I kind of feel like David Lee Roth has lost his pipes. lol

[Byrdlady]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

LG, I have read with interest the replies to your query. How can we possibly be the same fun loving, life-of-the-partiers that we once were? How do you get the joy back? The answer I have is so simple, but one of the most difficult to achieve: It takes time. I am a year and 4 months sober, and I am JUST NOW getting to where I don't yearn for AL...in any way! This took a long time to come to me. I don't let go easily. But I can tell you with sincerity, that you will find yourself again...and be just as funny and/or obnoxious as you ever were drinking! When I was 6 months sober, I thought I had achieved this...and then again at 9 months...so maybe what I'm learning is that this is a story that continues to unfold right before me, but it is getting better all the time. My sense of who I am and my place in the world is coming into focus. I am sharper than I have ever been in my adult life. AL has no place in my future plans, it has brought nothing but PAIN and misery. I am now happy to be in this place now, but I think it only comes with time. B

[Supercrew]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Great post Byrdy! I agree completely!

[KateH1]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Well, put, Byrdy! I also agree that getting comfortable within ourselves and sobriety does take time....way more than a few weeks or months! I too noticed a big difference into my second year of sobriety, but quite honestly, I was a full 2 years sober before I can truthfully say that I was really getting in to my True Comfort zone and the journey continues!

[mama bear]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Van Halen rocked...but not like they did in the 80's!!

[Nichau]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Love this thread! Thanks to all for sharing your views on the struggle that I deal with, too.

[LibraryGirl]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

mama bear;1329171 wrote: Van Halen rocked...but not like they did in the 80's!!

MB I saw Van Halen in Charlotte when I was 16 yo. They rocked!!!:band2: I wasn't drinking (that I can remember, lol), but I do remember a fat joint being passed around the whole stand I was seated in! Times have changed, lol.

[LillyE]

Tee-totalers are boring losers!

Thank you Byrdie, Supercrew and Unwasted for your terrific and thought-provoking, encouraging responses. You three are among those here whose posts always really stand out to me and make me think. I really hope to one day be here with similar time, and therefore insight, under my belt to offer others.

Library Girl - the Vale book is helping me reassess this one. I can't remember - did you say you'd read it already? I think it is absolutely true that time is probably a HUGE factor in conquering this and therefore we just have to take that leap of faith that it will come in time and not get too deep in the pity party when we feel 'boring'. I'm also really trying to focus on the positive things about drinking whilst also recalling (often painfully) the things that were so very UNfun about it. (E.g. replacing 'alcohol good with alcohol bad')

I also wrote a 'gratitude list' today. I've been feeling mired in the 'problems' in my life of late, which really aren't so terrible on balance, so it helps me to take time to consciously recall all that I do have.