The Purging Page

[Slaythefear]

As part of a cleansing process, I am starting a purge page. Sometimes, you want to say something out loud or to people as a way to cleanse or purge out something that has been or is bothering you. Feel free to add if it is helpful to you in anyway. Hopefully, any thoughts posted here will not offend anyone. It is merely meant to be healing as something you just need or want to get off your chest and doesn't even need to make sense to others. I have many, but rather than say this to people who know me, I will leave it here.


First one: Bars are full of people who love to gossip, judge, backstab and babble stupidity! You will find an abundance of hypocrisy.



Warning: I believe on day 17, I am having PAWS symptoms after being euphoric after completing the initial withdrawal phase. Either that or by not suppressing internal hurts/wounds and bothersome issues, they are getting free to come to the surface raw in the light of day. Probably a combination of both or maybe that is what PAWS is...things that begin to be set free from within the brain that have been suppressed...opened channels. I am the suffer in silence type, so for those of you who have responded to some threads I posted on, I'm not ignoring you, I'm just in a silent mode. I'm having quite a few things hit the surface right now, but thought I'd post this here before it wound up on my facebook page. It didn't feel good enough to just put it in my journal like the other things.

Still determined and AF on day 17. Good day and wishes for AF success to all.

[hadit]

The Purging Page

Bars are full of people who are drinking al. I have been one of them many times and most of what comes out of my mouth is not REALLY me! The more I drink the more Bull........T I talk. Don't want that any more. Thanks for the thread!!! Thanks Slay for the thread,its a good idea and if it helps one of us drunks to bury the beast it will be so worth it:goodjob::goodjob::goodjob:

[Slaythefear]

The Purging Page

When adults act like high school kids, form clicks and vote one person or older member better than all the rest on a SEPARATE DEVOTED POST. I think it demeans the others who have and are just as helpful if not more helpful. This isn't a popularity contest. Keep it professional and not like a high school dance announcing a King or Queen. Thanks belong within the applicable threads. Main threads are for everyone, not just one person to be praised above all others in such a delicate environment. Common sense.

JMO

[Kradle123]

The Purging Page

Slaythefear;1375855 wrote: When adults act like high school kids, form clicks and vote one person or older member better than all the rest on a SEPARATE DEVOTED POST. I think it demeans the others who have and are just as helpful if not more helpful. This isn't a popularity contest. Keep it professional and not like a high school dance announcing a King or Queen. Thanks belong within the applicable threads. Main threads are for everyone, not just one person to be praised above all others in such a delicate environment. Common sense.

JMO

Slay, forgive me but I thought this thread's intent was a page to purge ourselves of 'outside' problems and rants not a passive aggressive way to bitch about people who have pissed us off here at MWO... IMO that s way counterproductive...

Unless I misunderstood your last post in which case I apologise for the error.

:l

[dixon]

The Purging Page

I am here to lament that my wife has been taking help of others ( she say her boy friend which I cant hear at all ) just ignoring me so I am blatantly worried about .
I think I am sufficient to do anything and believe there is a solution to a every single problems.
But she ignores me...
Dix

[red67]

The Purging Page

[QUOTE=Slaythefear;1375855]When adults act like high school kids, form clicks and vote one person or older member better than all the rest on a SEPARATE DEVOTED POST. I think it demeans the others who have and are just as helpful if not more helpful. This isn't a popularity contest. Keep it professional and not like a high school dance announcing a King or Queen. Thanks belong within the applicable threads. Main threads are for everyone, not just one person to be praised above all others in such a delicate environment. Common sense."

I have to agree on this. I think special thank yous belong in pm's or on a thread in response to the help. To single out members demeans the many people who help everyday. There are so many wonderful people here and we need and appreciate all of them.

[Slaythefear]

The Purging Page

Kradle123;1375888 wrote: Slay, forgive me but I thought this thread's intent was a page to purge ourselves of 'outside' problems and rants not a passive aggressive way to bitch about people who have pissed us off here at MWO... IMO that s way counterproductive...

Unless I misunderstood your last post in which case I apologise for the error.

:l

Kradle, no need to apologize. In my world, I appreciate honesty and reality. I know how to address that versus dishonesty and games. You are a person I appreciate on these boards and I so feel for your marital stresses, but I am a very honest person who will not tolerate games and bs, so in light of that I feel I may need to leave this board due to clicks and high school behavior. I'm about solutions and reality not little clicks and ego trips. My first one and a half weeks here were very helpful due to the withdrawal phase, but now i see a different game going on here that I don't feel is helpful for the long term. I'm too grown up to play this game. However, I wish you all well. I'm an adult. Carry on and may you all wake who haven't to the high school training of our youth. I'm way past that in my life. I didn't get caught up in alcohol because I needed attention. I had much more serious issues. I want to help people! I don't want to intimidate or put them back in high school games. Best of wishes to those who want to heal and be outside of that bs.

Honest well wishes to all you newbies! It's a tough road and you don't need hs bs and clicks along your journey. Find your strength and don't cling to clicks. YOU are who you are and that is absolutely what you were meant to contribute to this world. Never forget that!

Best wishes.

[red67]

The Purging Page

Slaythefear, this place is really like everything else in life. Take what works for you and ignore the rest. You are fairly early in recovery and it is really important to keep viligant everyday. Maybe you are one that can do that on your own, but I really think even with its problems, this place is a great place.

