Anxiety...

[briseus]

The anxiety is getting worse and worse.
I am having a particularly bad day and I am taking it out on my poor boyfriend.
We were driving home from visiting friends and he was chatty & happy and I kept shitting on everything he was saying.
Why am I being such an asshole?
Why do I have this feeling of impending doom?

[mama bear]

Anxiety...

I battle anxiety and depression. I have to remember this is not normal and often have to bite my tongue...meds have helped me tremendously

[Wagoneer]

Anxiety...

I'm so sorry that you are feeling that way - When I have fallen off the wagon and are trying to get back on, I remember acting all kinds of bitchy to my kids and husband. For no reason other than I am pissed off that I can't drink like a normal person and the realization that I can never drink again. EVER. It is scary and maddening and screws with your emotions. I liken it to having nasty PMS. I take Kudzo and the L-Glut, tons of healthy foods (no refined sugars or flour and tons of lemon water) and I swear it works. And get your mind off the AL...Do ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING NOT to be in your drinking zone. You can do this. It is freakin hard, but well worth it. You are in my thoughts! You REALLY CAN DO THIS.

[Wagoneer]

Anxiety...

...and what Mama said - something to consider (for me too!) ((((Mama))))))

[dixon]

Anxiety...

Bri,
Can you try gingko biloba which is working wonderfully with me for anxiety and depression.it id a supplement.
I have dropped other medicine.it geve me instant gratification.
Dix

[mama bear]

Anxiety...

I have heard GABA is very soothing too

[hart]

Anxiety...

Briseus, it is natural to feel this way when you first stop drinking. What will make you feel better is to tell your boyfriend that you realize you are being a b*tch, that it is because you are going AF and you apologize and really appreciate his understanding and will try and do better.

Also, when you start hearing yourself say stuff you hate, physically stop yourself. Maybe a rubberband or other physical cue can help at first. Maybe chew gum, something than can cue you to stop that tongue and give your brain a chance to stop those impulses.

[baclofan]

Anxiety...

briseus;1358571 wrote: The anxiety is getting worse and worse.
I am having a particularly bad day and I am taking it out on my poor boyfriend.
We were driving home from visiting friends and he was chatty & happy and I kept shitting on everything he was saying.
Why am I being such an asshole?
Why do I have this feeling of impending doom?

Don't worry bris, kinda feels ubnormal and yet is sooo normal, its called: PAWS - Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrom/ symptom....been there...than that...and felt this feeling of impending doom as well...sooo many times...

[LibraryGirl]

Anxiety...

I have been on these highs and lows as well. I started thinking about my dog Sophie who died 8 years ago, and how I took her to the vet on her last day of life, hoping for a miracle and she died there overnight. I started sobbing uncontrollably, and still start tearing up writing this. That was last night. I also go into rages where I irrationally name every thing I can think of that's wrong and just go mad, way too often. I don't know if I was dampening these feelings with AL (definitely some), if quitting abruptly after drinking heavily for so many years is the reason I'm acting crazy or if I'm clinically depressed. Or, if it's menopause. So yes, I get it Bri. I soooo get it.:l

[briseus]

Anxiety...

I am disappointed in myself.
I drank.
I didn't get shitfaced. And I really cannot be hard on myself. I could go on a binge but what would be the point? They say relapses are a part of recovery. This is my first relapse and I'm not liking it. Obviously.
I felt instant relief when I took that first glass - but I knew that the next day it wouldn't have solved a thing. Emotions were running high. I was alone and there was booze in the house.
I had a really good talk with my friend, boyfriend and Mom and they just said to not dwell on it and keep moving forward.
Because what would be the point of beating myself up over it? It was a slip and I have learned and now need a different plan of attack.

I hope you are all not disappointed.
Just need a bit of support right now.

I am not going to take this as an opportunity to keep drinkin.

As I was told last night - "Geeze, it's not the end of the world..."

[Wagoneer]

Anxiety...

