I think I am a Normie
Hi LG,
I think we have all thought the same thing about ourselves at one point or another along the way. The difference for me is that I did all my contemplation and trying to control my drinking way before I began posting here.
I can remember taking the same tests that Kaslo mentioned and "cheating" as well, always putting more emphasis on the characteristics that pointed more toward me being the "normie" than the "alcoholic." Inevitably, I would convince myself that I had just developed a bad habit and vow once again to try to control my drinking while completely dismissing the HUGE red flag that normies don't search out tests to take to determine if they have a problem with alcohol. In retrospect, I can see so clearly now that I chose to see only what I wanted to see because I wasn?t yet ready or willing to commit to an AF life.
However, by the time I landed here, I was no longer in denial and knew that no matter what I was by definition (problem drinker or alcoholic) or what I had (disease or allergy or just a bad habit), alcohol was ruining my life and turning me into someone I didn't want to be, and had been progressively doing so for over 30 years. I really didn't have any interest in moderating because I had tried and failed so many times and knew that holding on to the idea that I might one day be able to drink again was going to prevent me from achieving what I knew I had to do to survive the rest of my life. I just wanted to be done with AL once and for all.
I have lots of people in my life that can take or leave alcohol and when they do drink, it?s generally only 1 or 2. I consider them normal drinkers. I don?t think binge drinking is normal, even if it?s only done on the weekends. I also don?t think that someone that regularly abuses AL is a normal drinker. I do know that when I was drinking, I would often alter the definition of ?normal? to make my own level of drinking seem not so bad in my mind. I think that?s why I get a red flag when I read you say that you think you are a normie that abused alcohol. I have plenty of memories from my past that I could pull out to try to convince myself that maybe I?m just a normie that abused AL, and I?ve done that many times over, only to find out that it?s a very slippery slope. A ?normie that abuses AL? seems like such a contradiction of terms to me, but I suppose it depends on our own definitions of ?normie? and ?abuse.?
We all know that none of us would be here if alcohol had not been causing problems for us. Some are still trying to figure out the magnitude of the problem and if they can ever drink again, some know they can control their consumption and are doing it successfully, some know they can't and moderate to prevent further damage, and some of us know without a doubt that abstinence is our only way out. I think there?s a place for all of us here, so post away. Your posts don?t bother or annoy me. I see you as someone just trying to figure out where you fit and what?s true for you, and I?ve no doubt that you will.
Sheri
Hi LG,
I think we have all thought the same thing about ourselves at one point or another along the way. The difference for me is that I did all my contemplation and trying to control my drinking way before I began posting here.
I can remember taking the same tests that Kaslo mentioned and "cheating" as well, always putting more emphasis on the characteristics that pointed more toward me being the "normie" than the "alcoholic." Inevitably, I would convince myself that I had just developed a bad habit and vow once again to try to control my drinking while completely dismissing the HUGE red flag that normies don't search out tests to take to determine if they have a problem with alcohol. In retrospect, I can see so clearly now that I chose to see only what I wanted to see because I wasn?t yet ready or willing to commit to an AF life.
However, by the time I landed here, I was no longer in denial and knew that no matter what I was by definition (problem drinker or alcoholic) or what I had (disease or allergy or just a bad habit), alcohol was ruining my life and turning me into someone I didn't want to be, and had been progressively doing so for over 30 years. I really didn't have any interest in moderating because I had tried and failed so many times and knew that holding on to the idea that I might one day be able to drink again was going to prevent me from achieving what I knew I had to do to survive the rest of my life. I just wanted to be done with AL once and for all.
I have lots of people in my life that can take or leave alcohol and when they do drink, it?s generally only 1 or 2. I consider them normal drinkers. I don?t think binge drinking is normal, even if it?s only done on the weekends. I also don?t think that someone that regularly abuses AL is a normal drinker. I do know that when I was drinking, I would often alter the definition of ?normal? to make my own level of drinking seem not so bad in my mind. I think that?s why I get a red flag when I read you say that you think you are a normie that abused alcohol. I have plenty of memories from my past that I could pull out to try to convince myself that maybe I?m just a normie that abused AL, and I?ve done that many times over, only to find out that it?s a very slippery slope. A ?normie that abuses AL? seems like such a contradiction of terms to me, but I suppose it depends on our own definitions of ?normie? and ?abuse.?
We all know that none of us would be here if alcohol had not been causing problems for us. Some are still trying to figure out the magnitude of the problem and if they can ever drink again, some know they can control their consumption and are doing it successfully, some know they can't and moderate to prevent further damage, and some of us know without a doubt that abstinence is our only way out. I think there?s a place for all of us here, so post away. Your posts don?t bother or annoy me. I see you as someone just trying to figure out where you fit and what?s true for you, and I?ve no doubt that you will.
Sheri
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