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Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

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    #1

    Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

    I am just curious. I have seen members say time and again: "It doesn't work. I tried it. You will fail."

    I'm not going trying to debate whether this is true or not. What I want to know is if hearing someone "with experience" tell you that, was enough. Or did you have to try it for yourself to believe it. It's kind of like the don't do as I did, but as I say. Ideally, we would all be better off if we could only follow other's advice and base our faith on it, but is it enough?


    "I like people too much or not at all."     Sylvia Plath
    Tags: None
    #2
    Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

    Im gonna just for once.....let someone else make a mistake......and learn from THEIR mistake...cuz Lawd knows, I think Ive met my quota.

    Its actually very good for me, to read those kind of posts, for those crazy times that I think I "can" in fact moderate AL. There are some that can, but they are far stronger than I.

    To be honest, thats the reason I never ever, did any type of drugs. Im fairly certain if I had, Id not be typing right now, or at least with very limited brain function(insert jokes here)
    Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




    DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

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      #3
      Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

      So Nelz you quit AL and you never tried to moderate? Is that what you are saying?


      P.S. I know those of you who have been here for years or more are sick of these types of threads asking about moderation. However, it's a natural question for someone new to quitting AL, in my opinion. It's not any more redundant than any other AL question, and there are many who will benefit from this discussion.


      "I like people too much or not at all."       Sylvia Plath

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        #4
        Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

        I like the way you worded this question, it will be interesting to hear if someone says Yes.

        I was pretty successful with drinking moderately for the past three years, but I believe all people wanting to drink moderately end up going over their limits with varying frequency. I am done with that struggle. It is too much work to control alcohol consistently once it has been out of control. It is easier to remain AF. That is what I plan to do. I would rather focus my effort on about anything else.
        My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

        Comment

          #5
          Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

          To be honest, Sunbeam, I can't think of anyone who drinks "normally" that I have ever drank with who hasn't gone "over the limit" ever. They don't consider they have a problem with AL. If you ever get drunk on AL, then you have a problem, right? If so, then nearly all drinkers have a problem. I would venture to guess than less than 10% of drinkers have never gotten drunk, and that is a high estimate. Thoughts?


          "I like people too much or not at all."           Sylvia Plath

          Comment

            #6
            Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

            LibraryGirl;1342072 wrote: So Nelz you quit AL and you never tried to moderate? Is that what you are saying?


            P.S. I know those of you who have been here for years or more are sick of these types of threads asking about moderation. However, it's a natural question for someone new to quitting AL, in my opinion. It's not any more redundant than any other AL question, and there are many who will benefit from this discussion.
            Yes, that is correct. I know myself well enough to know that is best to keep AL completely out of my system. I fear that once it gets a grip on me again, it will again win the battle.

            Its like the cookies I eat now. Reeeedaymdickyoulous as it sounds, Ive tried to mod those cotton pickin things. But I cant.....I have them for my nite nite snack, have two or three for breakfast with coffee, when I come home I have a few, sound familiar?

            Ive just gone too long without it, and dont want to ever open those flood gates again, cuz I dont know if I can win the battle again, or if I even want to try.
            Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




            DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

            Comment

              #7
              Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

              LG, I think it is about being compelled to drink. If a person drinks occasionally, and once in awhile drinks too much, some might consider that normal. One could debate whats normal for a very long time. There are published health standards, they are a better reference point. For women, that would be one 5 oz. glass of wine per day.
              My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

              Comment

                #8
                Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                attempts

                My impression has been that the people who say that have tried it themselves many times and failed. I seem to remember from a long time ago Determinator saying it was like chasing a hat that was blowing in the wind down the street.

                That doesn't mean you or anyone else shouldn't try it. If you get a dogmatic response that you can't then it might make moderation all that more appealing, that's only human. It's important to remember that there are many different levels of drinking problems and for sure the damage for some is a lot worse and that attempts could serious life problems, like car accidents and hospitalizations. There are others who have less severe problems and are quite functional. We don't know what the range is on this website. There don't seem to be many who successfully moderate here but that could be because the site is attracting people on the more severe end. Also people who want to moderate in the past have been shouted down. It's very hard for people trying to abstain to even contemplate the idea. It's tempting the addictive voice to even read it.

                Personally, I think harm reduction is a more helpful term and realistic goal.

