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[Lou]

I don't know if im over reacting or being too sensitive about this....but i think my mum has developed a drinking problem...i was at her house earlier to pick up some stuff an i found empty half bottles of vodka hidden virtually everywhere. Plus i went to see her the other day and she was absolutely stinking drunk....now her excuse for this is that she works nights ( only 2 a week mind) so she drinks in the day to help her sleep. I think iv given my mother a drinking problem...she prob drinks to try an blot out what a mess iv made of things...and maybe to try to understand me a bit more. Alltho i aint drank for 45 days. We have issues too...regarding my childhood. I dont wanna sound selfish here but im just about getting myself together an i dont need this....just like i didnt need a lot of the crap that she brought in to my life as a child....sooooooo confused and all over the place..sorry for the depressing rant!!!

Love you guys x

[Accountable for Me]

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Lou, you are not to blame for anyones drinking problem!!! You did not give your mom a drinking problem.

If your mother is drinking it is because she is drinking for reasons unknown to you at the moment. When she is sober why don't you go and talk to her about it? That is if you want to.

I came from a shitty home when I was a kid. It has only been the last few years my mother and I made ammends and I forgave her for all the crap she did to me as a child. My mother started to pick up the bottle about 4 years ago.... she is now an alcoholic. God, our whole family is!! My mother didn't start drinking because I was a waste case. She started to drink in order to cope with her own emotional stuff. I have spoken to her about my concerns a few times, and you know, she has managed to slow down a bit. She needed someone to understand..... and that was me! Funny how life goes about at times!!

Concentrate on your own well being. If you feel like talking to your mom then do. But do it when she is sober. And don't own her problems!!! Those are her problems not yours. :l

[DidItForMe]

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Lou:
Nobody GIVES somebody a drinking problem. Hell, if that were true I'd wrap mine in a pretty package and give it to my worst enemy. Take care of yourself. You are doing great without drinking. Stay the course dear. If your mom does have a problem, you won't be any help to her (if she wants help) if you are drinking too. Hugs to you!

[Determinator]

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Lou, main thing is YOU are doing great. so congrads! If yer Mom reaches out her hand I'm sure you'll show her the way.

D.

[irishlady]

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Lou, I agree with all that has been said...Alcoholism IS NOT infectious, you can't catch it from someone else...Think back to when you were drinking, if someone had said to you, " I think you have a problem with alcohol " you would probably have denied it, I know I did....

You have gone 45 days AF up to now, that is great, so, concentrate on YOU, and, no, thats not selfish, that is one of the ways to beat this demon, you need all of your resources to do it, and just now you haven't any spare for anyone else..

That sounds terribly hard and harsh, but that is what it takes...Sometimes, you have to change your whole life routine, including dropping your drinking pals until you feel stronger and confident...

Going back to your first sentence though, I do agree with you, your mum has a drinking problem, but for now thats what it is, your mums problem, and by the sound of it, the excuses she is making, she is not yet ready to confront it, when she does, then I'm sure you will be there, until then, look after yourself....

Take care,

Love, Louise xx

[Lou]

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Thank you all for your kind and honsest words.... i know its something i have to confront....but for now i am happy and comforted by your opinions Thank you x x x x