Hey guys,
I felt like starting a new thread - mostly just for me....but love sharing for anyone that wants to read.
One thing I have always liked about posting here is its like a journal but a live one. One that writes back to you. Some of you know I am going through a rough time lately. I am so glad this place exists that ya can write and no one really knows ya but yet DOES know ya. I appreciate the connections I feel here.
With all this divorce crap I've been goin through (year and a half divorced just property settling stuff still) its been very hard on me. Mostly with the kids and theri dad gettin them to turn on me and all. I can say for the FIRST time in my 46 years of life......I truly have a broken heart. Never knew that pain till now. Kids will sure do it to ya.
But the other side of it is I cant actually believe how well I am holdin up. Still not drinkin - holdin on to my sobriety. I am so proud of myself. Though I feel so beat down....I still feel pretty sturdy. Feel so fragile - yet so strong. Tryin to keep workin through it at my own pace and somehow getting through it. I know this is all because I have remained sober.
I do know that hard times, stressful times are not all there is to life, but they are part of life that brings growth and moving forward. I just need to keep focusing my energy in a positive way to continue this growth so I can fine tune my skills and strength. I dont want to deprive myself of the growth and ability to move forward so I am hoping all this will motivate me to know my best so I can enjoy the easier times of life and the higher levels of living in a more fulfilled way.
This is my self talk for me today and I wanted to share with you all to help myself stay accountable.
Thanks you guys for listening.
I felt like starting a new thread - mostly just for me....but love sharing for anyone that wants to read.
One thing I have always liked about posting here is its like a journal but a live one. One that writes back to you. Some of you know I am going through a rough time lately. I am so glad this place exists that ya can write and no one really knows ya but yet DOES know ya. I appreciate the connections I feel here.
With all this divorce crap I've been goin through (year and a half divorced just property settling stuff still) its been very hard on me. Mostly with the kids and theri dad gettin them to turn on me and all. I can say for the FIRST time in my 46 years of life......I truly have a broken heart. Never knew that pain till now. Kids will sure do it to ya.
But the other side of it is I cant actually believe how well I am holdin up. Still not drinkin - holdin on to my sobriety. I am so proud of myself. Though I feel so beat down....I still feel pretty sturdy. Feel so fragile - yet so strong. Tryin to keep workin through it at my own pace and somehow getting through it. I know this is all because I have remained sober.
I do know that hard times, stressful times are not all there is to life, but they are part of life that brings growth and moving forward. I just need to keep focusing my energy in a positive way to continue this growth so I can fine tune my skills and strength. I dont want to deprive myself of the growth and ability to move forward so I am hoping all this will motivate me to know my best so I can enjoy the easier times of life and the higher levels of living in a more fulfilled way.
This is my self talk for me today and I wanted to share with you all to help myself stay accountable.
Thanks you guys for listening.
eace:
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