                Yes it's true that people without serious problems get drunk. The difference for me, and this is a female point of view, is that they weren't dependent on it emotionally and psychologically. People who don't have problems and occasionally get drunk are not the ones who use booze to self-medicate. I'll acknowledge this is just my opinion, based on my own experience. And while people without problems get drunk, I think that's mainly in youth. You don't see it too much as you get older. If you do see drunk older people, there often is a problem though as I said above, there is a big scale of degree and functionality. This is all my opinion.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                  Hi LG,

                  I tried many, many times to control my drinking prior to finding MWO back in March 2009. I was never successful and felt like a complete failure with each and every attempt. The truth for me is that I have a problem with alcohol--all alcohol--not just beer, not just wine, not just spirits. In reading Seven Weeks to Sobriety, and taking the test included therein to identify my alcohol biotype, I landed in the allergic/addicted category which really came as no surprise to me. One of the characteristics of this biotype is:
                  You often can't predict or control how much you will drink at one time because alcohol quickly alters your brain's ability to make choices.

                  This is the primary reason why all my past attempts to control my drinking were a complete failure and any future attempts would be as well. I was actually relieved to learn this about myself and finally able to put to rest any fantasy I had of attempting to control my drinking again at some point in the future. Try as I might I will never be able to control the uncontrollable. Knowing and accepting this fact allowed me to be able to move forward and focus 100% on abstinence.

                  I personally know many people who fall into the Nonalcoholic Chemistry Biotypes                   described in the book and their drinking was never like mine, not even close. Here's some of what the book says about them:

                  1. Normal Drinker: Typically 2-4 drinks are enough for you. Your ability to "keep up with the boys" when drinking at parties is poor. You would consider it punishment to have to drink 12 beers or a pint of vodka daily and simply couldn't do it, no matter what your personality or character. You are blessed with the chemistry of a nonalcoholic drinker.

                  2. Alcohol-Intolerant: Alcohol offers you no rewarding highs; it only upsets you physically. You learned quickly that you are alcohol intolerant and you avoid drinking.

                  3. Nonalcoholic Hypoglycemic (May Mistakenly be Labeled Alcoholic): A few drinks makes you spacey. You never could handle much alcohol. You don't need much to raise blood sugar levels; a drink or two gives you the temporary lift you seek.

                  There is a thread under the Research Section with the test, I think. I will bump it up in case you or others are interested.

                  Sheri
                  AF since 3/16/09
                  NF since 3/20/07

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                    Nelz;1342070 wrote: Im gonna just for once.....let someone else make a mistake......and learn from THEIR mistake...cuz Lawd knows, I think Ive met my quota.

                    Its actually very good for me, to read those kind of posts, for those crazy times that I think I "can" in fact moderate AL. There are some that can, but they are far stronger than I.

                    To be honest, thats the reason I never ever, did any type of drugs. Im fairly certain if I had, Id not be typing right now, or at least with very limited brain function(insert jokes here)
                    Oh Nelz:

                    I'd be typing six feet under the ground. People loved to sit next to me at parties because when it came to my turn to do coke, joint, mushrooms I'd pass...

                    On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
                    *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
                    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
                    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                      Me. although the idea has crossed my.mind once or twice.
                      I have a drink problem, I have been AF since 15 March 2011 and I am working hard to stay that way

                      They don't call me Pingu Purple Pants for nothing....

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                        I tried it once after a long abstinence, nothing bad happened but I could feel my consumption going up little by little and alcohol STILL had a hold on me...I went back to AF pretty damn quick and back to freedom.

                        NOT everyone who gets drunk is an alcoholic, of course they are not, I have friends who will get drunk or tipsy a few times a year and would drink normally the rest of the year, the difference is...if they were told, for whatever reason, that that could not drink, they would be more miffed than absolutely devastated like an alcoholic would be. And they could do it without question, an alcoholic will struggle, wish they could drink,lament they cannot drink or actually go and drink....so there is the difference, although some drinkers will go out and get pissed once in a while, alcohol does NOT control their lives and they do not think about it all the time, nor do they drink every day.

                        If you cannot give up drinking or desperately have to cling on to moderation because you cannot remove alcohol from your life...yep, you have a problem.
                        "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

                        AF 10th May 2010
                        NF 12th May 2010

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                          I agree with that assessment oney. I absolutely can give up alcohol. I know that now. I do think I will probably have another drink occasionally.


                          "I like people too much or not at all."                           Sylvia Plath

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                            LibraryGirl;1342279 wrote: I agree with that assessment oney. I absolutely can give up alcohol. I know that now. I do think I will probably have another drink occasionally.
                            Just wondering...why??
                            "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

                            AF 10th May 2010
                            NF 12th May 2010

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Who here has quit AL and Never Tried to Moderate?

                              I've made the difficult decision to abstain completely rather than try to have the odd drink now and again, my reasons being that I would rather do without than torture myself trying to control it, and i don't want to end up in a mess again. But that's just me. The risks outweigh the benefits. For me anyway
                              I have a drink problem, I have been AF since 15 March 2011 and I am working hard to stay that way

                              They don't call me Pingu Purple Pants for nothing....

                              Comment

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