Briseus - it happens. It is not the end of the world, you are right, but if alcohol is a problem, it could be a big deal. When I stopped drinking, I had alot of people tell me, "Oh it's just one glass of wine, one beer, etc." and to them it WAS nothing big. For me, who has no "off" or "moderate" switch, it was huge. They unwittingly sabotage your quest to stop drinking. They really are trying to support you and make you feel better about a slip because they love you, but if they do not have a drinking problem, they have no idea what their words can do - for me it gave me just another excuse to go out and but a bottle of wine. Maybe you need to tell them that you need them to support your sobriety and it is NOT ok to drink. I hope I am not speaking out of turn, but this is my experience. I have huge stressors in my life right now with work and family and it certainly would be easy to have a glass. But I can't. Even if I really, really want it and booze is in the house. Sobriety is really, really hard, but the payoff in the long run is immeasurable.

Don't beat yourself up over it, and we are definitely NOT disappointed in you. Hell I have been there a million times. Knowing that I won't have to be there again (God willing) makes me happy and feel strong and there is nothing better than those feelings.

I wish you the best of luck and we are always here for support.

Waggy

[mama bear]

Anxiety...

Hon...no judgement here....just get back on the sober train
hiya Waggy.....always so good to see you

[littlepinkcat]

Anxiety...

Wagoneer;1358862 wrote: Briseus - it happens. It is not the end of the world, you are right, but if alcohol is a problem, it could be a big deal. When I stopped drinking, I had alot of people tell me, "Oh it's just one glass of wine, one beer, etc." and to them it WAS nothing big. For me, who has no "off" or "moderate" switch, it was huge. They unwittingly sabotage your quest to stop drinking. They really are trying to support you and make you feel better about a slip because they love you, but if they do not have a drinking problem, they have no idea what their words can do - for me it gave me just another excuse to go out and but a bottle of wine. Maybe you need to tell them that you need them to support your sobriety and it is NOT ok to drink. I hope I am not speaking out of turn, but this is my experience. I have huge stressors in my life right now with work and family and it certainly would be easy to have a glass. But I can't. Even if I really, really want it and booze is in the house. Sobriety is really, really hard, but the payoff in the long run is immeasurable.

Don't beat yourself up over it, and we are definitely NOT disappointed in you. Hell I have been there a million times. Knowing that I won't have to be there again (God willing) makes me happy and feel strong and there is nothing better than those feelings.

I wish you the best of luck and we are always here for support.

Waggy

Hi waggy, i know what you mean a prime example is my mates know I don't drink they don't know I was developing a major problem with alcohol, but they think its for medical reasons I don't drink, so they say yeah its ok, no probs u don't drink we will support u , then yesterday my mate invited me for a few beers for her birthday, i declined nicely as it was her birthday and today my other mate texted me saying di i want to go over to see her next week for an alcohol free night? i said yeah sounds good, then she texted me saying she was off work the next day and fancied a few drinks when we met up, so i declined nicely again, just like u were saying some people just think its ok 4 u to slip up, maybe for them, but it causes devistation here in my life. I have come to the conclusion i would rather sit in on my own or be with people who dont drink then be with my so called mates who i have known for nearly 11 years who say go on have a drink. I hope in the future i can be around them whilst they drink nd try to get me to , but defo not at the moment. I just wanted to share this to say i know where ur coming from, Pinky

[Struggles 106]

Anxiety...

Hey Bris

Keep going with your efforts! I will tell what happened to me-I had 107 days, and then had a slip.
I talked about it right away. I feel like the backlash made it worse.

BUT at any rate you just have to stay strong and accept it for what it was. Please don't let it get you started into a long slide down! It is so easy to do. Once alcohol is int he body it sort of all starts up again, in terms of craving physiologically.

As I have said I am on Antabuse. I can't just NOT take it now-since I have to admit to myself EXACTLY why I'm not taking it-to enable drinking. So I take it.

I was leery of taking it, of ordering from a Canadian pharmacy, no prescription and all that. BUT it is better than killing myself with alcohol which is where I was going.

Keep the faith Bris!

[K9Lover]

Anxiety...

Hi Bri!
No disappointments here. You slipped, and it happens. I've been there, done that thousands of times. What you realized is that it didn't help anything. So move forward and remember that alcohol does not improve a darn thing, it's poison and your body doesn't want it. Hang in there my friend, you'll get through this and come out stronger! I have faith in you!
:h
K9