If this site doesnt seem like a good fit please try something else. Maybe Smart Recovery? Thats what finally got me on the road to sobriety after so many failed attempts with AA and counseling.

Best of luck to you no matter what you decide! Keep up the fight cause it is definitely worth it.

[Slaythefear]

The Purging Page

[quote]red67;1376018 wrote:

When adults act like high school kids, form clicks and vote one person or older member better than all the rest on a SEPARATE DEVOTED POST. I think it demeans the others who have and are just as helpful if not more helpful. This isn't a popularity contest. Keep it professional and not like a high school dance announcing a King or Queen. Thanks belong within the applicable threads. Main threads are for everyone, not just one person to be praised above all others in such a delicate environment. Common sense."

I have to agree on this. I think special thank yous belong in pm's or on a thread in response to the help. To single out members demeans the many people who help everyday. There are so many wonderful people here and we need and appreciate all of them.

*Be strong, red. Don't let anyone ever put you in a place below another person. I have always felt a need to fight for the under dog since I was a very young girl. I had special protection growing up, and I saw the inequality that others had to deal with and it has always been a place I step in and try to make right. I feel a need to step in and protect those who feel less than they should. It's a purpose I feel is very important and I was born with. I speak for those who won't or are not able to speak for themselves.

Build your strength! YOU deserve it!!!! Don't ever let someone make you feel less than you were meant to be. Best wishes. :l

[NoraC]

The Purging Page

Lori - I have been looking at Smart Recovery in the last few days. Thanks for mentioning that.

Slay - I'm sorry that you feel like that. I hope that you look around and find a place that you feel comfortable. I have a couple of places that I post where I do feel comfortable. I can share what I am going thru and I know that I will get the support and the kick in the butt that I need. I certainly don't think of it as a click. I get a lot of very helpful advise there. It is an open thread for everyone and all are welcome. (One Step at a Time)

Great job on 14 days!!!

[Kradle123]

The Purging Page

Oh my dear Slay:h

You are so strong in your struggle. I see it in your posts. And reds right...early days yet...and there's The PAWS thing...that acronym always makes me think the dogs are after us.

My dear friend who is a district court judge here has always said to me that adulthood is nothing more than a continuation of high school...There's truth to that for sure. And being a judge she's seen some stuff

Still I understand and will quote you to you because you have the best quotes:h

Don't change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love you.

I like that one so much, I want to give it to my husband...but you know he'll take it the wrong way

Hugs and strength
:l

[Slaythefear]

The Purging Page

NoraC;1376112 wrote: Lori - I have been looking at Smart Recovery in the last few days. Thanks for mentioning that.

Slay - I'm sorry that you feel like that. I hope that you look around and find a place that you feel comfortable. I have a couple of places that I post where I do feel comfortable. I can share what I am going thru and I know that I will get the support and the kick in the butt that I need. I certainly don't think of it as a click. I get a lot of very helpful advise there. It is an open thread for everyone and all are welcome. (One Step at a Time)

Great job on 14 days!!!

THANK YOU, NORA!!! I don't mean to upset anyone here. I will leave peacefully. I felt that I needed to state something in case some others were feeling something they were unable to express. It's my nature to stand up for underdogs/people who won't express their feelings. I wish you all the blessings life can offer. I don't mean it in a mean spirited way. Keep fighting for what is good for you. I have passively read your posts and you appear to be a very gentle and kind person. :h Be well!

[Slaythefear]

The Purging Page

Kradle123;1376113 wrote: Oh my dear Slay:h

You are so strong in your struggle. I see it in your posts. And reds right...early days yet...and there's The PAWS thing...that acronym always makes me think the dogs are after us.

My dear friend who is a district court judge here has always said to me that adulthood is nothing more than a continuation of high school...There's truth to that for sure. And being a judge she's seen some stuff

Still I understand and will quote you to you because you have the best quotes:h

Don't change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love you.

I like that one so much, I want to give it to my husband...but you know he'll take it the wrong way

Hugs and strength
:l

LOVE YOU, Kradle! I wish I could fight all the demons for everyone. I really do! I was born that way for some reason. Maybe that is my purpose in life. I just can't shake my defense for others. I just want to wrap everyone in my arms and spit on all their problems. I so hope you all succeed. I just felt something going on here that I wanted to express for others who may not have felt they could express it. That's my nature. I'm strong for others and yet weak for myself at times. Good luck to you. love! I mean that!

[NoraC]

The Purging Page

Slay - I did just want to add one more thing. When I first joined here. I did have a problem finding my way. It seemed like everyone knew everyone. I was odd man out. It took me a couple months or more before I found my comfort zone. Was able to find a couple people that I felt comfortable with, etc.
My point is that I now that I'm thinking more about what you said, I do have to agree to some degree. I rarely see people trying to form clicks. But, I do think that as a new person posting here, it can be hard to jump in.
I will definitely try to be more aware of that. :h

[red67]

The Purging Page

Great response Nora. I learn so much from the responses here. I never even thought about how newcomers may perceive the more senior members. I know I have connected more with newcomers but I truly never felt ignored by the senior members. I now see that it may appear different than what I may have thought. I hate to think some new people and maybe even some who have been here for awhile may feel left out. Thank you for bringing this up.